Do I follow my heart or should I listen to my brain? Last night I was a question that could possibly changed my life for ever. I was asked to be married. I have wanted to settle down and be married in the next couple years. But I set standards in which I would take it slow and really get to know the person. But then I meet Mike. Mike is this incredible guy who I just met about 3 months ago. I was depressed for a long time and then being with Mike I was able to be happy again. I saw possibly in the future and the potential to succeed in life. He made me feel that way. I have only gone out with him for about a week and there is still that newness feeling. My head is telling me to take it slow. But my heart is telling me a whole different story. I have been unhappy for over a year. But I meet this guy who can make even the gloomist day seem sunny and make a bad semester of school into a better semester next year. He makes me happy. He understands me like no one else can and I understand him. I care for him. I know I should get to know him better but I have fallen for him. Even though it was really early in the morning when he asked, I wonder if he is serious. He didn't have a ring but you don't need a ring (even though it shows you are serious).Should I listen to my heart or listen to my brain?
2006-12-18 05:31:16 · 18 answers · asked by scrawford684 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Make what you heart says!
For example: My parents married 7weeks after they first met and they're still happy married for 35years now.
Good luck!!!
2006-12-18 05:34:57 · answer #1 · answered by anna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
O-k, I can understand your feelings and believe me when all them feelings are strong it makes you feel better than ever.But, We all know that all of us get these feelings, especially in the very beginning of a relationship.Truth is girl,if it was possible for them feelings to stay that strong forever,there would be no need for separations and divorces.But in reality, those feelings change alot of the time because after we spend enough time with someone things happen and we learn more about the person behoned all them fuzzy feelings of perfection.
Look,You have only known him for a short period of time and even though you think "hes the one" give him time to prove it for the long haul.If after a year or more it all seems to still be peaches and cream,go ahead and take his offer for engagement and plan from there.But alot can happen from now and then that can either benefit you both or put an end to it. better to test these waters before making it a legal and most times,a very difficult situation for you both. You cant just expect your "hope" to be the best judge here.
2006-12-18 13:42:09 · answer #2 · answered by vmaxer85 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart. Just because you get engaged doesn't mean that you have to get married right away. This is where your brain comes in. Take it slow after the engagement, But listen to his heart as well. Sometimes the best things in life can be a compromise. Sometimes things come up when we least expect it, it's just how we deal with them that makes it wonderful or not.
2006-12-18 13:38:37 · answer #3 · answered by Karen A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that u have to listen to both I'm married my wife 98 days after first meeting her and i think that is the best decision i have ever made i feel more in love with her today than the first day we met. but i think this is the exception rather than the rule. so be careful but listen to your heart. by the way this was the second marriage for both of us and we are in are late 30's. and next September will be 5 yrs.
2006-12-18 15:05:02 · answer #4 · answered by kevincolorado 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in this case it isn't about choosing your heart or your brain. i know it's not the answer you are expecting but it's a life choice decision that can really modiy your future so you really have to take everything into account both what you feel and what you think. I'm sorry but it's the most i can say as for your choice it is yours alone and maybe ask people you are conected to but don't expect a compleate stranger to suggest more ideas that the ones above for it is YOUR life
2006-12-18 13:38:10 · answer #5 · answered by chofap 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will thank yourself later in life if you take things slowly now. I've been divorced for 3 yrs now and I really wish when I was younger I would have taken my time. Yes, you should follow your heart but listen to your gut feelings too. If something feels right it probably is....but if something feels a little off...proceed with caution.
Either way, I wish you the best!
2006-12-18 13:35:57 · answer #6 · answered by Just a Girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Use the body part with a brain: your head. If it's meant to be, time will strengthen it. Don't agree to marry a man you've known only 90 days! If he doesn't have a ring, he's not serious. Listen to your brain!
2006-12-18 13:34:01 · answer #7 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How will u decide when people are going to give you their opinions? You will still be confused. I say follow your brain.
Have you met his parents?
Does he have siblings?
Whats his favorite color, food, pastime, etc?
There are lots of things that you don't know about him. IF you can handle the negative things that you will find out about him, then go ahead. Follow your brain. Foollow your brain. Follow your brain.
Has he ever been convicted? on drugs? finished high school? job? own transportation? own home/apt? any STDs?
You need to email me so that we can talk.
2006-12-18 13:39:30 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to do both. I would let him know that you feel he is the guy for you but you want to wait till the 6 month mark to take the next step.
2006-12-18 13:34:30 · answer #9 · answered by Mike 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i personally think that you should date a guy for at least 4 months.... i think you should take it slow... are you sure you are not just getting over that unhappy feeling so everything feels wonderful? i think that you should tell him that you really love him, but you feel you should go out with him a little longer before you agree to anything concrete
2006-12-18 13:35:17 · answer #10 · answered by jessesangul987 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋