My husband is home from iraq i think he has PTSD He won't seek help. He blames me for not being nice to him 24/7 though i try not to raise my voice anytime. i finally got fed up when he started doing the whole yelling in my face, and pinned me to floor and start doing all those military moves of bending wrists and arms in positions and pressure points to cause pain & harm me then wonders why i try to hit him off me, Hello it hurts. So i sought help through the Army Family Advocate program, and he thinks i'm jacking up his career cause i want him to seek help. And if he won't they'll do something about it. Did i cross the line taking it to his superiors, or was it okay to reach out for help.
2006-12-16 06:28:16 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Military
I think your actions were correct. I'm ex-Navy and had the same issue with one of my "kids". We had no idea anything was wrong until the wife finally screwed-up the courage to go to the Ombudsman.
She had waited longer than you... he had already passed the point of "pressure points" and had broken her wrist.
He had troubles... did some time in brig, got a TON of counseling, and finally came to understand it was HIS problem, and NOT his wife's. Thankfully they actually stayed together and are happily married to this day.
I can't promise you the same happy ending... but I'm thankful you sought help before your husband does time for putting you in hospital or worse.
I wish you luck and happiness.
2006-12-16 06:42:36 · answer #1 · answered by mariner31 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart, if you did nothing he'd probably hurt or even kill you. If he can't restrain himself then someone better. Just because he's seen fighting that's no excuse to act like a pig! He either has mental problems or is just a jerk(I'll give you the benefit of the doubt on this one.) If he can't control himself do you really want him to have a military career anyway? What's to say he won't take a weapon and knock off his squad someday? You may have saved a lot of lives. If he can't figure that out then to hell with him. You're better than that! Good luck!!
2006-12-16 06:44:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
He needs to get help before it gets out of hand. You did the right thing. I'm sorry to hear that he's not coping. Seeking help from family advocacy shouldn't ruin his career. Now, if he doesn't seek help and does something, then he WILL get in trouble. It's better for him to seek help than to wait until it's too late. Of course, I'm coming from an Air Force perspective, but the military that's what the program is for...HELP.
2006-12-16 06:39:51 · answer #3 · answered by nesescott 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm not a military person but I am a person with a lot of common sense. If he does not want you to seek help why is he treating you as if you were the enemy? His using his training to hurt you is so wrong! Walking on eggshells around him is only making him think you can manage to live like that all the time. You need to leave if he can't straighten out, because if he isn't trying to get help you need to do what you need to do to survive.
2006-12-16 06:40:03 · answer #4 · answered by marie 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing...he needs help. I just returned from Iraq, and I would never think of laying a finger on my wife..not because of my career, but because I love my wife. Now..I am not saying that he doesn't love you...he just has to go work through some issues. and for your own safety, you need to have a back up plan in case he does it again. make sure that when he gets in those moods, you leave for a while before he gets out of hand. talk to his leaders about what is going on. to many spouses in our army are becoming statistics....good luck...
2006-12-17 04:09:00 · answer #5 · answered by trooper (canine bad citizen) 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
easily....We pushed German back into their borders when they rightfully conquered maximum of Europe two times. Bullied Japan to a small island chain when they gained lands in China and the island in the Pacific Ocean. for sure we stopped North Korea from invading South Korea to keep them from being a unified usa adverse to their will. by using our potential we kept Russia from conquering all of Europe in the course of the chilly conflict. back the u . s . a . became bullying Iraq after we pushed them off of their rightfully conquest of Kuwait. Yup the large undesirable u . s . a . we deliver more desirable money over seas to assist the adverse of the international then the different usa for the duration of organic failures. Renie: The P3 Orion that became compelled to make an emergance touchdown in China that undercover agent airplane? The SUB HUNTER percentis no longer a spyplane it really is a militia asset used to seek subs to guard international delivery and US Allies. this is not a recon airplane
2016-10-18 09:16:12 · answer #6 · answered by canevazzi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's physical abuse and he could hurt you bad sometime. He needs help and you are doing whatever it takes to get it. You didn't do wrong at all. He no doubt has PTSD and once he gets treatment he may become your loving sweet hubby again! Good luck to you both and I hope in the end you will have a happy long marriage.
2006-12-16 06:40:36 · answer #7 · answered by Mercadies2000 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am an Air Force Vet. No you didn't cross the line.
Your husband needs help whether he thinks he does or not.
Trying to be supportive is one thing, but being allowed to be abused is not an acceptable form of support.
PTSD is a very serious medical condition, so please make sure you take it very seriously. Your safety is most important.
2006-12-16 08:26:33 · answer #8 · answered by larry m 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's always ok to reach out for help. It is true that the military is required to report things like this to his commanders (they don't want to send unstable people into war) however, if he was treating you this way then he needs to seek help. In my opinion, he's lucky you didn't go directly to his first shirt yourself.
2006-12-16 08:12:05 · answer #9 · answered by Melissa P 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he does need help. You did the right thing. Don't let him hurt you. It's always okay to reach out for help.
2006-12-16 06:37:50 · answer #10 · answered by Depp fan 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋