MY BOYFRIEND OF 4 YEARS IS ALWAYS PUTTING ME DOWN AND CALLING ME NAMES IT SEEMS AS IF IT IS GETTING WORST. HE TELLS ME THAT I DO EVERYTHING WRONG AND HE ALWAYS TURNS THE TABLES. HE TOLD ME THE OTHER NIGHT HE WANTED OUT OF OUR RELATIONSHIP BUT HE NEVER LEFT. WHAT SHOULD I DO?
2006-12-16 05:17:17 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
back away alittle........let him see if he would b happier without you...........dont always answer his calls.............tell him your busy right now...and e-mail me
2006-12-16 05:20:42 · answer #1 · answered by eldiablo0731 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Wow your self esteem has really taken a beating! To think you've been in this relationship this long! You probably feel at this point it would be hard to be in another relationship, like the hell you know is better than the one you don't. Well good news, you are already as low as you can go besides him putting his hands on you, and sista that's about to start (if it isn't already!). This is good news because you can only go up from here if you leave him alone. Of course you're not ready to do this now or you wouldn't be asking what to do! So what you do in the meantime is pull back. He will respond to distance, not crying or nagging. Don't return his calls for a few days. When you finally answer one, tell him in a calm manner you don't appreciate the way in which he has been treating you disrespectfully and you will no longer allow it. Don't argue, defend, or comment further than that. Get off the phone politely. Never call again until he does. If he is respectful continue as you please, if he is not repeat the above said. Either he will change or he wont. Either way you get to maintain your self respect and dignity. NEVER give that away under any circumstances! Would you be afraid to get rid of cancer if you had it? Well this guy is it!
2006-12-16 05:34:20 · answer #2 · answered by Meems 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He drags you down to make himself feel better, and he is overcritical of you because of his own weaknesses. He says he wants out of the relationship, but he'll never leave because he has his own personal emotional punching bag (you) he can use to elevate himself. That doesn't mean it's on purpose, it's just the easiest solution he's found to make his hurting stop. I did the same thing to my ex girlfriend for years, and only after she left me did I realize what a monster I had been, and how I had been ignoring the real problems in my own life. You need to get out of that relationship as quickly as possible, and concentrate on your life. It will be hard to turn away from 4 years with someone, but imagine how hard it would be to spend 4 more years in your situation.
2006-12-16 05:39:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
throw him in a trash bin. remember that us girls should never let anything and anyone to put us down... leave him before you lose your self-respect. No man should be abused physically, emotionally, or verbally even. Don't be afraid to let go of that 4 years that you spent together. You're not a waste. You will definitely find someone better - or if you don't then so be it.
2006-12-16 05:27:38 · answer #4 · answered by Stanne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you really need to rethink this relationship because what your getting is abuse, and if this man has no respect for you why are you there taking it, I know you have 4 years invested, but to all it looks like a bad investment, you need to look at you choices and do some thing about them, he will just keep on with his abuse it is not going to change
2006-12-16 05:23:24 · answer #5 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, I been thru the same thing you need to leave before the abuse starts, cuz thats next! Then its gonna be even worst, and sooner or later you will be so stuck in you wont know what to do.....Just talk to him let him know how you feel and whats its doing to you and see if he tries to change, if not get out believe me....good luck!!
2006-12-16 05:31:20 · answer #6 · answered by Mamiinkcmo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him first, and ask him what he doesn't like about you. If it's something you can't change, or something you don't think should be changed, then you definitely should break up. He is probably sick of the relationship, and don't know how to handle it. But first, talk to him. You never know!
Actually, if it were me, if my boyfriend called me names, I would break up IMMEDIATELY. But you don't seem to be like me, so go for the first option.
2006-12-16 05:26:17 · answer #7 · answered by Offkey 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why have you been with him for 4 years if you have had to put up with it for that long you shouldn't be with him he doesn't care about you the way you should be cared for
2006-12-16 06:07:37 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
leave. no person deserves to be treated that way. it is only going to continue to get worse if you stay. the emotional abuse that you are experiencing now can and will turn in to physical abuse. get out while you can.
2006-12-16 05:22:10 · answer #9 · answered by maggie 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If a man likes you he won't put you down, or say he's sorry for doing it. Please never let a man treat you like crap unless you know you might deserve it
2006-12-16 05:37:24 · answer #10 · answered by kayef57 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look if i were u i would first ask whats wrong and if i don't get an answer i would leave him before it gets worse and he trys to hurt u
2006-12-16 05:20:54 · answer #11 · answered by Andrea M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋