What should a female do if her boyfriend whom she loves gives her an engament ring she doesn't like?

Question

-and this didn't happen to me, I only wish I could get someone to give me an engagement ring. lol.
I just was thinking about it the other day when I saw a ring that I fell in love with.

Has anyone been in this situation? How did you, or how do you think you would handle it?

Let me explain my thoughts a little more...I am not saying he gives you a cheap ring, I am just saying what if it is not your style. Like if all you wear is white gold, or silver anf he gives you a yellow gold ring...now for the rest of your life you either have to force yourself to were the color jewelry you don't like...or just not match.

Answer 1

No, i havent been in that spot but...Just be frank with him. Tell him you love the idea he got you a ring, but lets go to the store and pick one we both really like together. whatever you do though, dont drop hints. you like something, say it!

Answer 2

The engagement ring is a gift. Since this "gift" is something you would have for the rest of your life (I hope), I would think that you should be able to exchange it.

Approach the situation very carefully. You definitely want to pick something the same price or lower. Think about how you would feel if someone returned your gift. If the ring you really like is more than the original one, you should pay the difference.

Another option would be just to suck it up and keep it. I understand what you mean about having different styles. I wear all gold and if my husband had picked out a silver or white gold ring I wouldn't be too happy about it. Would I try to exchange it? Yes, but if I found that it would upset him, like if it was a family heirloom, I would just focus on the meaning behind the ring and not the ring itself.

Answer 3

This actually happened at a place I used to work. My boss got a ring from her fiance. He paid $3000 for it. She informed him that it was the wrong one and sent him back to the jewelry store to buy the right one. I could not believe my ears!! All I could think about is how shallow she is. And why on earth did he actually get the other one?!? Can you say "Control Freak"!?!
As far as me personally, I've been married twice. Both times, when the subject of marriage got brought up, he nonchalantly took me for a walk at the mall and "just happened" to stop by the jeweler's to get ideas. My second marriage almost ended in divorce and while we were separated, the rings made a trip to the bottom of a lake. When we got back together, he felt horrible about tossing the rings. He bought me a plain white gold band to replace them. (That's all he could afford at the time.) Honestly, I've always hated white gold and silver because I'm very fair complected. But the six years this new ring represents has been a helluva lot better than the six from the other. I've even told him I don't ever want to replace it with-as he puts it-a "real wedding band". I love him, not the ring.
God Bless

Answer 4

OK...I get it...

All I wish for you is that when the day comes and someone proposes...I truly truly hope that when you see the ring, you are not so obsessed with just the ring that you forget what's more important. In the moment, feel the happiness. Feel the sincerity in his proposal. Be content that some great guy is choosing you...and hell with the ring shape, color, size. Do you understand how difficult it is to 1) find someone ) find someone who wants to commit to you for ever? Forget about the ring and concentrate on how wonderful the proposal is.

If afterwards, you truly don't like the ring, wait.

My husband has great taste and I'm thrilled with the ring that he bought me but the setting was just not me. After 3 years, one day, I just asked him if I could change the setting. By then it had been years so he was not hurt at all. So one day, I went to the jeweler and changed the setting to something I liked. I also loved "big" stones so for my 5th year, I hinted that I would love something like a cushion cut. Of course, my husband was very sweet and he told me to go for it...so earlier this year I got this beautiful, cushion cut ring as my 2nd ring.

I am so glad that wore the ring he gave me for my wedding because it was something he choose. I knew that he was the one because he never once "made" me stick with it...and has proven over the years to encourage me to embellish, improve, change my setting anytime I wanted. I love my husband and it's not about the ring...but what a great match he is...

Answer 5

Ohhh, this is such a terrible situation! I love the people that say "oh you'll learn to love it because you love him." Right, everyday you want to look down at your hand an look at a ring you don't like for the rest of your life. That's fun. When my now husband and I were talking marriage we went looking at rings together so he could see what I liked. Then when he was ready to take the lunge he enlisted my best friend for help. He ended up getting me a solitaire just to be on the safe side, and then told me I could have it reset in the setting of my choice. Now, 3 years later, I still love my engagement ring as much as the day I got it. It's sentimental, it's beautiful, it has special meaning to me because I picked a setting that reminded me of my great grandmother's wedding ring, and most importantly I love the man that gave it to me because he went out of his way to make sure that I got something that fits my personality, and makes me really happy.

If you happen to be on the receiving end of a ring you don't like - most are exchangeable!! Good luck!

Answer 6

I say suck it up. And you know what when that moment happens, you will not care what that friggin ring looks like. I had picked out a bunch of rings and the one my boyfriend proposed with was not one of them, but man do I love that ring! I love that he picked it out himself; that he cared enough to go into a million stores and find the one that he thought would be perfect for me. I think that if a person is shallow enough to hate an engagement ring that their beloved has given them, they probably are not ready to be married. I know this girl and she gave her engagement ring back to her boyfriend three times; same boy, she couldn't decide on a ring. They have been married for almost a year and he has already moved out and threatening divorce. A girl that is that picky about an engagment ring does not deserve one. And who knows you might end up like me, I picked out rings that were about $1000 (practical) and the one I ended up getting is $7000. Lucky me! I really wouldn't worry about it, because you will be surprised as to how you feel in "that moment."

Answer 7

I have been given tons of jewleryu peices by ex boyfriends that I never really liked when I got given them. I gave him the whole massive "OMG I love it" and wore it all the time and I fell in love with it. I guess what matters is the momento behind the peice of jewlery. If your planning on getting married, or thinking about getting engaged, let your partner know what you like, make comments, and make your jewlery choices show your style. I have been with my current boyfriend for about 4 months now, and already he knows that I hate yellow gold. Its simple little facts like that that males should pick up on with earlier gifts, if you are trying to find her taste, take her to a jewlery store or a store that stocks jewlery and have a look at what she looks at, I mean even just pretend your looking for a new dress watch and need to go. Men are generally pretty good once they know what they after. With engagement rings it can be really hard, cos it is meant to be something that is meant to be forever. So find out what she likes before you spend hundreds on a ring that she will have to fall in love with. find her tastes by taking her shopping :) Christmas is a great time for this cos you can say that your looking to get something for your mom or something and then take her to the jewlery shop and find out what she likes. GOOD LUCK :)

Answer 8

First off unless you want to pay for it be grateful he spent his money and time picking out a ring for you. Stop being so selfish if you love the guy it wouldn't matter if the ring was bronze and tarnished. I certainly wouldn't be upset if a guy had given me a ring that wasnt "my style" you'd assume if your at the point where marraige is being discussed the guy knows your "style" but regardless if you love the man it wouldnt matter what the ring looked like.

Answer 9

An engagement ring is a symbol of love NOT a fashion statement! And it is fine to wear gold and silver together.

Answer 10

Maybe he's not the right guy if he doesn't want your imput on what you want from a ring. After all, you're going to wear the thing on your hand for the rest of your life (that's the goal, anyways).

My hubby and I went shopping for my ring together. I love the one I got and will wear it happily every day for the rest of my life.

Answer 11

That is entirely private. I have identified a number of females who've stored the hoop in view that in spite of everything it was once a reward technically, but when the connection ended mutaully and the hoop was once an highly-priced funding i could say provide the hoop again