I've just started university, and my boyfriend and I have been together for about a month now. There is a girl on his course that lives in a house nearby and is in our social group - I'm not very close to her but he is. She's a nice girl except that she's very touchy feely to all of the guys in our group. It doesn't bother me that she does it to any of the other guys but why does she have to do it to my boyfriend?!?! I end up getting jealous and annoyed and take it out on him when I know this is definately not the thing to do...
What can I do? Should I confront her, even though it seems extreme to do so? Should I ask my boyfriend to tell her to stop touching her? Or should I just accept but possibly go mad from anger...
2006-12-18 03:46:05 · 22 answers · asked by abc123abc 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Tell her that you don't like her to touch your bf...but say it nice!!!
It seems it's very normal for her to touch friends so perhaps she just doesn't notice that she could hurt anyone...
2006-12-18 03:51:57 · answer #1 · answered by anna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the girl should keep on damn hands to herself............if she was touchin my man like that i punch her in the face'lol'.........not tellin you to do such a thing but i am a very possessive person and would fight for someone i love!!!!I know fighting doesn't solve anything though and would probably makes matter much worse so if i were you i would talk to your boyfriend about it and ask him how it makes him feel when she touches him and i would let him know how it make you feel and how it hurts your feelings then i would ask him if you and him could go and confront the girl about it together,tell her that it makes you uncomfortable and you would like it very much if she would keep on hands on the single guys and off of your man!!!!!!I know there are some girls out there and guys a like that are very touchy feely and half the time they probably don't even realize that they are touchy someone if just come naturally but if you feel that she he crossing the boundaries between what is right and wrong just tell her she may understand and even apologize for it..............good luck and i hope everything works out for you and your boyfriend!!!!
2006-12-18 04:00:04 · answer #2 · answered by Baybee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most likely the girl is just naturally touchy feely but if you have suspicion that she is a flirt and really trying to steal your boyfriend then you have a right to get jealous. I suggest talking to her in a calm matter and see what she says (Be Nice). Don't confront your boyfriend about this because any signs of jealosy then he might have second thoughts about you. Just approach this subject with the girl and if she reallly does want your boyfriend you have to trust him enough to hang out with her and not hook up with her behind your back. If you have any suspicion that she and him have done something then talk to your boyfriend but only once then if you have proof and he lies then break up with him because you deserve better. I hope I helped but don't become his stalker or that might just drive him away.
2006-12-18 04:04:36 · answer #3 · answered by ~Stephie~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your boyfriend, what you've seen, because trust me when I say some men do not notice, or take it as flirting. I remember when my sister was touching, and laughing at his jokes, she would act all casual with him, and it bothered me to no end, my mother was even wondering what was going on, when I confronted my boyfriend about it, he hadn't noticed, he never had girls around him when he was younger and finds himself unable to tell whether a girl is hitting/ flirting on/with him. He assured me that he loved me, and that i was the only one for him, which in times like this can be very reassuring.
So just let him know what you've seen, maybe he saw something else.
2006-12-18 03:53:24 · answer #4 · answered by Zig 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't you just HATE it when this happens? I know I do and what I usually do in a situation like this is first, I would tell my boyfriend to tell her to quit touching him and that usually works. But sometimes some chicks are just so stubborn! So when this happens you should confront her but make sure that it's in a classy way! And just tell her how you don't appreciate her touching on your boyfriend, and if she tries that, " Well he's my friend and I do that to all my friends" line, just say how disrespectful she is when she does that and ask how she would feel in your position. I hope that this helps and that she quits messing with your guy!
2006-12-18 04:02:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might want to talk to your boyfriend in case that he has not noticed, and let him know that you don't like what this other girl is doing and that you would like it if he talked to her to let her know that is not the right thing to do because of you and him dating, let him know that if he does not mind you talking to her then you would be glad just be civil about it and let her know that what she doing the other guys does not bother you but when she does it to your boyfriend you don't feel it is right and ask her to stop what she doing. Let her know that she would not want you to that if was her boyfriend. Obviously she is having problems with some limitations, maybe she is not aware what she is doing wrong. You don't have accept what you are not comfortable with. Just be sure when you do approach her that she not the type to want to bite your head off for being honest about what she is doing. There are some girls like that.
2006-12-18 03:59:45 · answer #6 · answered by gordonflames242003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your BF needs to handle the situation or you just end up looking like the jealous b*tch from hell. If you address it with him then he shouldn't have a problem telling her to back off. Of course guys wouldn't even ask - we'd just beat the living hell out of the dude that got touchy feely with our girl.
2006-12-18 03:49:57 · answer #7 · answered by Spugsy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you know, there are some girls who are like that....no matter how much anyone tells them, they either can't help it, or are doing it to get attention coz they think that's the only way any guy would ever pay attention to them.
You should definitely explain to your guy that her behaviour makes you uncomfortable (but do it calmly!) He can then explain it to her. If she was just genuinely being over-friendly, she would watch her behaviour. If she's the attention-getting type, chances are she won't stop & may continue just to tick you off. But if its the second case, I hope your guy has enough sense not to remain friends with someone that manipulative.
Whatever the outcome, you should tell your guy how you feel...if he's not doing anything to invite her attention, taking it out on him could seriously screw your relationship.
2006-12-18 03:56:23 · answer #8 · answered by Peace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell your boyfriend.
don't confront her about it until you let him know that it is bothering you because if you don't let him know it will bother him that you did it behind his back (trust me all guys are the same in the way they react towards things) then if he doesn't do anything about it, slip it in one day to her or one other the other people in your click. maybe they can get the message across to you. the girl should understand that the guy obviously likes YOU not her or he would have asked HER out. if this guy really cares about you he would make sure that this girl is not interested in him romantically and tell her to calm her little self down.
2006-12-18 03:56:22 · answer #9 · answered by x3holdaloverclose 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you BF knows how uncomfortable you feel about her, he should know to stay out of reach from her. He's not listening...instead of YELLING at him about it...talk to him. Also, let the girl know that even if she's touch feely with other guys,...tell her that she needs to reduce the touchiness with your boyfriend. HOPEFULLY she'll understand...she may be hard of hearing if it continues...keep telling her to "kindly" stop.
If that doesn't work...***** slap her! sorry...couldnt resist!
2006-12-18 03:59:13 · answer #10 · answered by Lucy_Goosy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your boyfriend about it, and don't get upset. If she is not doing it "just" with your boyfriend, you shouldn't get too worked up. She probably is just a girl that likes the attention from guys, and isn't necessarily after your man. If he is made aware that it makes you uncomfortable, its easy for him to subtly keep her at arm's length, and avoid you looking jealous.
2006-12-18 03:51:30 · answer #11 · answered by Ricardo Montalban 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋