So you invite all your friends to come and they can go off the registry to get you something, then they have to get your another gift for the actual wedding? Isnt that kinda bad?
2006-12-15 08:00:47 · 21 answers · asked by JustWondering 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Yes. If you are attending to both the bridal shower and the wedding, it is proper and customary to bring two gifts. For the bridal shower, bring something for smaller and intimate that the bride will use and appreciate. Lingerie, spa gift certificates, or candles are all appropriate. Then for the wedding, bring a larger gift for the newlyweds as a couple. That gift should be something they will need to set up house, or start their new life together. Cash is acceptable to give as a gift for the wedding (in the bridal purse) if it is atleast $100. A good registry should include a variety of things in a variety of price ranges so that guests can pick and chose what is meaningful and affordable for them.
2006-12-15 09:00:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Okay a few things to know about showers and weddings:
1. You NEVER put on your own shower - it is a party put on by your family or friends in your honor and you should not be involved in planning or hosting it. You are right - that would seem rude.
2. Yes - a bridal shower invitation does carry the expectation of a gift, as that is the point of the shower and attending without a gift is poor etiquette.
3. Weddings, on the other hand, are the opposite. A wedding invitation should NEVER carry the expectation of a gift and it is perfectly acceptable to attend a wedding/reception without bringin a gift. For this reason - gift details like registeries should never be listed with the wedding invitation.
Of course, some people will buy a gift for both the shower and the wedding, but that is their choice not yours:) So if someone wants to have a shower for you, enjoy it - but a bride should never plan her own as that is considered very rude.
2006-12-15 10:23:09 · answer #2 · answered by Chrys 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well, firstly you don't host your own bridal shower. It is usually hosted by your mom or the mom of your man, your friends, your sisters, aunties, etc..
Usually, shower gifts don't come off a registry (some people don't use registries, anyway, I know I sure as heck don't) because they are way less expensive and sometimes more personal than wedding gifts. For example, that's where someone would buy towels, small kitchen things, room decoration stuff, etc.
For the wedding, most people buy a more substantial gift.
Gee, don't feel guilty about it - people have been doing this for decades - and we pass it along through each generation, to help get the young couple set up in their household. It's basically being part of a big, long chain... which is kind of cool when you think about it. Someday you will do it for your daughter, or niece, etc.
2006-12-15 08:40:05 · answer #3 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well acutally YEAH, that is how I have always done it.... You take something off the registry for the show, like a toaster or blender and on the wedding day you give a card with some money in it.... The point is to help the couple out in their new life together. So yeah your supposed to do both gifts, but nothing too major if you can't afford it. Also that is why the shower is usually months before the wedding, you should have time to save up an extra $20 for the wedding day.
2006-12-15 08:27:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
No, the bridal shower is not host by you. It should be hosted by your in-laws, a friend a coworker, a church person etc. The guests are supposed to give you SMALL,useful gifts of rather personal nature. For example, kitchen stuff (towels, spatulas, etc), bathroom stuff, cleaning stuff and even lingerie for you.
The purpose of your bridal showers is so your female friends and mother can give you stuff to take care of your home and your husband, It's a women party sorta speak. People should not buy a Big gift, nor you should expect one.
Homemade gifts are acceptable in this ocassion, doilies, quilts, embroidered towels etc. are the norm if you are inviting older folks.
You can have a bridal shower "theme": kitchen, bathroom, lingerie, garden etc. You should NOT register for a bridal shower, but you can have a theme if you wish to receive specific gifts.
This is a rather informal, sentimental affair and is doesn't replace the gift given at the wedding.
I hope this helps. Congratulations
Good luck
2006-12-15 08:19:57 · answer #5 · answered by Blunt 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I've always considered bridal shower gifts to be intimate as well. Either a slinky negligee, or something girlish since the groom is usually not there (though sometimes they are, NOT of their own free will!).
But yeah, it is interesting they have a bridal shower gift and a wedding gift.
2006-12-16 10:13:46 · answer #6 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I usually get two gifts. One off the registry. And one as a shower gift. Some times the shower gift is a joke gift or something sexy. All depends who is getting married. Always a variety. Hand cuff's, etc. Showers should be fun.
Same thing with a Baby. One gift for the baby shower and one gift when the baby is born.
2006-12-15 08:34:35 · answer #7 · answered by skooter 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, no, no. It is totally rude to throw YOURSELF a shower. It has to be thrown by a non-family member, in your honor. They are also optional.
In many regions the shower gift IS the wedding gift. Only a few people chose to gift twice.
Wedding gifts are never mandatory, but if someone decides to attend a shower, they MUST bring a physical shower gift with them (NOT money or gift cards), however the gift can be small, or even handmade.
Wedding gifts should NOT be broght to the wedding or reception itself. they need ot be dropped off ahead of time or shipped to teh bride's home or the couple's home.
And the registry info is only relayed if the person directly asks if the bride has registered anywhere. That info is not "publicized" by the bride-- it would be rude. She only tells her parents, groom, maid of honor, and shower hostess, if any. After that, it's by word of moouth or only if someone asks.
2006-12-15 08:09:06 · answer #8 · answered by Etiquette Gal 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It can sometimes seem like double-dipping but there is a difference between the two. At a bridal shower the bride usually received gifts that are personal to her (and usually of personal use) whereas the gifts that are received at the actual wedding are for use by the couple. It's kind of a way for both the bride and the groom (as they get their "gifts" at a bachelor party) to get something for themselves and something together as a couple.
2006-12-15 08:06:00 · answer #9 · answered by christine_gray6632 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The point of a bridal shower is to get gifts for you and your hubby to be for your new life together before the wedding, or when ever you are having it. That way they do not have to bring a gift to the wedding and it saves you having to load them all up at the end of your reception. They do not have to get you gifts for both events.
2006-12-15 08:03:37 · answer #10 · answered by twt1999brd 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋