teen manipulation??? is this situation here, normal?

Question

I have a 14yo son. He is unusually moody these days and very 'sensitive' in conversation. However, I find that when he is being a 'nicer' son than usual, that soon after or later that day/week, there is something he 'wants' or 'wants to do' as in go to the movies on Friday night, etc.

Is this normal teen behavior? Or, do I have an unusually cunning and manipulative teen here?

After he gets what he wants (if that's how it pans out), he is back to the usual moody and anger oriented teen. If he doesn't get what he wants, he has a 'temper tantrum'.

Please give input. Thank you!

Answer 1

"Teenagedom" can be very complex: developmentally social life becomes more important, entering into puberty and hormonal shifts can cause extreme moodiness (typically thought of as a "girl" issue) in boys, physically maturing and brain development is continuing. Taking these things into account, being 14, I'm not so sure I'd ever want to repeat it!
For the most part, it sounds like normal behaviors - cunning, manipulative, sweet, can be kind when needed, temper tantrums, becoming more independent without wanting to cut the apron strings just yet. Often a daily battle internally for teenagers cognitively and physically. They often can't tell you either about what's going on, because they themselves don't know even.
Watch out for shifts in friends, grades dropping, and other things that just don't quite add up. Trust your instinct as a parent and talk to him without demanding answers, but rather letting him know that you're willing to listen without fear of retribution. Talk to him as though he's an adult and let him know how you feel honestly when he does these things. See what happens.....He might be more open than you think.

Answer 2

evaluate your self 15. The contraptions of regulations and values that ruled your existence at that age have been distinctive - have been they no longer? the hot paradigms state that element like unchaperoned dates are passe. that little ones are examining texts and subjects that we under no circumstances concept-approximately or will examine now. That the regulations of the interest have replaced - a pair of pennies have been ok for pocketmoney once you have been 15 - yet now many money are no longer too plenty. A single cinema fee ticket now costs greater desirable than the entire months allowance. you're caught on your guy or woman paradigm and choose directly to do issues and see limitations as they have been an prolonged time in the past. Your 15 12 months previous sees you doing issues from a place outdoors of your limitations - and so he can see you in yet differently. The 15 12 months previous has his very own paradigms. do no longer enable your self to proceed to be in conflict along with his or hers. stay and enable stay. as long as you recognize the 15 12 months previous exact - you will comprehend his or her desires and you will fulfill them even it the diverse desires and regulations are distinctive from yours. And in case you are trying this - then the newborn won't in any respect have the would desire to manage his mum and dad or siblings to get his "needs" of existence. the foremost lies with you and as long as your shop coaching the newborn a thank you to regulate those damned hormones ,, you will do nice,

Answer 3

Yes it is normal, and it is manipulation. The age is one of "finding their place in the pack". The hormones are raging and the brain is scrambled. They will do what they can to get what they want, even as far as being deceitful and secretive. Don't let them take your genorosity or love for granted. Sometime you just have to use "Tough Love" and say NO. Most children now days have very little respect for their parent(s) or others or even for themselves. They need to know you love them, but don't like the things they do. If the anger the child is exibiting causes you distress or even fearful of how agressive they can become, it is time to look into help for understanding and assistance in managing this situation. DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP! Parents need to be parents, and children need to learn what respect is.

Answer 4

It pretty much comes down to being a teen, I was the same way, still am sometimes. Even the slightest little thing will set a teen off, no matter how ridiculous the situation is.

Answer 5

It's normal. He doesn't sound very cunning or manipulative though considering that you can see exactly what he's doing. Now, if you didn't notice and he was getting what he wanted, then I'd see a problem either with his ability to manipulate or your ability to ignore your child.

Answer 6

Normal but sounds like he has been use to this pattern for awhile. I wouldn't call it a phase, if you think hard he has probably done this all his life. Been nice for candy, acted out when you said no? The main thing is don't give in just because you don't want to see him mad or want to make him happy. That is feeding in to the pattern of behaviour. If he wants to go rock climbing and you think he shouldn't but he may get mad at you, stick to your guns and say no. Rather had a mad kid, than one with a broken leg. (Just an example)

Answer 7

ur son is normal im 19 years old and i some times still want everything my way and am not happy i got it at all ...its just that growing up age give it a few years and will all get bad or worse that's all on how u raise him .... but as long as he gets punish for something bad he does he will grow up sooner or later then u will be wishing he was his old moody self

Answer 8

I too have a 14yr old boy and no, he is just like my son and many of my friends sons as well asi too have asked this question of my friends w/ similar aged kids.

Hormones are running wild thru their bodies and they don't know how to control them so they just do whatever it is they feel which is usually rotten.

So just appreciate the time that he is 'normal'and when he isn't try to sit him down andtell him his attitude needs to change, a good old fashioned spanking helps my son to adjust his attitude aswell.

Answer 9

He obviously has mood swings. Don't think he's manipulating just because he's in a good mood, that's projecting. Most all teens are angry at the world at some point.

Answer 10

It's normal behavior. If he wants to act like he's two then treat him like he's two! Let him throw the temper tantrums!