13 month old never sits still - throwing tantrums?

Question

Okay - my 13 month old son never sits still for one minute. I try to hold him in my lap so we can read a book and he starts screaming he wants down. I hold him down when changing his diaper he squirms and starts crying. He has fits in his car seat if hes in it for more than 5 minutes. Its getting frustrating and Im not sure if this is a behavioral issue or not - most people I ask are friends or family and they just say hes a very active child and theres nothing wrong - I dont know if theyre just being nice or what. Maybe someone can give me some advise?.

Answer 1

i would think that at this age, he should be able to sit still for a few minutes, while reading a book etc,,,,,, but there are the rare children who do not like to be held/contained,,,, what i would do,,,, is to try at a time you think he may be tired,, before nap time, work on him letting you hold him to read , set a timer, you can get an inexpensive one like a kitchen timer,, set it for one minute,,,,, try to work up to him sitting for that amount of time,,,,,,beforehand, show him the timer first, explain it to him, show him how it buzzes, speak to him like he understands,, once he sits for one minute, the next week move up to two, next week move up to 3,,,,,, while he may be very active, this is also the time you start teaching them, in slow small steps,,,, to conform to life, and there will be sometimes he simply will need to be able to sit still,,, so i would start with the reading, timing, then move it to other times/activities that require sitting,,,,, if nothing works, discuss it with your pediatrician

Answer 2

I'm a mother. A 3 yr old and a 4/mo old and everyone always tells me I got lucky because my children are mild mannered and my three year old is very polite,etc. she rarely has at tantrum. My friend has 2 kids the same age and they Both are the opposite of my the kids. She always says I don't understand and I just got lucky and she didn't. I think it's a bunch of crap. ALL children at some point have tantrums mostly at your sons age and mostly to see if they can do it and get thier way. My 3yr. old tried the same thing and we would punish her. NOT BEAT HER OR ANYTHING, but a punishment suited for what she did. Grabbing things after bieng told no--gets your hand smaked hard enough to feel, but not hard enough to hurt just shock them really. going where your told not to-- stand in the corner or time out ( they hate having to sit still so this works well) Back talking was my 3yr old fav. so she would get her butt smacked ( she had a diaper at the time so it never really hurt) but it got the point across. Never give them things without them asking the right way Can I please not give me! It sounds worse than what it is,but most people were punished at some point in your life and you didn't like it and niether do they. My friends kids are brats because she NEVER punishes them and she says I'm to hard on mine. There is nothing wrong with having polite children who listen and don't throw fits when your out and my experience a time out or butt smaked sometimes worked for us. Think about it would you rather be out with friends and family and have to listen to a child have a tantrum or sit there politely and play. My kids have fun we aren't so strict that they can't do anything but they know when its excepted and when it's not. Sounds like your family is partially right you have an active child so instead do active things with him rather than read and reserve that for night time. But for other things a stern no and a time out or whatever you feel comfortable with will go a long way, it might take a while but he's not to young like most people tell me. most say I expect to much and then in the same sentence say your children are great and well behaved.

Answer 3

Yes, he is a baby, but he's not stupid. Even now he is picking up on things like who's in control and when you're stressed and all that kind of stuff. Kids are soo preceptive, even as infants.
This might seen harsh, but remember who is the parent and who is the cute lil child. I work with kids all the time...don't have any of my own just yet. In many homes accross North America, the kids are telling the parent show to act and behaive. Practice with him...if you don't want him to freak out wile in the car or whatever, teach him to sit still at home when he doesn't "have" to. Reward him for obeying and sitting still. Don't bribe the lil guy, but reward him when he does what you ask, and reward him when he doesn't. By "reward" for the second, I mean like take something away for something.
If he won't sit still now, do you really think that he'll do it when he is bigger than you?
You can do it! Good luck!!

Answer 4

This sounds as normal as normal can be. It sounds like he just needs more exciting activities to sit rather than a book. Children at this age love gooey messy activities. Try sitting him at the table with a bowl of water and measuring cups or some finger paints. When my daughter was that age she was the same way. I use to put flour in a bowl with a few drops of food coloring give her another bowl with only enough water to make the flour doughy not liquidy. She would sit long enough for me to throw a load in the washer and get my dishes done. You just have to find an activity he enjoys while sitting.

Answer 5

nothing wrong, just very active, just accept it now because there is nothing you can do about it. You can start training him to be able to sit still in a few months though. Put a blanket on the ground and tell him he must remain on the blanket and read books with you for 20 minutes traight every night no matter what. This may help him learn to stay still when it is important to do so.

Answer 6

OH MY GOD!!! i thought my son was the only kid that got on that way he is 14 months and he cant sit still not even to eat but dont worry boys are really active he will grow out of it right now i usually am running behind my son all the time cus he's always going under beds and climbing on things i dont mind the activity so much its just that i am afraid he hurts himself. Just hang in there and dont get mad or shout at him ok he's at at a stage and he's going to be there for a while to come

Answer 7

My son is 20 months and has been doing the exact same thing since about 13 months too.He fights me about getting his diaper changed,and getting dressed, and eating and car seat.I am one tired and frustrated mommy by the end of the day.
I ignore him-if I tell him no or make a big deal out of it the problem only gets worse.He like to make me mad I think and he loves to test me.It truly is a phase he must outgrow-and I am looking forward to the day my son outgrows it.I hope it is really soon too because I am 30 weeks pregnant with another boy.

Answer 8

I would say this is probably pretty normal. You don't want to start putting him on drugs (like for ADHD) do you? Obviously the book is not getting his attention - try ones that have touchy feeling/interactive stimulation; give him something to hold onto/play with while you're changing his diaper and buy some type of toy attachment for the car seat. Sounds like a normal active boy...get used to it and be glad he's active! :)

Answer 9

It's normal at this age. ADHD or ADD can't be legitimately diagnosed until a child is about 8, so don't let people steer you in that direction. Instead of trying to sit him still, toss him on the bed and wrestle with him, chase him through the house and when you catch him, tickle him and then run away so he chases you, go outside and blow bubbles and chase them, kick a ball around with him. Let him burn off some of that steam. There's nothing wrong with your child, he's just bizzy.

Answer 10

First of all, you need to make sure he is not sick. I would take him to his doctor and have him completely checked over so you are confident there is nothing medically wrong with him.

Then I would look at his diet. Is he Hungary? Is he getting enough to eat and drink? What type of food is he eating? Is he getting a balanced diet? Food can have a lot to do with a child's behavior.

He is too young to be having "temper tantrums". There is something wrong with him. He is very uncomfortable for some reason. You need to see his doctor as soon as possible.

I read all the answers above mine. PLEASE do not put your son on drugs. There is no such thing as ADD or ADHD. It is a cop out when parents and doctors don't want to deal with the behavior problems. Drug them and they will behave is a crime and a sin.
It is not NORMAL for your son to act like that. It is not normal for a two year old to run the household. Children are not supposed to run around acting like animals and destroying a house or anything else. They are not supposed to jump on furniture. They are not supposed to talk back to people. They are not supposed to hit others. They are not supposed to abuse animals by hitting or kicking them. They are not supposed to yell and scream when they don't get something in a store. Parents do not like this behavior in their children, so there must be a problem. Let's try drugs to calm them down.

The problem is the parents.......It is called time. If you choose to have children, you must be prepared to spend TIME with them You as a parent are the leader and the guide. YOU teach that child how to act and respond. The child does not know what is expected of him/her UNLESS you show them. It is like the father that punishes the son by beating him for hitting another kid. He says to his son, "That will teach you not to hit anyone again." I don't know about you but as a child I would not get that lesson.

It just upsets me when people think children are children when they act naughty and the parents think it is normal. If the parents don't condone the bad behavior, they put the kid on drugs.

A child can be a joy to spend time with when the parents have spent time parenting the child.