My boyfriend and I were chillin with some friends last night and we ended up play fighting. But, it wasn't really that fun. I put up my fists like we were going to spar and my boyfriend grabs both of my wrists and turns them backwards away from their natural movement. I screamed "Ow, Ow Ow!" but he didn't let go until I said "that hurts asshole!" So I took both of my red wrists and slammed the bedroom door and said "you should have stopped when I said Ow the first time" He then comes into the room and violently grabs my right wrist saying "let me see" hurting it again. Is this phyiscal abuse? Do I really need to ask? He did it in front of other people too.
2006-12-15 03:08:52 · 44 answers · asked by rchl782 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Let me just say, there is a pattern. A Couple of weeks ago we had a fight over my cell phone and he started pushing me around. Well, push came to shove and I ended up with three broken nails, a lamp got knocked over, and the ashy tray got spilled in my bed. Yet, he was fine. He is also a good 120 Lbs hearvier than me.
2006-12-15 03:29:04 · update #1
That is a sign of physical abuse. Even for play fighting it isn't that nessarsary to get that rough.
2006-12-15 03:13:09 · answer #1 · answered by Crazy K. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend and I were chillin with some friends last night and we ended up play fighting. But, it wasn't really that fun. I put up my fists like we were going to spar ...
You consented to the play fight. He may have gotten a little rough but it isn't physical abuse. You're being too sensitive on this particular occasion.
The second time he grabbed your wrists is a different matter. that time he reacted out of anger. That's very concerning and is a type of physical abuse.
2006-12-15 03:15:00 · answer #2 · answered by JB 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first time is questionable since you were play fighting, and yes, he should have let go with the first "ow". Now as for the second time in the bedroom, yes, that is abuse and he can be charged with it. The first time, he could claim that he was playing and did not know his own strength and got carried away, but for for the second time, he has no defense.
2006-12-15 03:14:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He should never restrain you against your will, he was guilt of deprivation of liberty by holding you and keeping your 'phone from you. After 5 years, you may not want to break up over one incident, but it's important that you have a serious talk to him about it when you are both calm. Explain that felt frightened by it and that you can't be with someone who treats you in this manner. Don't shout, listen to each other and talk it through. If he gets abusive walk out.
2016-05-24 20:34:23 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your boyfriend needs help NOW. The playing rough can sometimes end with hurt feelings with no abuse intended or present but going back for seconds with no sympathy for what just took place in front of others can backfire on him and the end could be bad for all involved including him. I say this from experience, tell him to attend angermanegment before he or someone else ends up really hurt or imprisoned or even with a criminal record. Domestic violence is a felony and if persude by you it could cause severe detremint to his future
2006-12-15 03:22:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like at first it wasn't physical abuse. My husband does that to me, but only because he knows that when I want him to stop I start saying ''ow'', and he won't let go until I start screaming at him.
And you probly hurt his feelings when you called him an asshole, not saying he didn't deserve it, and when he grabbed your wrist again, he was probly upset with himself that he hurt you, and didnt mean to hurt you again, but wasn't thinking, or wasn't thinking he hurt you as bad as you said.
I'd tell him not to do it again, or ''else", whatever you want to tell him. Teach him that hurting you has it's consequences, and not just you yelling at him. Trust me, I know from experience, that doesn't work. And don't use something like ''no sex, no massages'' or whatever. Nothing simple. Use something that's going to make him think twice about doing it again.
If he does it again, leave for a few hours. Don't call him, don't tell him where you're going, don't answer your phone if he calls. That's pretty much the only way that you're going to be able to stop him from doing it.
However if it progresses into actual hitting, I'd leave his *** as soon as I could! I know what it's like to afraid of someone, having to worry about if they're going to hit you for no reason, or because you piss him off. It isn't healthy, litterally. I got sick alot and the doctor told me one time, that my sickness was due to much stress, or worry. So you need to keep an eye on things, and if it looks like it's getting worse, duck out and leave!!
2006-12-15 03:19:20 · answer #6 · answered by Pluto 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something like that happened to me long ago with an ex. Actually the same thing with 2 exes. One was violent on a different occasion and I hit him back. But in both instances I playfully hit the guy on the upper arm, girlish hard and they hit me back boyish hard. "OUCH, M.F.!!!" I don't think THAT qualified as physical abuse per se, but it is emotionally hard and makes you cry. I wouldn't call the police, but I'd have a serious talk with lots of warnings involved. Boys will be boys but keep an eye on that dude.
2006-12-15 03:13:47 · answer #7 · answered by Sleek 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Same thing happened to me with my Ex. We started out play fighting and before it was over with, he grabbed both my wrists really tight. I acted like I was going to kick him in the nuts, he let one of my wrists go to protect himself. With my free hand, I broke his nose. I think it's kind of a "control" thing for some guys. It can be labeled physical abuse. Talk to him, let him know how it made you feel. If he don't care, then I would be moving on. It's likely to happen again. Don't let any man treat you like that. It's one thing I will not tolerate....hence the other guy being an "ex". Stand up for yourself hon, if you don't, who will? Good luck!!
2006-12-15 03:20:04 · answer #8 · answered by Crystal 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yes!!!!!!!!!! you need to do something fast break up with him and turn him in because i dont want what happened to my friend happen to you...
my friend had this bf that would hit her and stuff and she didnt tell me until i saw her writs were red and stuff and i asked what happened and she wouldnt tell me and then she was in the hospital because it got worse he tried to strangle her and i knew what was going on but she made me promise not to say anything that he promised to stop..so i didnt do anything and then the next week she gets out of the hospital i went to her house to see her the front door was open and no car was there and then i went to her room and i found her on the bed dead with a note saying haha the b**** actually thought i loved her...
and i called the cops and they said he left the state... i will never forgive myself for that plz do something!!!!!!!!
2006-12-15 03:18:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you might need to tell him that he really hurt you, because he seems kind of slow, like he is not understanding the words ow, then again he might be trying to see how much he can get away with you. Be careful.
2006-12-15 03:13:03 · answer #10 · answered by Ms. Q 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋