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We are both in our forties. She is a new friend, and she is great, but she talks with her mouth full, sticks almost her entire hand in her mouth to pick her teeth(not even using a toothpick), and burps all the time. Should I just ignore the behavior and be greatful I have a good friend, or should i say something,and if so what do I say?

2006-12-16 10:43:41 · 11 answers · asked by Ruth 2 in Society & Culture Etiquette

11 answers

First and foremost, this type of behavior is rude in itself. So you should not feel like you will be rude if you address this when rudeness is what you are receiving.
As a friend, one should be respectful and mindful of her peers. Since this is something that is obviously bothering you, it MUST be addressed.
In a friendship, it is necessary to be honest with one another just like in any other sort of relationship. Would you talk with your husband about a behavior of his that made you feel uncomfortable? I'm sure you would. So why should this be any different?
It is important to be tactful when you confront her about the issue, but also be direct. Women tend to 'sugar-coat' things so much sometimes, that we end up creating more confusion than there was to begin with.
Mixing the positive with the negative creates tactfulness.
Tell her, "I've been meaning to talk to you about something...I enjoy our conversations when we're out in public, but it makes me uncomfortable when you pick your teeth at the table, burp or talk with your mouth open... "
Leave the topic open for conversation so that she doesn't feel attacked.
You might want to ask her, if there is anything you do that may make her feel simalarily. Using phrases like, "I understand" or "I know how you feel" will make the conversation flow better.
Try to come to an agreement that you are BOTH comfortable with, and in the end you will simultaneously solidify your friendship and feel more comfortable about and with EACH OTHER.
Good Luck!

2006-12-16 12:56:22 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

You just have to be completely honest with her. Talk to her in a calm way, of course. If she is as good as a friend that you say she is then she'll understand and stop. It will for sure be awkward and uncomforatble talking to her but it will definitely get the job done.

I've been in a couple of these situations. Not exactly the same problem, but the same book. The outcome of my situations were exactly what I wanted, just by being completely honest with the problem.

2006-12-16 10:53:52 · answer #2 · answered by MOTHERRR SOUP 5 · 1 0

Oh my, I would not be able to share a meal with this woman she would make me lose my appetite. This is a very big pet peeve with me. Table manners are a must. I would simply tell her in a gentle calming voice. That you find it really annoying. Tell her to eat in front of a mirror just once. Then she will get the message. Good luck and God bless****

2006-12-16 10:56:09 · answer #3 · answered by ? 7 · 1 0

Do an internet search for on table Manners and Etiquette. There are countless internet sites. Print up what you imagine can help her, and in case you extremely are a reliable chum to her, you ought to tactfully steer a discuss manners in route of her and enable her understand the disadvantages in our society in case you do not use them.

2016-10-18 09:28:14 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

There is nothing you can do or say to correct her that would be polite.

My advice: don't eat with her in public. Really. Have lunch with her at home, or in the homes of friends, or even picnics, but don't go out to a restaurant with her.

Further, never give a reason for it.

She MAY eventually figure it out, or maybe she won't, but you simply can't say or do anything!

2006-12-16 10:46:56 · answer #5 · answered by silvercomet 6 · 0 1

Unfortunately, many people today display the same type of behaviors, and more, that your friend does. Keep in mind that although proper manners and etiquette are desirable, they are not necessary for a great friendship. Keep your new friend and continue to role model great manners. She may catch on.

2006-12-16 10:53:19 · answer #6 · answered by maggiepirsq 4 · 0 2

seems you really like her,if you are a friend,you would honestly tell her in a nice way.she won't be offended,because i don't think she even knows that her table manners suck,maybe she grew up in a home where people don't really bother much about table manners.speak to her,she will like you more,she needs someone like you.

2006-12-17 05:36:15 · answer #7 · answered by dra shelley 3 · 0 0

Just say it. Make sure you are alone. Be firm yet kind. She'll either change or not. If she won't change then be careful where you hang out with her if that is an issue with you.

2006-12-16 11:20:04 · answer #8 · answered by Think.for.your.self 7 · 0 0

just hint abt it to her, tell her about an imaginary friend Ms.LEAH u had soem time back and describe her terrible table manners to ur new friend....(which should be exaclty like ur friends), then tell her how LEAH used to be teased behind her back, and through these sublte ways, make ur friend realise the importance of table manners..............which i hope she wud.....

2006-12-16 10:48:10 · answer #9 · answered by ria j 2 · 2 1

if i were you i would talk to her because that is rude and disgusting...if she's a good friend you should tell her the truth and she should understand...

2006-12-16 10:47:19 · answer #10 · answered by cute as a button!.♥ 6 · 3 1

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