Could you ever forgive your partner for being unfaithful to you?

Question

By unfaithful i mean anything from kissing someone else (more than on the cheek of course) to having a full on affair? What would be your reason for forgiving or not forgiving them?

Thanks to you all for your answers so far. I'm sorry to those who have been hurt in the past and i thank you for sharing your feelings.

Answer 1

Once a cheater always a cheater. There is no way that you can ever trust that person again. How could you? Since trust should be a huge part of a relationship it wont work. That thought will always be in your head.

Answer 2

It depends on your relationship and what you mean by 'forgiving'. If you are saying 'forgiving' in the sense of staying with that person, it is possible, but you have to examine your history with this person, and the circumstances that led to the act. Were you going through some rough times, did you mate actively seek out someone and start this fling (however brief it was)? Was there something missing in the relationship that one or both of you could have/should have done to fix it before it got to this point? If your mate can be honest and tell you why it happened, you can fogive an move forward in the relationship. But honestly ask yourself if you are the type of person who will bring this up at every future argument, or would this be in the back or your mind whenever your mate came home late? If so, you owe it to yourself and him/her to move on. You can forgive and maintain a friendly relationship if that is what you guys want. Or you can learn from whatever mistakes were made in this relationship and move on. If this person is just a cheater, let him/her go. I tried once holding on to someone just to show the other woman that I could. Our relationship was downhill from that point on and I was miserable (I don't know about him, he was still cheating).This is a tough question. I am now happily married and I know that if my hubby strayed, I would be hurt, but would work to fix our marriage b/c he is not a cheater by nature (been together 1 years and I have never had reason to suspect anything!), so there would have been circumstances in our relationship that led him to it.

Answer 3

My fiancee had been seeing someone for three months behind my back before she finally dumped me a week or so ago, and I REALLY don't know if I forgive her or not. There's part of me that does and will always love her and would do anything to go back to the way things were, and there's part of me that says "it's not like it was an accident or a mistake, she knew damn well what she was doing; being unfaithful and lying to me about it. if she gave a **** about me in the first place, she wouldn't have done it." It's just really confusing, you know? But, I know that, like someone else up there said, I can't do any of that until I get away from this and move on.

Answer 4

There's a big difference between kissing someone on the cheek and having a full blown affair.

I believe it has to do with their history. Their track record should give you a clue as to how you would treat the near indiscretion or if they had a full-blown affair.

There are situations that will occur where someone might get a kiss on the cheek from someone for any number of reasons. None of which would be compelling evidence of any kind of improper behavior .

It's tough to give any specific examples or reasons why you would for give or not forgive them, but I think the bottom line is going to be what you feel and how emotionally strong you are.

Answer 5

I could forgive him, but I couldn't stay with him. I know that in my heart I wouldn't want to be touched by him or be near him. I would think he was nasty and disgusting. All the intimacy would be lost. Relationships are built on trust, once that is gone the foundation crumbles. I know that everyone is different. Maybe I am just weak, but there is no way I could stay married to someone that I found repulsive. When I would look at him, I don't know that I would see him. I would see images and just knowing that the border was crossed would hurt me. So I would have no choice but to leave.

Answer 6

I will be honest here I WOULD forgive Laura if she was unfaithful because we all make mistakes in life and neither of us are exempt from that so in time I would forgive her no issues at all, and anyway I cant hold a grudge against the woman I love,. theres no way.

Mitch

Answer 7

The Reason For Forgiving...

1- She's your life partner made just for you and she will be always with you.
2- She will always with you when you will be sad or happy.
3- Your forgiveness will make her heart melt.
4- She is always behind you to support you when you are in trouble.
5- Mistake are made by human beings only.
6- She is the one whom you love.
7- If you will forgive her, her realisation will make you great and she will feel your goodness.

The Reason For Not Forgiving...

Your proud, Your hard heart, Your weakness, Your mistake, Your dudness and Your selfishness.

Answer 8

no matter what you mean by being unfaithful NO I could not ever forgive because there is no reason to be doing that with anyone else but you...

Answer 9

I could forgive, but i wont forget. How to forget?
It really depend on how much you love this cheater and how much he/she regrets it.
There will be a long way to go to start trusting the cheater again; lots of arguments and tears and maybe even counseling session ..but it can happen if you both really want to save the relationship

Answer 10

No. in the event that they are untrue they have lost the privileged and believe of being with me. i could forgive the guy to the ingredient to being a pal, yet not greater. Years down the line if that guy or woman has remained in my existence, and has regained my believe by using being a solid pal. i'm going to evaluate yet another relationship.