I been in love with my boyfriend for four years and seven months and a week but I know we are not ready to have a baby...reasons why are Im not finish with school and he is....he is about to join the navy...I just want it to be me and him right now...but my boyfriend has been going thru alot and he said that the last thing that he do before he leave this world is that he want to have a baby with me and he dont care who like or not cause he wants to keep his spirit alive if he die thats why he wants a child ........but also we are still teenagers ...Deep down I LOVE HIM to DEATH and I want to make him happy ...........Help me what should I do
2006-12-18 12:48:51 · 15 answers · asked by Black Butterfly 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sexy: You do not want to bring a child into this world, who would lack a father. You would be saddled with the child. A child isn't something people procreate and place it on the shelf, on display, for everyone to see ... it's a human being requiring lots of nurturing, time put into it, and instruction. It's called people making ! Finish your education you started, let him do his Navy thing ( I think it is an Honourable thing to serve one's Country) and after this is done, make a baby with him and both, you and him will be accessible to the child. You need to love the child [baby] as much as you love your guy. Good luck to all of you !!!
2006-12-18 12:58:40 · answer #1 · answered by guraqt2me 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, if you are a teenager and still in school you aren't ready to have a baby. While your boyfriend's feelings are understandable, these are the wrong circumstances in which to have a baby. It would be selfish to bring a child into the world that you are not fully prepared to support. It is also selfish of your boyfriend to place you in a position where you have a high likelihood of being a single teenage mother. Don't let your boyfriend pressure you into a decision that will change your life forever.
2006-12-18 12:53:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
no way do you have a baby if you aren't ready. once you have a baby, that is it for the rest of your life. you now have that baby to take care of and put first forever. sounds like he is scared out of his wits about dying in the navy and wants to have a biological child so he can feel like part of him is living on . I understand that impulse, but no matter how much you love him, if you are not ready for a baby you must not accomodate him. that's his problem and no real good reason to have a baby. loving him should be enough to make him happy and you should tell him that. you can't give up your whole life because he is scared. you can empathize, but that is a lot to ask. a child is forever, I know, I have three and I love them to death, but I had them because I wanted them and had that maternal impulse to have a baby in me. if you are not feeling that, you can't have a baby. especially as a teenager. what are you going to do for money? you don't want to wind up with a baby, maybe he dies overseas (I pray he doesn't) living on military housing in poverty level conditions with nothing and no prospects. if he insists on the baby th ing and won't back down, protect your self and break up with him. it will kill you for awhile but you will get over it. you have to live your life for you. no one else can or will.
2006-12-18 12:56:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well hun,its been four years,but don't feel pressured to have a child. You are still a teenager,you don't want him to go off to iraq or something and you'll be left alone with a baby. Being a single mom is no joke,and the cost of living is sky high.
If he loves you,he can honestly wait,and you tell him you sincerly love him,and that you want to wait. The moment that in your heart of hearts,you feel that you can fullfill your desire to have a child with the man you love,make it evident,and you both can rejoice in a happy moment,in creating a family.
2006-12-18 12:54:09 · answer #4 · answered by Ellie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you would be able to desire to sit down down down and have a talk approximately this you would be able to desire to tell him why you think now must be the right time for having a newborn for you and permit him tell you why he feels he isnt effectual. you would be able to desire to return to a compromise suitable here, in any different case once you become pregnant he could probable think under pressure into it and could probable no longer think like he may be ready to help ypu. as a mom of two boys i understand the way lots stress a sparkling born can placed on a dating so as which you would be able to desire to substantiate which you in simple terms and your boyfriend are thoroughly dedicated to a minimum of one yet another and be waiting for a turbulent adventure!! yet once you're thinking conceiving then now may be a nicely time to start taking folic acid nutritional supplementations those are significant in helping maintain removed from spina bifida in he fetus. even nonetheless critically i want you each and every and all of the wonderful and that i desire your boyfriend comes around. having babies is this style of rewarding enjoy.
2016-10-15 05:08:55 · answer #5 · answered by dudik 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He only wants to have a baby so you are more likely to wait for him while he is gone. He's filling your head with sentimental bullcrap to get you to go along with the idea. "keep his spirit alive if he dies" that's the most ridiculous thing i've ever heard. It is never a good idea for teenagers to have kids- you just don't have enough life expierence to handle that situation. It's also a bad idea to have a kid while knowing that the father won't be around to support you and help raise the kid. All you would be doing is ruining two lives; yours, and your kid's life.
2006-12-18 12:58:06 · answer #6 · answered by Motumbo the Destructakon 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
His point of view probably stems from the heavy deployments facing the military today. Even so, such fear of death isn't common among people that haven't actually deployed or aren't scheduled to. Try and get him to seek some level of psychological help.
Oh, and don't have a baby with him if you're truly not ready to.
2006-12-18 12:53:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Um. He is asking to do it all out of order. The baby needs a father, not a prideful dead dad. How's the baby going to fare without a father? Your boyfriend is being very very selfish towards you and to the baby. Wait to get married.
2006-12-18 12:52:54 · answer #8 · answered by SmartAlex 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
F no don't do it. first off there are good reasons to have a baby, nothing you listed up there is a good reason to have a baby. Second off....no just don't do it, it's a terrible idea......
2006-12-18 12:54:31 · answer #9 · answered by Jazz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
your the one with the oven and the bird doesn't go in the oven unless it's marinated first.
your the one that has to carry the baby and your the one that has to go through the pain of having it. i say whatever you say goes and he should respect that no matter what his wishes are.
2006-12-18 12:57:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋