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don't make enough money at all to even rent an apt. My parents are great support, but we have way to many arguments about who the actual parent of my child is. My son is supposed to sing in the Christmas pagent at our church with me. He fought the rehersal tonight and cried. We were bribing him and doing everything we could to get him to stop crying but being nice about it because he is very tired. My dad came up and just yelled at him until he cried worse. My son reached the "gaspy" cry stage and wasn't going to be able to sing until he calmed down. My dad turned to me and said I suggest you just give up on this he can't sing (he knows the song backwards and fwds). I looked at my dad and (I am usually really really passive about the actions they take) and said I suggest you butt out of it and go away! He walked off all offended. My friend took my son to calm him down. I stayed crying myself and my mother defended dad. Am I wrong to have said this? How should I deal with this now?

2006-12-15 13:41:11 · 6 answers · asked by Erin B 2 in Family & Relationships Family

6 answers

Yes dad was out of line yelling like he did. The kid was tired and you should have let him rest prior or made excuses and gotten him a nap or to bed. As long as when you chastised your father you were dealing with the fact that it is never a good idea to yell at a 5 year old...especialy for something all 5 year olds do.....cry when tired and under pressure. In a cool moment go hug or love on your dad the way you did when you were younger prior to his grandfatherhood and ask him to give you advise on how to motivate and control the child rather than him doing it...then honey it's time for you to stop inflicting your child on other people. When the get cranky you take them home and get them a nap or the bed, but you deal with them and spare the rest of humanity. This does 2 things. It teaches the kids that they can't act any way they want and that your the boss...you are in charge..they will learn to rely on this fact and get reassurance from it.

Next thing and probably more important. You need to get out of your parents house. You probably can't afford an apartment cause your doing work your comfortable with. Or you don't want to get a 2nd or 3rd job. do what it takes and let your parent's help with child care or rides or things like thhis. They will respect the effort and your self esteem will soar. If you are going to school get a job related to your course of study, get what ever aid you can and you had better be getting whatever child support the state will enforce on your baby's dad. Quit being the baby and start being the adult you thought you were when you were having unprotected sex and no way to support the outcome. don't make your parents and your children pay for your immaturity forever.

2006-12-15 14:05:12 · answer #1 · answered by Cadman1965 3 · 0 0

There is a saying that goes like this, "Familiarity breeds contempt" and that is the problem. You and your son and your parents are in each others face just way too much. Is there any way you can once in awhile give your parents a break? Maybe they just need some space. However, I agree with you, it isn't your dad's place to yell at your son. It seems everyone is just way too frustrated with each other. Get some sort of State assistance and try and get out on your own.

2006-12-15 14:19:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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2016-10-05 09:09:59 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

I agree with your sentiments, that it's up to you to riase your child, but since your dad is also family, it could have been handled with more tact. In other words find a nicer way to say things.
You might sue your son's father for child support so you can afford to move.

2006-12-15 14:18:11 · answer #4 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0 0

no your not he yelled at your son if my babys got yelled out by there grandpal for crying and kept putting me and my twins down I would bet someone a**! but my mom did yell at at me for having a baby so young I mean very young!

2006-12-15 13:47:58 · answer #5 · answered by mom at 12 now 14 1 · 0 0

Say sorry even if you think your right. It's the Holidays, I think it's the one time where we can swallow our pride even if it kills us.

2006-12-15 13:50:03 · answer #6 · answered by Yahoo Anwers 5 · 0 0

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