After a bad break-up, how much do you think the person changes?

Question

If somebody treats you badly during your relationship with them, would you assume that they will continue such behavior with their future partners? I just learned a man I was involved with in the past has hooked up with a new girlfriend. He treated me pretty badly, and I dumped him. But sometimes I can't shake the feeling that he's changed and is now Mr. Perfect, or Mr. Closer-to-Perfect, and for some reason it bothers me. I wouldn't take him back, he had a lot of problems, but I'm wondering how common this feeling is. Aren't our behaviors pretty hard to change unless we really focus in on them and make an effort to be aware of them?

Answer 1

maybe it's not that he has become Mr. Perfect, but the fact that he moved on and found another girl so fast. That gives the illusion that he is now more socially acceptable somehow, but she probably hasn't seen the same flaws that you know are there yet.

Answer 2

You feeling the way everyone who goes through a break up feels. And just know one thing men change on their own, a woman cannot change a man. If your thinking this new woman changed him, NOT. Maybe temporarily but not infinitively

Answer 3

yup! mine did become purfect and we had a great thing going on after that. But then, after a year or so, he went back to his same old, same old self. Nothing is permanent in this world.

Answer 4

my bf dumped me and he had problems but he just didn't want me to be alone just waiting for him to come or call. so you knew what's best for you tell him you still have feelings for him and be friends when the time is right you guys will be re-united.

Answer 5

ive had trouble... when i broke up with my last girlfriend (we broke up because she moved away.. far far away) i had trouble showing affection to people that reminded me of her... i was able to hide my sadness well do to the fact that i do stand up so i just laughed it off... but deep down it hurt.