I'm a compulsive flirt. What should I do...?

Question

Okay, so, I'm kind of a "compulsive flirt." That's just my thing. It's what I do. I'm not even flirting with guys- I guess it just seems like I am. I get all giggly and smile and touch their arm or whatever whenever they're talking to me. I can't really help it. The words "Baby" and "Sweetie" are just a part of how I talk. Thing is, I have a boyfriend and he just doesn't understand. He actually gets mad at me when I "flirt" with other guys. I've told him that it's not really something I can control but he's just like, "Wow. No, I really think you can." Is anybody else like this? Do you know how to "control" it or whatever. I mean, it really is just what I do. GOSH. LoL! Thanks.

Love Always-- Summer Hampton*

Answer 1

Quit being so insecure and needy.

And why dont you put yourself in your boyfriends place. I bet you wouldnt like it if he was doing it to you.

Answer 2

Well just because you're not actually doing anything outside of flirting doesnt mean its ok.
Your boyfriend obviously is uncomfortable and threatened by your behavious and you have to think at the end of the day which is more important - him or your "flirting".
Relationships are about give and take and comprimise.
Your boyfriend is unhappy and you dont seem to care about the fact hes jealous and hurt by the way you carry on with other guys.
If you're not willing to change your ways - or at least soften your flirting then I think it may be kinder to dump him. I mean how would you feel if you had to watch your boyfriend flirt with other girls and cal the baby etc? Its not a nice thing to have to do!!
Not meaning to be offensive - but you sound quite immature and selfish. Maybe you're not ready to be in a proper relationship at this stage. xx

Answer 3

ok so ur a junior. that means i's well old enough 2b ur pa but if u were my girl i would feel real jealous of u flirting. as long as u don't disappear with any fellas or not come home with b/f i suppose it's not too bad.
personal i think it is an addiction 4u.
like an OCD, like smoking or gambling
that would make u a compulsive flirt.
i used 2b addicted to the adrenal rush of playing sport.
i suspect that when u flirt, chemicals are released into ur body which u have become addicted to. if u don't flirt 4 a while do u find urself getting a little down or edgy?
ur b/f will have to accept that it is simply part of ur
chemical and physiological make up.
hopefully in time he will get used to it. but u could
try being discreet or less obvious about it so as not to
hurt him or make him feel cross with u.
i have to add a downer here.
compulsive flirts very often do not find true
happiness in life so maybe a slow down a little may help u.
as in all things there is a middle route.
take that one

God bless

Answer 4

I'm a compulsive flirt what should I do?
Em tough on that let's start by not flirting for a day!
then flirt again then leave it for two days and so on and eventually you'll be cured!.

Answer 5

listen, you really can control it. I got this hot neighbour(girl), she's a flirt and that time i didn't know she had a boyfriend and so it felt as if she was it for me, i mean she was like touching and all. Just like you. see, your boyfriend will kinda feel insecure, he might think that when he's away you might make a move on the other guy, meaning he'll lose his trust in you. and therefore break up. see when i came to know she already got a BF and that that's her nature, it was a lil heartbreaking and that's not good meaning i wouldn't like her company. Her boyfriend gets frustrated, nowadays i talk to her keeping a distance. Listen you wouldn't like it if he was like that. it would be hard but you can stop yourself if you tried. Adios amigos- boy that was long

Answer 6

"I've told him that it's not really something I can control"

Says it all really. So you can't control your flirting? So you have no control over yourself????

Just keep asking yourself why you need to be liked so much.
I guess at your age, it will stay with you because you like doing it.
Sounds like self-esteem problems.
It will never go away until you want it to and make an attempt to sort it out. All in your hands, all under your control (oh well)

Answer 7

i'm also a compulsive flirt but only with attractive men.
maybe you should try and tone it down just a little to an acceptable leel for your man. if you dont want to and you cannot meet a compromise then find another guy.

Answer 8

Girl, first off, you are who you are and have built your own personality based on what makes you comfortable and who you are in your own mind and skin.
I am the same as you and had same problems as you with not only my wife but everyone else in the past.
But you know what? I wouldn't change a thing!Cause when I did try for the ones who asked, I didn't feel like me and felt resentment towards the person wanting me to change myself.
They either get used to it or they don't.Nothing you do will be good enough of a change.Change one thing they will feel like they can change another and actually ask you to.Trust me I have lived it many times.
Their insecurity is just that theirs.They decided they liked you and wanted to be with you based on all that you are.So, To be expected to change it for them is wrong.Stick to your guns and be yourself.If they really love you then will take you for that without exception.You only get one life and sometimes that life has changes in who you share it with.So, if he don't want to take you for who you are and like being, then maybe he's not the one for the long haul.
Good luck, and above all, Just be "you" no matter what anyone thinks.

Answer 9

You need to mature honey. My guess is deep down you feel insecure and in need of approval especially from men. There is no problem with being friendly but you are sending out definite "come on" signals to other men and so of course your boyfriend is going to be upset. You need to get your issues under control because your behaviour is hurting someone you care about and he has told you that and you are undermining his feelings. Look deep inside yourself and see what it is that makes you such a compulsive flirt, counselling might help.

Answer 10

If you want to have a serious relationship stop all this baby and sweetie stuff. Doesn't look good in you b'friends eyes.Just curb the urge to flirt. It isn't fair to him and makes out like you are some kinda of ho. Don't go there if you can't possibly deliver your message as it will get in the wrong context from someone you are flirting with.

Answer 11

According to webster dictionary,flirting means to make love w/out serious intentions,play at love, jerky movement. Yes you can control it by acting decently in front of men. the truth is when you flirt to a man,you got is full attention thru his brain below his belt,ohh baby !!that is good for a short while.When you talk to a man using your intelligent,and kindness, you are getting a big score to him,thru his brain in his head down to his heart. Respect that is the best from a man.Admit it, you will be mad too if your boyfriend will flirt to other girls infront of you.