Parenting advice??

Question

If you came hom a little early one night(you were supposed to be gone until the next night) and saw your son and his girlfriend sleeping in eachother's arms, would you assume they had sex?? Would you say anything to them?? He was in boxers, and her in a bra and panties. Would you assume they had sex or just fell asleep??
They are both 16. What exactly would you do or say?? Would you listen to you child??

(more info in other ?)

What will my husband do to my son?? He is coming home in a little bit and will see this.

Would my husband be on my son's side or upset?? He always asks my son if he kissed this girl or that girl.

She was in little, sexy underwear too, like they planned on seeing it.

Do I wait til tom when they wake up or wake them now??

Answer 1

I would assume they had sex. If they hadn't, they were certainly foolishly tempting each other. I am afraid there would be consequences, such as not seeing each other for a period of time, etc. I'm old school that way. That's how I roll.

Your mileage may vary.

Answer 2

I think that it is a safe bet that if they didn't go all the way, they are headed that way really soon. Sit down and talk to them both, maybe even with her parents, and let them know what the consequences of having sex really are. I started having sex at 16, was pregnant at 17. It worked out for us, but I made it a lot harder than it had to be. If I had waited a while longer, it might not have been so hard. I wouldn't be 24 and just starting college.

Make sure that they are being safe. Provide them with access to condoms and birth control.

Answer 3

That's a little tricky isn't it? If your son has been an honest kid up til now, then believe him... I wouldn't assume anything. Bring it up casually, don't get too upset about it (if they since you're upset they might withhold info.)... Just talk to him like an adult... and if they did have sex tell him (again) what consequences life might bring him... But yeah, maybe they did just fall asleep. ooo, wake them, talk to your son first before your husband gets home!

Answer 4

It depends how your husband really is.If you think he is going to lose his cool then wake both of them up and have a talk to both
of them. Tell them if they are having sex then they need to think
about getting protection from the Dr. so she won't get pregnant.
Let them know that they need to respect you and your husband
and that means no sex in your house. Once they become of age and they get their own place then that is on them that is their own
privacy, until then respect yours. You cannot stop them from having sex, but you can give them house rules which they can
go by. They can learn to live with it. Don't over react, cause even
if they did what can we do as parents, NOTHING they already
did it. Yes we can get upset, but then what they will go behind our backs just to see each other. That is why I say don't over
react, reason with them. Remember You and your husband
were once young and in love. My daughter and her CO-Worker
met at work and fell in love she was 17, he was 20, now 22 and
25 and have 2 beauiful children. Anyways when I first met him
he had went to her second job and We took him home with us and
I didn't see him as a bad guy or nothing, he was a respectful guy.
Well his mom would always come to pick my daughter up and
then one day she came home at night when I was asleep. She
can to my bedroom to show me a Positive Pregnacy Test, I told
her just to get out of my room, I was pissed off, I cry a little, then
I relized I was going to be a grandma and then I changed my
attitude. Of course we talk the next day, but this is why I'm telling
you don't over react and don't shut him out because they will
find somewhere else to get together to havew sex. So Just have
that Mother and Son talk. When your husband comes home
you can fill him in or your son can be strong and tell him himself.
If not Father and Son needs to do some talking as well.
Good Luck to All.

Answer 5

Yes, I would assume they had sex!!! 16 year olds don't strip down to their skiveys just to snuggle. I would have sent the young lady home and then had a heart to heart talk with the son after I regained my temper (I have a 23 year old and 17 year old son). Telling him that what he did is not acceptable in your house. It is your house and you make the rules on who can and cannot come over, when your child has to be home, with whom and where is he going when he does go out..... I would also take him to the local pharmacy and purchase some appropriate protection for him. Unfortunately you cannot get a child who is already sexually active to stop just because you say so.

I would also call the girls parents and tell them. Hopefully they are open minded parents who will do the same with their daughter.

Answer 6

I have a young daughter. I would hope when she is 16 this will not happen. I can not say what I would do exactly until that moment comes, if it ever does. But I would hope I would remain calm. I would gently awake her and put her to bed in my bed. And then I would put on some pajamas and lay down beside her boyfriend. When he wakes up and sees me laying there, I would smile and say, "We need to talk." His first reaction will be very important. But more importantly would be my ability to stay calm and listen to what both of them have to say. I would hope my daughter would respect me enough to be honest. If her honest reply was "Yes, we had sex." I would then do the responsible thing by taking her to the doctor to learn about birth control and the consequences of her actions, including becoming a mother at such a young age. And standing there with me as she learns about all this would be her boyfriend. Of course I would inform his father as to what happened and I would just have to hope he would allow me to do this. OK ... that is what I would WANT to do. If it ever happens I'll let you know what I actually did. 8~)

Answer 7

You should sit him down and talk to him. Don't assume and don't get angry. There is nothing that you are going to be able to do to stop them from having sex, but you can help to make sure that he is safe in doing so. By being angry and trying to tell him that he shouldn't and will only want to make him do it more. If you take the approach, "Son I just want to make sure that you are safe" then he is going to be more likely to listen. Isn't their safety and their future what is really important?

Good Luck, I hope that all works out well for you.

Answer 8

Ask your son what happend. At the end of the day, he's going to have sex if he wants to. you could lock him up, and he'd still work out some way to do it! You just need to make sure that he knows about the risks of unprotected sex! Meaning sexually transmitted desies (cant spell), pregnancy ect. There's no point fighting him, as he's just going to rebel more. Maybe sit them both down together?
Chances are, at that age they probably are having sex. And that's where you need to come into it, so they know that sex is not just sex... yes, it can be good, but that it can have alot of consiquences to it aswell.

Answer 9

oops i just answered your other question. No you should wake them up now. make a loud noise and go the door and say Honey you and Whoever need to get dressed and talk with me at the table. She should go home to her parents if it is not to late. you don't know what her parents will do so don't bring them into this until you talk openly with them. Your home does not have a lot of communication in it if you don't know how your husband will react to this, You need to open up the doors there. Hurry now go and wake them up.... Man Karen V knows your husband better than you cause she says he is going to be mad...

Answer 10

Let's assume that they had sex or at least a lot of heavy petting or oral sex. This is not acceptable behavior at all. Why does he have this girl in the house unsupervised? Have you spoken to her parents? Do you know her parents? You need to have a long talk with your son about safe sex practices and need to have better control of your household. (Not saying that you are a bad parent at all, just teenagers are pretty slippery!) Unless you want to be a grandparent waaaayyyyy too soon, get that leash tightened and do not leave him alone at home anymore. When you go out of town, he either stays with a responsible friend's parents or goes with you. The girl's parents also need to know what is up so they can educate their daughter.