we have being staying together for seven month, his kind but not as caring as i expected. he even beat me up when i did nothing to him he letter ask me to leave his house when i refuse, he left the house for me that he will only come back when i leave, i finally left and he letter call and text me that he want me back, i was jobless then now i work, i even treaten him that it was over and he almost died of thinking which made me feel guilty and call him for reconceliation, we are back again but am afraid if his present actions are not just make believe for he sound so caring and wanting me to marry him. wont he change after we are married? he dont like assisting financially, that does not bother me much but am not sure if he is my kind of man and i truly love him , should i accept his proporsals.
2006-12-17 20:24:41 · 12 answers · asked by BEKES M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He is a pretender, since he managed to hurt you and chased you out of the house why cant you do the same to him, he is just wasting your time and making you lose other chances somewhere else, and top of that you are not willing to marry him, he is comparing notes somewhere else. Call it a quit that is my advise. Keep yourself for sometime then find someone else more pleasant to you, why live a worrying life yet still young?
2006-12-17 20:40:58 · answer #1 · answered by ConRob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If someone will physically or emotionally abuse a girlfriend, they will certainly not hesitate to do the same to her once she is his wife. His abusive behavior WILL continue, he will not change. He doesnt like you assisting financially? This is the same abusive pattern. These men don't want their girlfriends/wives working and out in the world where they may complain or get advice from co-workers. They want them at home so they can control their every move. Also it keeps them from having their own money so they have the financial independence to leave them when things get rough. Now you are wondering what to get him for the Holidays? No gift will make someone believe you love them. Abusive people don't really love anyway. Their emotional pleasure comes from control. Best to just get him something he likes or cook him his favorite meal. Something no more special than you would get a good friend. It sounds to me you probably have low self esteem. I would suggest you contact an abuse hotline and ask for their advice. Reguardless, you should never marry a person you are not sure you love.
2016-05-23 03:57:22 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is abusive and a lazy bum with no job... find a non defective one! he is going to beat you again for no reason and he is not going to change over night he would need therapy and it can take years for results so unless you're willing and he is willing i'd say get out of the situation fast before you end up beaten or worst dead.
2006-12-17 20:29:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
After a "#" of years living together, you can consider yourselves "married",-not legally. I lived with a girlfriend for the "first & last" time cause it ruined the relationship, we fought alot & I felt like I was "married" at the wrong time so she moved out. (but as of you, if everything goes right in the future, then you're both in luck.)
2006-12-17 20:45:25 · answer #4 · answered by strange-artist 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please get out of this destructive relationship while you still can. I lived with a man for 10 years, only to leave him when he finally wanted to get married. I am now married to the most wonderful, loving and caring man in the world. Yours is out there, don't settle for this schmuck you are with now.
2006-12-17 20:29:01 · answer #5 · answered by alstar333 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem, just in not as a high scale problem. I would folllow your instincts, and think that if you DONT want to be with this man forever then don't accept.
2006-12-19 13:04:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u know what he will not change after u get married he will become worst... he will beat u and calls u names... he is not a good guy...
tell him.. u are not right for me and i am sorry i can;t marry u.. u should do that on text because if u do that in front of him he will beat u and maybe rap u...
2006-12-17 20:29:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely. He is the domanint force of your life. You need to let him do his own thing. He really does care about you, he just has a hard time showing it. You should be begging him and try offering yourself to him and tell him he can stick it anywere. TYhat sould smooth things over really good. Good Luck
2006-12-17 20:30:12 · answer #8 · answered by Mr. Nice Guy 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Is this a real question?
I hope this is a joke, but in case it's not, get out of this relationship. I couldn't even call this a relationship. Get help, you needs lots of it.
2006-12-17 20:33:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if i were on your shoes i will give him another chance to improve that he changed before your answer about his proposal
do not rush in such situation
2006-12-17 20:37:48 · answer #10 · answered by pussycat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋