Do you think it's ok?

Question

a story about a girl and her bf [the ups and downs of their relationship sorta]. Ok here, summary-
Girl and her bf have bee fighting alot lately, the story starts off with them in a restraunt fighting of course. Girl walks out angry, bf follows her, girl drives off and not even five mintues later gets into a car crash that results of her being in a coma for a while. Bf is devasted. Girl wakes up in 'limbo' and finds she needs to redeem herself if she wants to be alive on earth again. Meets her guide who helps her help a [very] stubborn teen throughout the story. Bf deals with his life w/out her at home, including his parents' recent divorce......interesting or no?

Answer 1

You need to add more detail about the girls life before the accident..selfish, mean, ect, so the story reader will know what she is redeeming herself from.. and then go into what she learns about people and life as she helps the teen.. then show what changes in here thinking that helps her succeed and get her life back...