2006-12-18 09:19:44 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
just tell them the truth. not by words but by your actions.
it will be hard to convince them, but try and try.
be careful of bribering them like buying gifts, they may be get spoiled and you are not building love by doing so.
lasty, dont talk bad against their dad. they wont believe u or u will just make the situation hard for them who to believe.
2006-12-18 10:33:12 · answer #1 · answered by johannea 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Coming from a split home growing up, my mother did the same thing. She would bash my father all the time. All I can say is, yes there were times I did not trust my father because of the things my mother said. However my Dad was just opposite and never said a thing about my mother not even, don't believe anything you hear!" He just loved us, and his actions spoke louder than words so when we got older we could see my mother was just all talk. Just love your children and let your actions do nothing that makes them feel unloved. You shouldn't have to convince your children to like you.
2006-12-18 17:29:40 · answer #2 · answered by cliffhanger 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know it is really hard to handle. But never, NEVER, bash their Dad back. They will see it for themselves someday. If you decide to sink to his level, they will lose respect for you. I have had to bite my tongue so many times. I wanted to just spew out the truth about their lying, cheating, lazy father but I couldn't stand the thought of hurting my children. They just want reassurance that you are not this horrible person that he makes you out to be. So hold them tight, and love them and pray all the time. Be there for them when he lets them down and he will because he is already disappointing them by the way he talks about you. Hang in there, it isn't easy and it hurts like hell when they repeat vicious lies but they are your babies. You will never hurt him by bashing him back but you will hurt your children. So, take the high road, tell them that you love them and hug them a lot. Good luck!
2006-12-18 22:06:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have a real relationship with lots of love, you don't have to worry about your daughters believing such lies. SO don't worry, your girls will still love you. Just explain what is and is not true if they ask, don't get defensive, just explain it to them. Soon they will see their father is trying to work them against you. He will lose in the end
2006-12-18 17:27:27 · answer #4 · answered by 1 Supermom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all they will always do that men are mean bad people when it comes to divorce and kids. I just went through it and he did the same thing eventually my kids found out the real way things are and that hes the horses @#$ so bare with it and just always let your kids know you love them till the end and they are the most important thing in your life.
2006-12-18 17:51:58 · answer #5 · answered by alfbeta 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just prove to them with your actions that they really are lies. And don't be like their father and talk bad about him in front of them. I hated and still hate when my divorced parents talk bad about each other in front of me.
2006-12-18 17:26:17 · answer #6 · answered by mommyem 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Refuse to get involved. By not attacking him you show a bigger side, by showing them a better side you make them question what they might be hearing.
The gift example from someone else is definatly true. Compensating by buying them things is a short fix to a long problem and not a very good one either.
2006-12-18 18:54:09 · answer #7 · answered by anubistac 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be the better person. Do not stoop to his level. By doing this hopefully it will show your girls that he is the one telling lies about you. Ask a friend to hold you to your promise of being the better person and not let you stoop to his level.
2006-12-19 06:51:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
when i went through a divorce,i asked the same thing.i was told just to be the rock for them always be there.a big rock never moves and never changes,always consistent.dont change.they now the do's and dont's .my kid now knows what to expect and all the name calling and abuse from the other side he has seen for himself and has formed his own opinion,chalk up 1 for the men out there who do loved there kid and take care of the responsibility
2006-12-18 18:23:40 · answer #9 · answered by themanfromdownthestreet 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my mom bad mouthed my dad and I took her side. The thing though that years later, as an adult... I respected my dad. Never once did he say anything bad about my mom. Never. I respect that. I am sure he wanted to... I still respect that and my mom still bad mouths my dad and now it makes me think less of her
2006-12-18 18:05:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋