Qualify as abuse?

Question

My parents provide food, shelter and clothing for me, but I have been hit, screamed at, and pushed. Not on a day to day basis, but enough to make me hate living here. Does this even qualify as abuse? I want out, but I'm terrified the system will make me stay here, and then I'm not even sure what would happen.

Sorry. I'm 17, I will be 18 in September

Answer 1

Yes, that is abuse. Even mental and physical. I moved out when I was 17 years old. It was hard. I had to graduate while working at 50+ hour job. You can do it. If I were you I would try and get a job and save some money. It costs a lot when you first move out. You need deposits and first months rent, etc. I'll be praying for you. If you need someone to talk to e-mail me. [e-mail].

Answer 2

It SOUNDS like abuse to me. Parents who talk about using "spanking" as a punishment tool are maybe ok if they're dealing with a todler. However, you're almost an adult and there is NO reason that your parents (or ANYbody) should be using physical "punishment" to hurt you. Hitting and pushing is not acceptable, and it's not even effective (unless the result they were hoping for was fear and resentment).

You sound miserable and scared, which is also a sign it's abuse. PLEASE consider confiding in a school counselor, trusted teacher, or adult friend to help you sort things out.

Or try here: http://www.safehorizon.org

P.S.--I would try to stay away from them as much as I could until you can really leave. Get a job, stay with friends, join a group, etc. Stay safe.

Answer 3

You left out how old you are; Ok, now let me ask you this.. when you got screamed at, did ya earn it? My son is 19, daughter 18, and I have had my screaming moments when they did something they were not supposed to do. I have not been a spanker, but I have spanked them when they were little, and when my son told me to 'shut up" I did smack him..right across the face, he has never done that again.. and was it a push out the door to get you to school?? My kids and I are close.. but we have had our moments.I never did believe that the 'happy chair' was a benefit to society at all.. the real question is do YOU feel like you are being abused? You are 17, you can get a job and emancipate yourself.. and still stay in school.. If your parents are abusing you, you need to talk to someone, but be careful.. there is a fine line. I had the switch used on me. In today's society, I could sue my parents for abuse.. yet,,, I am sure that switch has made me who I am today, respectful of others, kind, and aware of how to act and treat other people. I do not feel abused. If you feel your parents truly abuse you, you need to talk to someone there who can help you.

Answer 4

your 17 OK that changes things another year or so and you can leave for uni if you want to. If you aren't in school at the moment have you got a job if not get one it keeps you out of the house and you should be able to rent a place of your own soon if your parents see you as an independently functioning adult they will be less likely to push you around and for that matter if your schooling is finished you could just move out anyway that's what I did and as soon as I had I started getting on a lot better with these people who had previously been pushing me around

Answer 5

This is such a touchy subject, you know deep inside if your parents truly love you! Be careful if you are abusing alcohol or drugs which can distort the situation, If you are confused or truly being abused and need someone to talk to seek out your guidance counselor at school or your clergy if involvement, there has to be someone who you can talk to. Love should not hurt in the true sense of the word! Good Luck!

Answer 6

The system will not make you stay there. But you might consider going to a church member or school counselor so that they can talk to you and your parents. Maybe some behaviors can be addressed and things will become better for you. All churches welcome everyone with open arms. Or go through the phone book and call some churches until you find someone that you are comfortable with talking to. I have never raised my voice to my children or struck them. No one deserves to be treated like that. Best of luck in life. You have taken your first step.

Answer 7

If your still in school, tell the principal what is going on, let that person know that you do not want to go back to that house. Tell him to call protective services for you, when they arrive tell them the truth. You will not have to go back there. The hitting is abuse, pushed or hit is assault. Screaming, well who knows. You have nothing to be afraid of, just do it if you feel you need to get away and out of there.

Answer 8

Yes it is abuse. My parents are and were the same way when I was growing up. I hated living period. I walked on egg shells when I was home. I'm really sorry. And I know it doesn't help to sit down and ask them to stop. I really cant help much but to say you're not alone and that you will live through it

Answer 9

If they hurt you or make you afraid, it's abuse. Talk to your school counselor, and they should provide you with resources in your area.

You shouldn't stay there because you feel you "owe" it to them since they provide food, shelter and clothing for you. I know you love your parents, but you shouldn't risk your emotional or physical health to stay there. Good luck to you!

Answer 10

I don't think any solution between two people will be resolved by placing your hands on each other. But there is always three sides to every story. your side, their side and the truth. If it is that bad where you don't feel safe. Tell a counselor at your school they will be able to help you find a place to go.