what's your opinion? Will this marriage work?

Question

I had a girl who flirted with me for eleven weeks, even calling my house and hanging up when I answered the phone. She started talking about me to co-workers. She was told she could not date me by her boss (Doctor) even though we both really had crushes on each other. When I saw her again ten months later she just sat there and stared at me. I found out after that she got pregnant a couple of months after i asked her out and she got told she could not date me, then moved inb with him and got engaged and now is married (after the baby came) She was 4 months pregnant and engaged when she was staring at me. I have been told she really thought I was great and thought she would marry me. Have been told she still has feelings for me. Do marriages work when two people have barely known each other a year and a baby or pregnancy basically led to the marriage? I am trying to forget her but it is hard. I guess I hope her marriage fails even though that is selfish but really wonder.

Answer 1

I doubt if this marriage is going to work if two barely known people are married with children. And, they got married because she became pregnant and that was the "right thing to do".
I have a friend I met through someone mutural and we began dating. I thought everything was going great. He was on and off with a girl he knew since high school. (I am 29 and he is about 32. This was about 7 years ago.)
Anyway, he got back with her, and, two weeks later, she found out she was pregnant. Broke everything off with me and ended up marrying her a month later! She miscarried, but, three months after that, ended up pregnant. What happened to this marriage? Well, two kids later, within a 32 month period, they have been seperated on and off and then they finally divorced.
You see, marrying someone because they became pregnant is not always the answer. Sometimes, you end up getting pregnant by men (or pregnated women) you realize was a big mistake.
So, no, I do not think this marriage is going to work. She is too busy wanting to get next to you and probably could care less about her husband.
Personally, I would not get involved with her. I would move on. I am not saying that she has a lot of baggage because of the kids, but, given the fact that she only got married because she had gotten pregnant is not good.
Keep trying to forget her. Or, think about her, her kid(s), her husband, her family and the fact of your job and /or career and see where that would lead you.
Walk away.

Answer 2

oh boy... for your sake i hope her marriage to this guy works. ... what is wrong with you? I hope that it is only that you are probably too young to understand lasting love and marriage. If you marry her you forever will have to deal with her ex assuming this could ever even happen... at least until the baby is 18. Do you need this type of really for the next 18 years of your life?... Then you will also be raising a baby who is not your own. Just because someone has a strong physical attraction and maybe even is a nice person, does not mean it is right for you. You also should not encourage her with more stares and avoid her at all costs. Become a real solid man who can stand firm on life values- Allow her to work at making her marraige work. There is a baby's mommy and daddy at stake here. Let her go... there should be many girls in your life before you marry. Dont partake in breaking her marriage. And you ... during the next few years take time and build yourself into a strong man with good values and charactor. Make yourself proud of who you are and do not give in to a relationship like you are considering. Forget it. Go to your local book store and look for Dr Laura Slesinger's books on relationships. I think she wrote the Ten Stupid Things Men Do To Mess Up Their Lives, as the book that followed her NYTimes best seller, The Ten Things Women Do to Mess Up Their Lives. Read them and take care of you. You dont even have to buy them... Just have a seat in the store. Forget her and if you like tell her to make the realtionship work that she has married into. If you don't ,forget her you will be headed for a difficult future.

Answer 3

I would suggest walking away at this point - just so that you aren't caught up in a mess if her marriage does fall apart. It is possible that the marriage will last but I know plenty of people who are in the middle of divorces because they got married for the same reason.

If it is meant to be down the road, she'll find a way to get in touch with you.

Answer 4

You are hurt, that's always a natural reaction.....According to statistic I just looked this up how interesting, marraiges that are quick within 6 months, and second marraiges are at the top of the list, for highest divorce rates...... This may make you feel better, however your hurt feelings are masking your ability to see the big picture. Why would you want to be with a woman like this?

Answer 5

Any marriage can work if two people really work hard at it. Instead of wishing her marriage fails you should wish that she would really work on it. I wouldn't want to be with anyone who would leave a marriage to be with me that would make them a cheater. Instead of thinking about yourself think about her husband and child. She sounds a bit obsessive and flaky if she can jump in bed with the next dude so quickly when she is infatuated with someone else. I would wonder about her integrity if she is married and still looking at you.

Answer 6

Why does her boss have anything to say about anything? I would not marry anyone who would listen to her boss about personal matters. I would not marry anyone who has a baby by another father. Just too much crap.

Answer 7

It doesn't matter if anyone else thinks it will work. Only what she and her husband think. Do the right thing and forget about her. Find someone else.

Answer 8

That is a question you will always wonder about. Any chance the baby could be yours?

Answer 9

Leave this situation alone. Move on and find someone less complicated.

Answer 10

Forget this girl - she has a lot of problems.