Jealous of my girlfriend's ex boyfriend?

Question

Hey,
ive been dating my girlfriend for like 6 months now and she says she loves me more than shes ever loved any one, but she broke up with her boyfriend of 3 1/2 years about 3 months before we started dating. everytime i think about her ex in any way, it really upsets me. they dont even ever speak anymore and she swears she hates him. im not sure if im jealous or what my deal is, but whenever i think about him being with her and her saying she loved him it drives me crazy...is this normal? what do i do??

Answer 1

No this is not normal.

She's with you now. Don't let your insecurity break up your relationship.

You need to trust her. If you can't, then you may need some kind of therapy to work on trust issues.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

Jealous Of Girlfriends Ex

Answer 4

Of course it's normal to feel that way. No one likes picturing the person they love with someone else. The thing you have to remember is that she picked you. That should make you feel special, and if anyone is jealous it's her ex. I know it's hard to not think about this guy since they dated for so long, but really all you can do is keep reminding yourself of who she's with now. Also, you probably shouldn't bring this up to her more than once because I could see how she might interpret it as you accusing her of still loving him or something like that. The feeling will go away with time.

Answer 5

Males are territorial. We should have a right to be jealous! The thing is though, women just don't agree. And they want us to be so sensitive. The best thing to do is just bottom line the situation. She's with me, she loves me, and she's trustworthy. So forget about the smuck.

Whatever you do, don't bring the guy up at all to her. There was only once where you should know about the past duds. When she brought the convo up on a date, or you asked about them on a date. You got the info, I hope, on what they did wrong so you don't, now drop the subject from ever coming up again with her. Show her that you have confidence. Bringing him up in conversations when your in your jealous rage will just reopen old wounds and drive her interest level in you down. She'll think to herself, oh god, another psychotic boyfriend. Before you know it, your heart will be on boothill with her past lovers, while making you even more jealous when she's with a new guy. Like the famous line from the movie "The Godfather" says, "Forget about it."

Remember, and this to all guys in this situation, if you can't handle the fact that the girl cuddled up to you has a baggage of previous relationships, marry an ugly girl for the rest of your life or join the priesthood.

Answer 6

Your good bro, he is sweating "you" right now way more than you think. Look, jealousy is just a human thing, just don't get crazy on her, don't even bother her about it and after some time it will go away. They had a 3yr thing, that's a long time just to up and say "Oh well F--k it". She isn't even talking to him, you good. Were is your confidence man? She with YOU! Not him anymore.
If your a real man you know you can keep that girl. Good Luck!

Answer 7

its normal to a degree. but it sounds like you may have gone over the borderline here.......exactly how often do you think about him? and if you think about him frequently--why is that? especially if she never brings him up or expresses any desire to be with him or see him or talk to him. does she ever compare you to him? doesnt sound like this is the case. i dont know if your jealous as much as you are obsessed. you need to allow her to have her own history, just like you have yours. shes obviously made you the choice of her present and her future--leave her past alone. its possible that when youve been with her longer than the 3 1/2 years she was with him that you will then feel like your "better" than him. but really, i dont see how this relationship will last this long if you dont get over this fixation, cuz sooner or later its going to manifest itself in the way you treat her. dont let that happen or you'll likely lose her.PS: every woman you meet is going to have a romantic history that doesnt involve you.

Answer 8

Your messages definitely helped me through my breakup. About a year and a half ago my lover of four years and I broke up and I desperately wanted ex back, and because of some of the advice you had given, I was able to! Time went on and things were back to the way they were, and were not together anymore, and it’s okay. I wouldn’t have been able to go through the realization process had I not read these, as well. Your messages were very beneficial to me, though I don’t need them anymore, they were always appreciated. Thank you so much.

Answer 9

Texting lets you control the tone and establish what kind of conversation you want to have. Learn here https://tr.im/l9RIB
This is probably the most important part. With texting, you can stop and think about what you want to say to your ex at each step of the way. Instead of reacting emotionally, you can take your time, figure out the right thing to say (I’ll give you most of it), and be strategic with your ex without saying something that you’ll regret.

Answer 10

Jealousy's COMPLETELY normal!! But remember, she chose YOU. YOU'RE her guy now, so forget about him. Plus, a strong root to a healthy relationship is TRUST, so trust your girlfriend with this.