she has been in pieces about this for months, she is nearly 9 and petrified of me or her dying, is there any quick way to stop this??
2006-12-17 09:31:24 · 23 answers · asked by me again 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
As a mum who's petrified of death I can tell you that the best way I found to cope with it, was to read Illusions by Richard Bach. Every time I get into a panic attack I read it and puts my mind at rest. When my child became curious about death, I didn't want her to go through the same as me, so I explained in my own words the meaning of the book, life spans, bettering ourselves, not to be afraid of the ultimate path, but to embrace it as a new adventure.
Please try hard to get your little girl out of it, it has affected me most of my life, and when I was little my mum just kept saying that I'd grow out of it, I never did! It is the worst phobia as it is the ultimate one. Read the book please, I wish you both the very best of luck.
2006-12-17 12:59:29 · answer #1 · answered by damari_8 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Presuming that there is no actual reasons she is thinking this, ie illness etc ... or that you have lost someone close? If none of these apply, I would just assure her that you are both healthy and well and that there is no reason for her to worry as you both have many years yet to live. Explain that most people live until they are 80!!! Also tell her that she must start thinking nice thoughts, as nice thoughts always make the bad thoughts go away! Something has obviously triggered this off, and perhaps you should ask her why she thinks this!! If you get no break through, I suggest you take her to see someone, as this is something you definately have to sort out. My daughter when she was 10 came up one day asking about death!! We chatted a bit and I was trying to make it seem not so bad .. ie a better place, heaven etc, and she turned to me and said ' it sounds like a nice adventure'!! Perhaps at a later date, once you have rooted the problems, explain that heaven is there for the good people to enjoy a peacefullife! I hope she gets over this soon!! Goodluck
2006-12-17 10:38:25 · answer #2 · answered by lynne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no quick way, I'm afraid. She's just reached that time of life where one becomes aware of one's mortality. All you can do as a parent is reassure her, and tell her to be careful. It is very sad, heartbreaking for a parent, but then again being a parent is the hardest job in the world.
Sorry if this answer doesn't reassure you, but good luck anyway!
2006-12-17 11:40:24 · answer #3 · answered by Gerbil 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has she seen something on tv, or overheard a confersation about someone that has actually died and didnt understand what was being said, at that age children worry about thing's that may not be the problem but an underlying problem that she may have , the best you can do is have her talk to someone , find out what triggered this off and then you might get to the source, best of luck , poor little child , but she will get over this . good luck
2006-12-17 10:00:55 · answer #4 · answered by MILLION DOLLAR QUESTION 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she could be feeling very insecure at the moment. Is there something else worrying her? It Might be a good idea to try and find out. Keep on giving her lots of love and reassurance. Good luck and I hope she gets over this soon.
2006-12-17 09:42:48 · answer #5 · answered by mullitover 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her never to be afraid of death. Death is not something to be afraid of but something to look forward to as death means that all our family will always be together in a happy place. Tell her this place that we will go to when we are very very old, is the most beautiful place you will ever see, it has the most beautiful trees and flowers and clearest waters, just everything is so beautiful. But in the mean time she is too young to go to that special place and so is mummy, so lets concentrate in having a great and happy life in the world that we live in now. Hope that helps.XXX
2006-12-17 11:32:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not real uncommon. She just needs lots of reassurance from you that although everyone dies SOMEDAY, you and her have a lot of living to do yet. This is typically a phase and will pass. If it gets too bad you may get her a check up with your family doctor. Tip him off in advance so he can have a little speech ready for her too. Best wishes.
2006-12-17 09:40:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Children of 9 dont need counceling, its a normal thought process, she must be normal and bright, just let her work through it, my son was exactly the same at the same age, its just part of realising her surroundings. Tell her it's very unusual for children to die in this country, we hav clean water and food etc, and teach her to understand where the dangers lie, like crossing the road and why we have to do it safely.
2006-12-17 10:04:12 · answer #8 · answered by My name's MUD 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't tell her that it won't because it could and that would screw her up royally. Be honest tell her that death is part of life and something we all have to deal with. The best way to deal with it is not to worry about it and instead get as much enjoyment out of the life you do have making the most of the time with the people you love. Don't worry about things that you can't control.
2006-12-17 09:37:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
the big question here is why is she afraid of dying or you dying? if you know why then it is a lot esyer to reasure her that you are not going to die, at least not now. explain to her that every one will die some time but that it is not some thing to be afraid of. tell her that with medical care people live a lot longer. and that some people live to over 100 years old.
2006-12-17 12:28:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋