how do i get someone that is very depressed to see he deserves to be happy. i am in love with this guy but don`t know the right things to say. He was divorced on April of this year and me in August but we have both been apart from our x`s for 1 year. His x won`t let him see his kids and that is alot of why he is depressed. He is also financially bad. I want to be there for him but I need help with the right things to say. We are very compatable and he wants to be with me but he doesn`t feel he deserves me. Please anyone out there with answer is very appreciated.
2006-12-16 11:50:54 · 6 answers · asked by sunshine72003 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A large part of "being happy" is "choosing to be happy". Sometimes, because of life circumstances, that is far easier said than done. Your goal, then, should be to convince him that you deserve him simply because you like him, and yes, he probably will need to be convinced of this. I don't think you can convince him that he deserves you without convincing him first that he deserves himself, and I don't think you'll be able to convince him of that without some help from him. He definitely sounds depressed, and he might do well with some counseling to try to get that under control before dealing with the bigger issues. Tell him that you are there to support him for as long as it takes, and that you are always willing to be there to lend an extra ear. He might not be able to appreciate that in the moment, but when he does get himself back together, he'll thank you for it immensely.
2006-12-16 12:17:13 · answer #1 · answered by G A 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Offer to go to a group session with him for people getting over a divorce. He might get some information there that will solve his depression over the divorce and with the children. Also this will take him into a more positive atmosphere and a communication with you and others. Isolation and dwelling on a problem is sign of a depression. Talk to the leader of the group and see if you can get him/her to discuss finances and then offer to give individual help. If the leaser can't do that have him suggest a place to go for financial help. And remember, each person has their own past, baggage, issues and time line to get over something. I hope that he can learn to move on because live changes and we need to move on as you seem to have done. If he can't do these things, perhaps you will have to move on because you can never change another person.
2006-12-16 11:59:05 · answer #2 · answered by StarGalactica 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His life has been turned totally upside down. Your the only thing that has been there for him. Go to court and petition to have visitation rights with his kids. You can do this for a small fee. Also his finances will change in time. Just be there for him and keep reassuring him of your love and support. It will take time and patience for him to finally see the light again. Right now your that tiny pin point of light in his dark tunnel. Maybe seeing a therapist short term may help him. Good luck to you both.
2006-12-16 18:02:43 · answer #3 · answered by Sweety 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should tell him that you really care about him. I suggest you tell him that he is a great guy and he doesn't deserve to feel that way. Tell him that you are there for him and you support him. Tell him that you trust him and if anything bad happens you can rely on him.
2006-12-16 11:57:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be patient with him,eventually he'll learn to trust you,with his emotions.
2006-12-16 11:57:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't no
2006-12-16 11:52:56 · answer #6 · answered by sweety84pie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋