Do you think being underprivileged adds character?

Question

I’ve noticed from a lot of my own experiences that being underprivileged then rising to the top really added character to my own personality and life.

When I had first moved out of my parents house, while they were still there for me, I would never ask them for a dime. They lived across country--my husband and I were literally alone in a new town. I remember scavenging out entire house for pennies to get pasta at Wal-Mart so that we could eat. I remember having such pride in what I was accomplishing even more so because I was doing it one my own.

I’m currently saving for my children’s college savings--I often wonder if that is best. Of course, I’m going to continue saving but I really think “making it on your own” adds so much more fulfillment and pride to a person.

How do you feel about kids getting a free-ride to college from their parents?

What do you feel are the possible negative and positive side effects about saving for college and/or continuing to manage children’s finances once they no longer live in the parents home?

Do you think being underprivileged in the beginning of life adds character or deteriorates a person?

Actually, my parents did save college tuition for me and I did use it but room and board wasn't paid for.

My parents weren't smart enough? They saved everything they could in savings bonds so when they retired they could buy a new car, buy a new home, remodel said home, send two teenagers to college (if need be) and so on. I didn't even mention if my parents paid for my college or not.

How am I jealous?

I even stated--they were there for me (implying if I needed something I could ask) but I never did or would.

Actually, my parents did save college tuition for me and I did use it but room and board wasn't paid for.

My parents weren't smart enough? They saved everything they could in savings bonds so when they retired they could buy a new car, buy a new home, remodel said home, send two teenagers to college (if need be) and so on. I didn't even mention if my parents paid for my college or not.

How am I jealous?

I even stated--they were there for me (implying if I needed something I could ask) but I never did or would.

Like I said in my email. It is a free-ride, isn't it? They don't have to pay for anything. What else did you want me to say. I mean really, you aren't the queen of being politically correct or polite, so I'm sorry if someone finally offended YOU about something.

What is a free-ride? Dictionary definition is: something obtained with no money or effort. Isn't that what going to college for free is about?

Answer 1

College is free in much of europe. Someone paying for your education is not a free ride - getting a degree without putting in any work - that would be a free ride. The point of college is not paying for something, it's learning something. And that requires lots of effort.

I think that how one is raised builds one's character, and then one's character is revealed by how one meet's life's challenged. Your tendency to want everything handed to you or your tendency to want to earn what you have is formed well before one is a young adult.

More often as not, living a tough life hardens a person, makes them feel entitled, lowers their empathy for others. Also, being underprivileged means a person is less likely to have access to information and resources for making and carrying out the best decisions.

It is certainly satisfying, and a real cause for pride, to overcome hardship. It's making lemonade out of lemons.

My parents, raised desparately poor, are incredibly hard working and self-reliant. The overwhelming majority of their siblings are not.

Answer 2

It depends on the person. Some people will work hard to get out of poverty, some will continue the cycle. I grew up pretty poor, but I always worked hard in school and saved money. Some other people in my same position just ended up at dead end jobs with no future and a Jerry Springer type life. My mom did her best to help me with school, we went half and half for my first year of college. I am saving for my child's education now, and I have been since her birth. But, it's going to come with a catch. She has to work hard and maintain an acceptable grade of C or better for me to continue to pay up. She must also still hold a part time job and apply for scholarships for school. I want to help her, because I know what it is to struggle- and I don't want her to.
I don't intend to manage her finances though. Hopefully, I will have raised her well enough to think responsibly.

Answer 3

It only adds character if the story has a happy ending.

After living in a mobile home in a mobile home park and having an electric bill that we could not pay my husband and I worked hard and ate a lot of Ramen noodles but 10 years later we now own 4 rental properties, a restaurant, and 1/2 of a medical supply company, we both drive exensive cars and live in a beautiful home. We have been blessed by God and I feel like we would not have appreciated the good times, if we had not had the bad times.

As far as paying for your children's college, if you can swing it and your children would appreciate it and not have to struggle with having to hold down a job and taking courses, it would be a great thing for you to do for them.

Answer 4

I think that being provided with everything can make you take for granted that it will always be there, when in fact it may not. It is good to have the kids have to work for the things they get. However, college tuition can be so stressful that it can take away from the quality of education that they recieve. Have them "save up" for college by working p/t jobs through highschool and insisting that they save 50% of everything they make and put it in GIC's that they don't have access to until they need it. Continue saving yourself as well but don't tell them about it until they actually go to college. That way they can study without having all the stress of wondering how they will survive while they do.

Answer 5

No. It comes from having parents who teach you the VALUE of things. Meaning that Life itself is not about "stuff" but about people and by running after things we get distracted from what is truly valuable, our relationships with others. Things can burn, break, be stolen or get lost, people will always be there for you even if you move, you can always pick up the phone.

This is why someone who was raised poor has a better value outlook on life, because they are usually in a more tight-knit family group.

Answer 6

I feel that being "underprivileged" can go either way. It can either lead to good character or gang violence. If a kid's parents have saved money for the child to go to college that is THEIR prerogative. Obviously you are envious of those who have had parents who were smart enough to save money for their children's college education. Luckily both my ex husband and myself saved quite nicely for my daughter's college education especially nowadays since most student loan companies are requiring payment in full within a year of graduation from college. It's not the kid's who's parents were wise enough to save for their college education fault that you weren't that fortunate. I was an emancipated teen, on my own at 16, I can't say whether it added character to my life or not but I never wanted my child to go through all of th crap I had to in order to survive. Yes she had it easier than I did and still does. So what? I don't think being envious/jealous that someone else had things that you didn't is all that great of a character...in fact I find it to be a MAJOR character flaw. So you haven't come as far as you think you have have you?

You're own words tell the tale..."How do you feel about kids getting a free-ride to college from their parents? ". IF you didn't feel a certain pang of "envy" you wouldn't have bothered to ask that question. Yes MY daughter has gotten a complete free ride (except for the rent she has to pay me which isn't much) for her college education, it was completely paid for, books, tuition even transportation to and from (we're both in college by the way)and she still lives with me. She IS one of those "free riders", and I am more than happy that her father and I can afford to give her that free ride so that SHE can concentrate on keeping up her 4.0 gpa that she has maintained for almost three years.

Answer 7

Being underprivelaged definitely adds character, because I can relate to you. Your story is pretty similar to mine, except I have to work for EVERYTHING I need. College is being paid by my fiance at the time. But yes, your answer to your question is Yes.

Answer 8

if it leads to being a good yet strong person then yes. otherwise being poor sucks BALLS.

Answer 9

it could do either one