The Most Confusing Girl I've Met?

Question

I've been friends with this girl for quite some time, and a few months ago I finally got the courage to ask her out on a date. However right before our date, she called me to tell me that she would rather just continue to be friends. I was a bit bitter about this but I quickly got over it and to this day we have continued to be very good friends.

However there are many situations where it seems like she may very well like me more than just a friend, and I've had this verified by some of her other close friends. The problem is that she can be incredibly shy when it comes to boys, and I highly doubt she'd ever approach me and tell me how she feels. If I were to approach her and tell her what's been going through my head, and it turns out that she doesn't like me then that wouldn't look terribly good on me socially, having been rejected by her before.

What are some ways I could continue being good friends with her but drop subtle hints I like her more, just to maybe get her courage up.

Answer 1

Tell her! Just be honest. Tell her your feelings for her first. Tell her how special she is to you and what it is you like about her.
If you are uncomfortable doing that, try giving her physical hints. Look her right in the eyes when you speak. Maintain eye contact for a little longer then normal when you are smiling at her. Don't say anything, just look into her eyes and smile at her for a few seconds. Touch her arm casually while you're speaking, or pat her hand. If she is very shy, chances are she is not used to people touching her so go slow. The key to this trick is to always be respectful. You don't want it to seem like you are just trying to cop a feel. Do stuff for her, too. Not big things, just stuff like getting the door for her. Don't worship her, but show her how much pleasure you get from her company. Compliment her on how she looks in a nice way.She needs to know what you are feeling is genuine. I assume it is genuine, since if you were just looking for a roll in the hay, so to speak, you probably wouldn't bother asking.
The most important thing to remember about shy girls is that they are afraid or self-concious. I used to be one of them, so I know. It might take a little longer, but she may need to learn to trust you.
This is going to sound like a terrible analogy,and there is no insult intended, but try to approach her like you would a wild animal that you want to tame. They are afraid of you and have to get used to you. Be patient and go slow. All good things are worth waiting for.

Answer 2

Well women are confusing period, regardless of the situation, so dont feel so bad about misunderstanding where she or the 2 of you might stand. Sometimes flirting is just 2 tempting, its in our nature 2flirt, women love 2 be flattered, even when are intentions are no further than this. However, it can also be a good indication that she may have developed feelings or an interest 4you over this period of time. She quite honestly might be unsure of herself, and not so much unsure of you. So dont be confused by that. If shes still in the picture the 2 of you obviously have a connection, which is usally where a relationship starts, with chemistry. But starting off as a friends is a huge advantage 2you, the best relationships can start from this. BUT, it can also sometimes ruin a really good friendship if you pursue it further than that and things dont work out. So u have 2 ask yourself...is it worth the risk?
The best advice I can offer is rather not 2drop hints or "ease" in2 the situation, be forward and upfront about how you're feeling. Thats how you would want her 2 be with you, right? Bold takes initiative. A man who knows what he wants and isn't intimated by going after it is an attractive quality.
You can tell her exactly what you've told us.... if you're good friends she'll appreciate your honesty and respect it, no matter where u stand. If she gives u the cold shoulder or starts the whole "maybe, maybe not type thing and just acts iffy..... then she's playing games and u shouldn't want 2 waste your time with her 2 begin with. But dont 2nd guess yourself, if you're not comfortable with who you are u cant expect her 2 be comfortable around you. You dont wanna think back on this 3years from now and wonder "what might have been" do you...?
Good luck!

Answer 3

she obviously likes you, but is too shy to actually have a boyfriend. get her a present for Christmas. not like expensive jewelry or anything, but maybe her favorite candy bar and put it in her locker. just be good to her and eventually she will open up.

Answer 4

well just be friendly i guess, don't stop being her friend even if she doesnt like you, she did say she just wanted to be friends so maybe you should try and move on.....and watch "just friends" it might help

Answer 5

you are young and learn how to listen...it will come with age. The more mistakes that you make with girls you will learn

Answer 6

honestly (its risky but she will prob. be blown away)
if you know she likes you just one day kiss her. then see what she says. if she gets mad, then that sucks for you but it worked for me sooo

Answer 7

just grow a pair and talk to her about it. if your wrong then your wrong. ta heck with it.

Answer 8

oh geez...thats like me =(....