Why don't I feel like socializing, going to office party tonight?

Question

I just don't ever feel like socializing with my co-workers,they are good people I'm always like this, I finally am making myself go this year so as to not be anti social, I usually enjoy it more than I think I will. I want to just eat and leave.

Answer 1

Reading other people's answers I'm not sure that they are exactly hitting what you mean. Consider this possibility, that you are a very shy person, or more clearly you are afraid of people knowing who you are. It isn't just the party, it's the fact that you need to talk to these people about things that are not work. You may feel somehow inadequate or unequal to your peers. Your superiors are also going to be at these parties and this might heighten these fears. You are maybe afraid of saying something stupid. You have done it in the past and are plagued by regrets of things you have said or done in these situations (even though they were truly trivial and undoubtedly not remembered by the people involved).

Basically you may be suffering from some kind of social anxiety, not just some general dislike about what happens at these parties. I can only suggest that you take heart what you said which is that you "usually enjoy it more...". Try not to show up alone, pick some close co-worker to help you navigate socially. You many need to explain it as a kind of off hand comment ("Oh, I hate these things, I never know what to say" etc). If you picked reasonably well, they should be supportive by telling you not to take yourself too seriously. It pays to be a good listener, you don't always need to start the conversation or only be a party to a private dialog (just you and someone else). Find the set of co-workers at the party you feel most comfortable with and alternate locations - People tend to form small circles of conversations (3-4p). This will allow the person you came with to not feel like you are depending too strongly on him or her, but feel free to periodically touch base with that person regularly ("did you try the cookies", "did you try the cake"). Notice that you may not be the only person having social difficulties here, but these people may not be of help. They may be too afraid to talk to you or circle among the party with you. They are also likely to just eat and leave you by yourself.

You may surprise yourself that frequently you can actually add to a circle of conversation and not just nod in agreement or look interested. The more frequently you participate at this type of event the easier it will be to participate in these things in the future.

Answer 2

I can relate to you. I never go to my office parties either. I like my co-workers but after working all day, I just want to go home and relax. I commute via public transportation also and don't like taking it too late at night by myself. I never hear anything about my parties after wards which proves to me they are nothing special. I prefer to go out to dinner with my own friends.

Answer 3

I hate office parties. People usually end up making fools of themselves by drinking to much and doing things they never would do if they were sober.

Answer 4

maybe you feel tehparty really is meaningless? maybe you feel as if when you will go to the party you will feel lonley? anyways go there and have fun you are just as good as anyone else and you deserve it as much
or maybe u are just tired to see the same people again

Answer 5

i reckon you like somebody at your office or have had a bad experience with a colleague and feel uncomfortable about getting drunk and being vulnerable i don't mean just sexually

Answer 6

cause you are depreesed about not being abled to eat the cake cause you mite feel sick inside cause youre fasting.

Answer 7

I HATE TO GO TOO ALL OF THE THING MY JOB PUT ON