I hate my daughters boyfriend?

Question

Th guy has a kid that he didn't want. He has had unprotected sex with my daughter. He smokes and is in a dead end job. He owes people money and his parents are loosers.

Answer 1

And yet she is still dating him. So now you have a choice. You can either choose to accept this as your daughters choice, (depending on how old she is) or you can try to see what she sees in him. Could she be seeing him because she knows he is everything you hate to prove a point to you? Are you judging this guy based on your own personal preferences without actually knowing anything about him? What makes you better than his family to the point that you have any right to determine that they are losers? Have you tried to talk to your daughter and let her know how you feel or to find out what she sees in this guy? I think you have alot of questions to delve into here if you truly expect to come to terms with not having control over who your daughter is having relationships with that go deeper that just these few issues you have put on the table here. Nobody said parenting was easy.

Answer 2

Other then him having a child he does not want I think you need to come up with different reasons to not like him.

I am in a dead end job some would say and I love my work. I like everone else owe people money and an out side person would call my parents drunks.

I do not think you can get your daughter away from him. The best thing you can hope for is she will grow away from him and find someone better.

Does he pay child support for his child.? Does he help take care of his child.?

Answer 3

wow, is your daughter in for a rude awakening.
From what you have written This guy sounds like a looser all the way around.
Does she not see having unprotected sex woth a guy like this can be bad?
She may not like it but yoou need to have some good one on one talks with her.
She is headed down the wrong road with a guy like this.
There is not a good future with a person like this for her.
This is a big heartache for parents today. Kids do not stop and think before they act and then later realize they made a big mistake,
If she continues with this jerk,she may regret it in the future. If his parents are of the same mold, dont expect any help from them with the problem.They probaly laugh about what he has done so far.
good luck. I do mean that. things like this are a parents nightmare these days.

Answer 4

There doesn't seem to be a clear question here, but if you're looking for suggestions for what to do....
You could be cleaning a shotgun in the front room the next time he comes over. "oh, hey there, [scumbag's name]. Yeah, just cleaning my shotgun here. There's a lot of scum out there in the world and I'm just glad to know that if I ever find anything that might threaten the happiness of any member of my family, I've got good ol' bessie here. Now I know you wouldn't have any hesitation about treating my daughter with the utmost respect in every manner, isn't that right?"
(it's probably not effective, but I think it's funny)

Answer 5

How old is he? Some guys take a while to get it together. Hopefully, he'll straighten out. You might consider sitting him down and talking to him. Maybe his parents didn't serve as good role models. You can maybe provide him with something that will straighten him out. You probably won't get very far being blunt with him. Just try talking to him as a mentor. If not, try to talk some sense into your daughter.

Answer 6

you do have the right to be concerned but you should express these concerns to your daughter. If she is already having sex with him then warn her about pregnancy and Std's and tell her you are concerned for her, and if after that she still continues to see him she must makes her own mistakes in order to learn from them. I know its hard as a parent to stand in the shadows and feel as though what you say doesn't matter to her but really it does matter and she wants you to tell her about your concerns.
Good Luck!!!
BTW if she is under age and he is of age then have him arrested for rape.

Answer 7

Don't try to separate them cos this will only make them get closer.Instead you could talk to your daughter to find a job and have protected sex.Give her a specific amount of time to figure out things on her own.In that way she will be able to learn.

Answer 8

Hi there!
I can understand how you feel.
The best advice I can give you is not to say anything to your daughter about how you feel...... if you do, .. she will cling to him all the more.
Then just pray she sees him for what he is..and ends the relationship on her own.
You may want to just mention that she should practice safe sex and use birth control.
Good Luck!

Answer 9

I have three daughters, one son he brought home a dandy! I could not stand her from the get go, I tried to find the good in her and focus on that, eventually there was nothing good left because I knew just too much about this zany nasty little thing! She had a big loud mouth, said the most unbelievable things, did the strangest things, it got to the point that she was the joke of the family and friends, Hubby nicked named her fruit loops! Even our dogs ran when they saw her!
I talked to my son about her and what I felt, did not tell him to dump her but did tell him not to make any babies or marry her. I tried till blue in the face to get through to this girl to no avail. Then she started stalking me and my husband, it got worse and worse, to make a long story short, I snapped! I ripped her up one side and down the other verbally, told her exactly what I thought of her and that I never wanted to see or hear from her again, to stay away from me and not to expect my feelings to change if she were to marry my son or have his baby! I was mean as hell! She broke into my house and I found her!!!! She left my house in trays, the next day she brought me a basket of petunias (I hate petunias!) I let my daughter on her request take them to her house and throw them in her drive way! When my son found out what I said and did he came to talk to me about it, I admitted what I had done and said and told him why, he smiled and said why didn't you just tell me you hated her guts? After I explained how he was grown and I had to let him make choices he told me he was waiting for me to say something because he could not stand her either! Hope I at least gave you a chuckle! I later learned that she even bought him a wedding ring and expected him to ware it because she learned a girl asked my son out on a date not realizing he had a girl friend.
Tell your daughter how you feel! Don't bottle it up like I did! It is not healthy to do that and blow! Get it out on the table and then let it go, be there for your daughter and one day I hope she sees the light and gets away from him!

Answer 10

You are right to hate him. He is not a good match. He is a cheater. He will only have sex with you daughter and will ruine her carreer.