was it someone else?

Question

My ex broke up with me a couple weeks ago. She says she still wants to try and see what happens but wants to keep me away. I can't help but think that she is wanting someone else and is just keeping me within reach as a backup. We fought sometimes and that was her reason for the break up. I can't understand why she didn't want to work things out though, because we have a 6 month old son together. Is she just stringing me along? What do I say to her to find out and what do I say to her if it is the case? I know I don't want to be with her anymore if it is. She mentioned that she was having sexual thoughts about other men and wouldn't tell me what she meant(this was right before the breakup).

I guess I should add the fact that I'm 23 and she's 21. Also she has been acting like she doesn't love me for a while now (a few months). I asked her if it was someone else and she denies it but I cant shake the feeling.....

Answer 1

I would advise her to see her doctor to make sure it is not extended post natal depression. I went through the same thing after my second child was born. Just needed my space to establish who I was again. Motherhood is a much bigger change then you realise.

Answer 2

I'm sorry to hear this chris but, this is what I have against these relationships, your proof they don't work and, when they don't the couple can just walk away, leaving kids behind.

I don't know what to say except that she's missing something, there's something lacking here. Whether it's you. maybe her? you don't give ages, how long you've been together, etc. So much info missing.
If she's with another guy, then I'd forget her, if she wants to run the stable, leave her go. Next time make it legal Chris and maybe it'll work better.

Answer 3

I agree with the previous poster regarding postpartum depression. It can last for up to two years, and if not treated, can turn into clinical depression. This may have already happened. Do not jump to conclusions and assume that she is seeing someone else. Keep an open mind about this, her life has just been turned upside down and inside out. Just be patient and kind, and love her through it.

Answer 4

Sounds like she's onto another person. But, since you have a child together, its best to try to work it out espcially for the child's sake. Talk it out. Treat her nicely and sublty enough to make her guilty and tell you what was really going on. I know how it feels to be a backup; so its best to go upfront. If you really can't stand the suspense, help her to move out back to her parents or something, where she'll be looked after as well as the baby. She may be old enough to make her own decisions, but we feminines are such a 'pighead' (pardon the jargon). Good luck.

Answer 5

Because of your son you are always going to be involved in her life. She sounds like maybe she is really young and since she just had a baby probably wants to spread her wings and fly a little. Let her be. If it was meant to be, it will. maybe this is just something she needs to get out of her system. Time will give you your answer.

Answer 6

First of all, what the hell are you doing having kids with a girl you are not even married to? Shame on you. That's why you can't keep a relationship together. You didn't commit to her.

Dump the baby on her and start your life. Be grateful that she hasn't file for child support as of yet. For the next 18 years, be prepared to give her half of your paycheck. That's what you get for not thinking things though.

Answer 7

She wants to keep you around so if she can't score with another guy she will have some one to fall back on. She's being selfish. Don't get back together with her.

Answer 8

Definately someone else.

Answer 9

there is someone else