My brother insists that we all take turns visiting Mom, but it's really hard for me....any suggestions.
2006-12-15 09:19:09 · 5 answers · asked by cookster 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
If you can't go, you can't go. Your brother can't force you to go. But if your mom is still lucid enough that she KNOWS you aren't going, I think you should try to visit her. My dad has Alzheimer's and I see him at least three times a week, if not more often. Every time I see him he says "when are you coming again?" and if I don't come over, or I'm late, he is very sad. When I come over unexpectedly, he is full of joy. Yes, he is a pain, he's annoying, he's like a 5 year old, but it doesn't hurt me to sit and watch TV or do a puzzle with him. He might not know my name and be a little fuzzy on what my relationship with him is (I'm "that girl") but he knows I'm important.
2006-12-16 02:46:42 · answer #1 · answered by Gevera Bert 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My grandmother had alzheimers, so I know it's hard to see. I really think you should visit with your mom. Maybe you could try to work up to it. Ask your brother if you two could visit together a few times. Watch what he does and says. Try short visits at first and work up to longer ones. Ask a close friend to go with you. I don't know exactly how your mom is, but you could try taking pictures of the family with you. I know my grandmother seemed to like looking at pictures of all of the grandchildren.
Best wishes.
2006-12-15 17:53:17 · answer #2 · answered by Lily 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all deal with our loved ones in our own way. Maybe explain to your brother why it's so hard seeing your mom in her present condition. All family members should "do their part" when a loved one is ill. Perhaps you can help in other ways. Can you "sit" with your brothers kids while he goes or bring him a meal so he doesn't need to worry about eating when he schedules a visit? Find alternative ways to help out. You and your brother are going to need each other more and more as time passes. Don't ruin your relationship. Keep communicating with honesty and sincerity.
2006-12-15 17:28:01 · answer #3 · answered by butkus 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is there a reason why you find visiting difficult? I know that she may not be aware that you are her daughter aor even that you are there, but she does need company even if for a very short visit, try to work this out, for you own sanity
2006-12-15 17:53:26 · answer #4 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are being very selfish, it's your mom that needs support not you.
2006-12-15 17:27:25 · answer #5 · answered by b T 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋