Let me explain the story. Last year a young lady joined my singles group. Although she was fairly close to my own age (I'm 30), she was a recent college grad. We got friendly. I was rather intersted in starting a relationship, and I think she was too., but she was also involved in a job search.
Well, last February, she took a job teaching in Japan. It was a one-year commitment, and I figured she'd be back after that. We said sayonara back in late April. We've emailed and spoken on the phone since.
In October, she told me she had accepted another year. Other signs, including her buying a car, make me think she may be figuring on Japan as a semi-permanant thing. There are those in my singles group who believe that she'd be convinced to stay if I shared my feelings (If she's not interested in me, then they've misread some clues too).
So ladies....would you come back in that situation? what do you think I would do? I want some advice form people outside this thing.
Thanks!
2006-12-15 07:26:06 · 3 answers · asked by joshcating 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If she wanted to pursue a relationship with you she probably would have come home by now. The time has passed for you to mention your feelings.
2006-12-15 11:23:12 · answer #1 · answered by Dellajoy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it all depends on the gal, I think. if she hasn't gotten a clear committment from you, she doesn't want to be tied down, or knows that marriage isn't in the cards any time soon, she may have just decided that it's not a big deal to extend her stay for a year.
having a car in japan may just be a convenience thing depending on where she is in japan. no matter how punctual mass transportation is there, if you live in the boondocks of japan, you're going to want a car.
On the plus side, she may have so much confidence in your relationship that she didn't think it would be a big deal. I can't relate to that but you never know.
This may be scary for you but I think you should go straight to the source. Tell her that you felt a little weirded out that she decided to stay and you want to know where your place is in her life. If she's real, she'll give you the skinny on her thought process.
2006-12-16 01:32:35 · answer #2 · answered by soulncountry1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never. My career is more important to me than any man. Long-distance has worked for you so far, so keep at it and see what happens. But if she quits her job just to be closer to you, she's a right idiot.
2006-12-15 23:54:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋