I received a low-fat cookbook from my father-in-law for Christmas a few years back. However, we didn't see him to exchange gifts until March, and by then I had lost 20 lbs. (which was all I needed to lose). Then he and his wife said "but it looks like you don't need it now". Was that really insensitive or is it just me?
2006-12-18 14:25:45 · 15 answers · asked by kittycatcarrie 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I think they were trying to pay you a compliment in their quirky way. Saying "but it looks like you don't need it now" should be translated to "You look great, we're sorry we got you a useless gift". There are times we all say stupid things...some people have this problem more often than others.
If you can't change something, change the way you think about it.
2006-12-18 14:54:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
completely insensitive.
And remember, you shouldn't feel bad about receiving a bad gift from someone else. A gift SHOULD be a gesture where someone offers someone else something that they wouldn't get for themselves or an indulgence they know the person would like. The unexpected gift of a low-fat cookbook isn't either of those things.
Besides that, once you receive a gift, you're under no obligation to use it - and they shouldn't expect you to. For true gift givers, the gesture should be enough. In your case, it seemed like an extremely inappropriate gesture that I don't see as a gift at all.
2006-12-18 15:00:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Regardless of their intentions, it was an insensitive comment, but not necessarily a malicious one. I find my mouth constantly gathering foot because of comments like these. For example, they might have picked up the cookbook just because they like the recipes, then, meaning to remark on your amazing svelteness, say that the cookbook is unnecessary. So... yes, a faux pas on their part, but maybe not deliberate. Congrats on the weight loss!
2006-12-18 14:35:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
They might have thought they were getting you something you would use since you were on a diet. They wanted to get you something useful. It is kind of insensitive, but it sounds like they wanted to show they cared about you. At least they didn't get you a giant Hershey kiss or a big box of chocolate.
2006-12-18 14:48:17 · answer #4 · answered by sarajane 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I certainly wouldn't be offended, even if I wasn't overweight. The Heart Cookbook is one of our more frequently-used cookbooks. The recipes are not only healthy but mostly inexpensive and some are outstanding for taste.
2006-12-18 14:32:51 · answer #5 · answered by zee_prime 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Sure! that could be an robust present for her if she has been complaining! But, it could be well for those who upload yet another present with it that has whatever to do with cooking! But, the phrase "vitamin" has so be hidden! Just provide an explanation for the vitamin facet to her! i believe that it is an great present! Hope i Helped! Merry Christmas!
2016-09-03 16:25:32 · answer #6 · answered by mcguinn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Looks like the cookbook worked. Must be you...
2006-12-18 14:34:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Next Christmas pick something you don't like about them and give them a gift about it. Twenty pounds you say? Wow, they are real jerks.
2006-12-18 14:33:05 · answer #8 · answered by alicesarbonne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think of it this way: he was concerned about your health. If you aren't into maintaining your weight with a low-fat diet, then give the book to the library.
2006-12-18 14:36:18 · answer #9 · answered by Pythonette 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Take a good look in the mirror and then go on a diet!
that is what inlaws do ..
2006-12-18 14:29:50 · answer #10 · answered by Mark B 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋