So, A mother dropped her son off at my church a few months ago, and asked our pastor to find him a home. He came to me because he knows I have the resources and that I love children. He has been living with me for a while now, he is 4 and he loves playing with my 3 yr old triplets, they are already like brothers. I am thinking about adopting him and making him my own. I am white and he is black. I have got mixed opinions from people on if they think its okay for me to raise him. What are your feelings?
I esp would like black peoples feelings on this.
I love him, he loves me, I can finacially take care of him and send him to good schools, I send him to a montessori school where its pretty diverse, and I also have black friends with children that he can play with/relate too.... I think I can give him everything he needs, but I just want to know why a lot of black people tend to think I am wrong for doing this?
2006-12-17 15:20:58 · 16 answers · asked by eric 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I say adopt him. At the end of the day it doesn't matter what race you are just as long as you can love that child and take good care of him all is well. And it sounds like your not trying to take him from his culture but you are trying to give him a good home thats full of love. Don't look at his race look at his heart. I know a white family that adopted a black little boy and the little boy is fine. I see it like this the people who have something to say if their black have they offered to open up their homes to the child? Chances are no! If you love him and he loves you thats all that matters. Good luck and God Bless You!
2006-12-17 15:28:51 · answer #1 · answered by Ms. Lise 4 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I apologize, as I know you are looking for opinions from african-americans, but I just have to commend you for taking a child (regardless of color) into your home, loving him and making him a part of your family. I can't imagine why someone would have a problem with that. I think at this point it would do more damage to NOT adopt him (he loves all of you!). He doesn't seem to care, so why should anyone else? Go on and adopt him. People always have something to say about something. You know in your heart what is right for him.
2006-12-17 23:26:24 · answer #2 · answered by julesl68 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think anyone who adopts any child no matter what sex/race or anything is wonderful. The child just needs someone to care and love him/her like it deserves. It doesn't matter that you are white and he is black because he will grow up knowing that someone wanted him and he was loved and taken care of. He may grow up and be asked or teased why his Dad/brothers are a different color but what would be the difference if he was asked lets say, about the color of his eyes or if he is too skinny or too chubby or anything else. Do what your heart tells you and love that child like he is your own and you as a family will overcome everything! God Bless and Merry Christmas!
2006-12-17 23:29:39 · answer #3 · answered by Jen 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So what he's a child and he needs a loving home. race should not be the issue , but do you love him and are you willing to give him the same as you do youre own children. I am sure that you will so for the adoption and love him with all youre heart. God bless you, we need more people llike you in this world. By teh way I am white.
2006-12-17 23:28:38 · answer #4 · answered by karen v 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although I am a african-american, I cannot speak for all of african-american people, I can speak as a single parent raising 3 girls. As long as your heart is pure and you love this little boy, his race or yours does not matter. You are an adult and he is a child in need of love and a home. If you allow what others think to cloud what you know is a good thing, then you deprive this child of someone who knows him and loves him. As long as he is raised in an enviroment where he sees faces that look like his he will be fine. I know that may sound naive but as a parent skin color does not matter when it comes to loving a child who needs it.
2006-12-18 00:25:23 · answer #5 · answered by monique 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We are all the same in the eye of God. If you take care the kid well, I 100% believe that there will be so many lucks you'll have. Since I have a daughter, I realize that a kid is a bless, I realize that she is very small and alone, and me as the mother has to guide and protect her in this cruel world. I have responsibility to teach and prepare her facing all of facts that will happen.
I have a friend who adopt a kid and taking care of the kid as his own kid, and amazingly his life become better. Furthermore, he adopt another kids, and his life is richer and richer. He says that kids is the future of this world. He just would like to prepare a better world by preparing good humans. What he has now is a message from God to help more people.
May God always bless him.
2006-12-18 00:03:25 · answer #6 · answered by Chabilla 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am not black, but I feel that it's more mportant for a child to have a loving home with a supportive family. I am not dismissing the importance of cultural awareness, but if a child is unloved and hungry, well, I wonder if he would care where he came from. You stated that you are sending him to a culturally diverse school, etc. so it sounds like you are very supportive of whom he is.
Best luck to you.
2006-12-17 23:29:27 · answer #7 · answered by Abby 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not African American, but I feel that race, ethnicity, religion etc-these things are not the basis of being an excellent parent. What is deemed in the best public interest for the child-having parents of the same race/ethnicity/religion etc who may or may not be excellent parents-or someone who is an excellent parent of a different race. My answer is the excellent parent.
The only more acceptable (as society would deem it) thing for the child would be if he was guaranteed to get excellent parents of the same race, versus excellent parents of a differing race.
2006-12-17 23:33:38 · answer #8 · answered by nikirr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont see a problem with it at all. There are lots of kids waiting to be adopted and I commend you for looking into adoption. All thats counts is that your going to make a child very happy and provide them with the best life that you know how. I may not be black but to me color does not matter. hats off to you.
2006-12-18 00:45:11 · answer #9 · answered by Kim 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's better for a child to have a loving home than to be in foster care their entire childhood and be switched around never really having a home just because the would be adoptive parents weren't the right "color" or sexual orientation (of course, that's another topic!).
2006-12-17 23:32:39 · answer #10 · answered by First Lady 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋