the thing is that, lately he is ignoring me and im feeling like a complete fool cause im the one who is always running after him and im the one who is always checking up on him. now i cant take it anymore, im mad but i dont know how to face him and tell him about how bad he is making me feel. in a way i dont wanna lose him but it hurts being with someone when you see that the person is no longer as he was before, the person is probably no longer happy. please how do i go about with this, how do i tell him off.
i need hlp
2006-12-17 06:39:53 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Dump him and find a real man who will treat you the way you need to be treated!
2006-12-17 06:42:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
First of all, STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Think about what you just wrote!!!
What you are referring to is basically called "CO- Dependency"
STOP!!!!! Take it from someone who has recently "BEEN THERE< DONE THAT!!!! and have the broken home and lost finances to prove it!!!" IF he is treating you like crap DO NOT put up with it, lose the LOSER. YOU are better than that kind of treatment. If he "CHANGED" then what he is now showing you are his "true colors" what you saw in the beginning was an "ACT". IF he truly cared about you he would be there FOR YOU. DO NOT chase him, DO NOT check up on him, This is called "STALKING" and it is illegal. IF you feel the need to do this then he is apparently with SOMEONE else. You did not say whether you were married to the jerk or not. IF not just tell him to get lost. He is only using you for an EGO boost at the cost of YOUR self esteem, if you are married to him... PUT it to him like this " I AM the QUEEN of this CASTLE and like it or not YOU WILL TREAT ME with RESPECT which I deserve, and if you can't do that then FIND a really good DIVORCE ATTORNEY cause you're gonna need one." WALK OUT, It is easier said than done though. Especially if there is a marriage and children involved. IF like I said before, you aren't married to the jerk then let him fly, he will become some poor unsuspecting other woman's problems but you will have escaped long term damage to your self esteem and gotten rid of a rodent at the same time.
2006-12-17 06:53:49 · answer #2 · answered by takniteze 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit him down, write him a letter or something, let him know how this makes you feel, and if he starts to change his ways then at least you will know he is trying if not that means he really could care less about how you feel for him. I had an ex boyfriend who used to treat me like that, I told him I thought it was foolish and childish, you know he stopped and started opening up to me by talking a little more when he would get upset, but I know some guys who will do it just to get their way with you, like you say you are running after him, they like that stuff, but at the same time its hurting you. You need to talk to him, if he changes then you will know he is trying if not leave him because you dont need that type of treatment from anyone.
2006-12-17 11:31:55 · answer #3 · answered by Ms. Q 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well seance he ignoring you this should be telling you some thing he doesn't want you around this is why he is making you feel like a fool and you checking up on him you shouldn't be doing that he is a big boy.well you need to chill out for a while go on with your life its not going to do any good talking to him because you are mad at him he is doing this for a reason so you really need to move on in your life because you are going to get more hurt and mad then you are know.good luck
2006-12-17 06:48:56 · answer #4 · answered by little_bear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you set your self up for this fall, you were the one who was doing every thing to keep this relationship going,But the big question is Where? and because you did it all and he is not interested in contributing, you feel betrayed, We can only be lead if we pretend that the other person knows better than we do, as you are learning, I am truly sorry, but If you take what you have done and your behavior, as an informational lesson, all will not be lost, and next time change your thinking not the man
2006-12-17 06:46:22 · answer #5 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Work on your self image...he can only make you feel bad if you allow him to...if you are not living together and you have freedom of movement, go some place by yourself that the two of you have NEVER been before...somewhere that you would enjoy...invest in yourself...the reason that he is treating you this way is that he believes that you will always be there...that you will never leave...do something for yourself and don't invite him to come along.
2006-12-17 07:29:55 · answer #6 · answered by iamhhi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you can do depends upon the complexity of your relationship. Believe it or not you are not responsible for anyone's happiness except your own. If you have become a doorknob or a lampshade, then you need to leave. Your self-respect, self-image, self-worth and self-esteem are at stake and without these, life is almost worthless. Telling him off will accomplish nothing, but I understand your frustration and your need to vent your pain. When you lose someone, you tend to find yourself, your true self. It is a life-affirming experience.
2006-12-17 06:53:39 · answer #7 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would seriously confront him about it. Not in a harsh way or anything, but a relationship refers to you guys being a team and when a team lacks communication they fall apart. If he isn't willing to sit down and discuss how you feel then he is not worth the effort and no longer has the same desire for you anymore.
2006-12-17 06:48:37 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I used to be in your position when i used to always call and every time we fought, i would always be the one crawling back even though he was wrong. He thought that no matter how many times we fought, he could always degrade me and i would keep running back because he saw the weakness inside of me. Finally, after all the break ups and tears, i finally just ended it because i fought so much just to be content and i really don't need to fight for my happiness. I dumped him. i dumped him almost a year ago, and he's still chasing after me even now that i have a new boyfriend. seriously, you don't need to fight for your happiness.
2006-12-17 07:45:05 · answer #9 · answered by lady hiphop 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well just talk to him if he still cares about you he shouldnt get mad about the whole situation. If after you talk he doesn't change at all just no matter how hard it is leave him he isnt worth your time. The same is happening to me and I cant leave the guy alone Im always chassing him, but stop I think its to late for me
2006-12-17 06:42:57 · answer #10 · answered by Aby 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him staight up, hey this aint working out for me anymore I'm unhappy and I'm ready to move on. Make him think that you don't care play cold and then he'll feel some of what you felt. Nobody's worth chasing behind, especially if they don't want you
2006-12-17 06:49:02 · answer #11 · answered by Great one 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋