My stepmother passed away Monday.?

Question

My younger stepsister refuses to share any information and won't let me help make any decisions. I am the oldest stepson. My half brother and I have the same father. My stepsister and half brother have the same mother. My stepsister and half brother are in the will and on the checking account. My stepsister has been spending money like it is going out of style. She offered a year and a half ago to split everything four ways. My sister and I are the stepchildren. My stepsister has been out of state for 25 years. About a month ago my stepmother had me store her bed at my house. She told me to take good care of it and I told her I would and I am. My stepsister hasn't talked to me since Monday. She called today wanting the bed. I haven't asked about the will or the money or anything. I want to keep the bed because it is all I may have to remember my stepmother by. She told me to take care of it after all. Should I give the bed back and be screwed out of everything?

My mom needed a hospital bed at the end and she didn't have room to store her bed herself.

Answer 1

First of all, please accept my condolances on the loss of your step mother, as well as the regretable behavior of your siblings.
That said, please, for the sake of your inner peace, do some hard thinking. Which is more important to you - preserving your mothers memory, or saving a relationship with your siblings, and are they mutually exclusive?
Then ask the hard questions. Get a lawyer to help you execute her will and resolve the estate. Put a freeze on the bank accounts and property so that things can be divided fairly and according to the will. That will go a long way to ease the tension, becuase it dictates your mothers last wishes. She may have willed specific items to certain people, or named an executor to be in charge.
Also, talk to your family. Try to use this as a bonding experience to bring you closer, not drive you apart or cause an arguement. Im sure you are all greiving and hurting, so try to remember that, and act honorably. Im sure your mother would want you all to get along and resolve things peacefully. Tell them why you are feeling the way you do, and why the bed is meaningful. Hopefully they are understanding, and if not, that is what the laywer and will is for, to equally divide the estate up. Good luck, and once again, Im sorry.

Answer 2

I'm sorry for your loss. Hope you have the strenght to go through it or to seek professional help with your grief if needed.

Your stepsister lost her mother and now is not the best time to expect her to be reasonable, she's grieving.

Tell her you are keeping the bed for sentimental reasons, she already got everything else. But try to do it calmly and don's get into an argument with her, don't make it sound like you resent her for getting everything (your stepmother should have split everything after she offered)Try to offer your shoulder to cry on, just be firm in telling her your stepmother gave it to you and you are keeping it.

If its alot of money and she has been your stepmother for a long time maybe after the grief she'll be reasonable and share it if not life goes on. GOOD LUCK.

Answer 3

Im sorry for your loss, i hope everything goes ok and your doing good. i know how hard it is to loose a loved one and you need to have family around you to support you and all i would keep the bed and ask your step sister to come over so you guys can talk maybe she is just depressed that her mother died just talk and figure everything out good luck

Answer 4

give the bed back and appear in probate court. your stepsister may be overstepping her bounds, but the best way to hande it is through the court system.

Answer 5

Don't give her the bed and find out what is in the will. It sounds like she is clearing the house out.

Answer 6

Keep the bed, by all means, and GET A LAWYER.

Answer 7

Keep the bed, tell her she cant have it

Answer 8

may her soul rest in peace

Answer 9

i feel your grief and offer my most honest and deepest symphathy

Answer 10

srry