I have a wonderful boyfriend who i love totally... but i am messing things up with my jealousy and paranoia.. i have always been cheated on by past partners and although i have no reason not to trust my current boyfriend, i cannot help but worry all the time!! He puts up with me but recently i know he has been on the brink of ending things due to the way i am... this breaks my heart as i see that he is not only frustrated by the way i think but also hurt because i dont/cant trust him! i also have a child from a previous relationship (whose father was violent - i left him because of this and despite never standing in his was, he has never seen his child - he doesnt even know when he was born as i left when i was pregnant due to the volence) and although my current partner is wonderful with my little boy (2yrs old) and says he has no issue with me having a child at all, i still worry! i really need coping strategies to deal with my insecurity - help!
2006-12-17 06:22:19 · 5 answers · asked by *~_**_Jester_**_Girl_**_~* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I try to think about other things but i think part the problem is (and this may sound really mean and selfish!) that he can obviously go out and do whatever he wants, when he wants (and obviously i want him to be happy and do what he wants!) but i spend all my time sitting at home (i dont live with him) just waiting to hear from him and even as i am writing this i feel terrible, like people are gonna think i wanna control him - which i dont! tut tut @ me...i really am a rubbish, bad and horrid girlfriend!!
2006-12-17 06:31:56 · update #1
talk to him about it and explain how you feel and ask a trained therapist in this field to help your doctor should be able to put you in contact with one
2006-12-17 06:25:35 · answer #1 · answered by julie t 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be grateful to have such a wonderful man and put your insecurities on the shelf. Quit worrying about what he might do and focus on all the great things he's already doing FOR you. Otherwise, you might end up with dirtbags the rest of your life who WILL just use you like a door mat.
2006-12-17 06:26:08 · answer #2 · answered by Nikki W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give yourself a break, you sound like you have been through a tough time. Talk to him and explain how you feel. I can totally understand where you are coming from. If your partner goes out couldn't you arrange to go out for the evening? or invite some friends round to your house?
I wish you all the luck! :)
2006-12-17 06:36:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe you should talk it over with your boyfriend and explain the situation. it may help for you to hear him say it himself that you can trust him.
2006-12-17 06:28:01 · answer #4 · answered by kurama3173 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about other things!
2006-12-17 06:28:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋