I have been with my man 8 years now; we have lived 2gether all 8. Ever since we've been 2gether, he's had a drinking & gambling problem. He used 2 have a crack problem, but I think he quit; however, lots of time when I come home from work, he's not home & I notice things missing (usually electronics) & he won't answer his cell & he don't end up coming home til after 2 o' clock in the morning. When I ask him his whereabouts or whut happened 2 my stuff, he lies: won't tell me hwere he was & claims he hadn't seen whut I know he took. Then he calls ME names!!! Go figure. I'm the 1 who should b mad, not him. He don't like the fact that I work in a topless club, but I am just doing it until I graduate from college b/c I can't live off a part-time job. That's the only thing "bad" he can say about me. Ok, now he DOES pay me back by buying me another of whutever he stole, but that's still no way 2 live!! HELP!!
2006-12-15 02:24:25 · 14 answers · asked by Miss B 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Honestly but what I'm reading, you are pretty close to (if not already) leading the american white trash lifestyle. Gambling, drugs, stripping, stealing, lying.....?!?!
is this the life you saw and hoped for yourself as a child?
Move on, get a good job, ditch the alcoholic, utilize your college degree, and start out with a clean slate.
(it's probably not what you wanted to hear, but the truth hurts)
2006-12-15 02:26:46 · answer #1 · answered by Lost In Vast 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is NOT going to be simple....you need help....maybe Al-Anon (see below) or someone else that helps people with abusive, additive spouse...You are enabling him (propping him up)....
If, you want peace, happiness you must first SAVE yourself....
You, can't SAVE someone else
Leave, get some counseling and Join a church...
It not easy leaving someone you love but you deserve someone who will LOVE you too...right now he love Crack, Liquor, Gambling....YOU need to LOVE you and Leave. Good Luck and God bless.
2006-12-15 02:44:19 · answer #2 · answered by Lovely B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes loosing something dear and close to you in the midst of a problem (such as drinkin gamblin') helps a person come to grips with reality and see the error of their ways and try to correct it
2006-12-15 02:27:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are in an unhealthy relationship so it is best that you go. I am sure that you love him but it is effecting you in more ways that you can know. Find yourself someone with less issues and make a happy life together
2006-12-15 02:27:50 · answer #4 · answered by Mike 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to quote you (I hate it when people use my words against me...) but, "but that's still no way 2 live." You said it yourself. Having your significant other steal things from you...then "pay you back." Wow. If you feal that you've done everything you can to help him change....then maybe you're right: you've done everything you can. Maybe it time to cut the losses and begin anew?
2006-12-15 02:32:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your man has a serious problem and needs counseling. he is taking your stuff to a pawn shop more than likely to get money to support his habit. have you thought about telling this joe to take a hike and move on with your life. you deserve better
2006-12-15 02:32:13 · answer #6 · answered by ken s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have no choice you can't go on living like this, He is not going to change as you can see after 8yrs, You must move on for your own good.
2006-12-15 02:28:09 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i've been in this position before, but i was the one who had the drink problem, my fiance ( now ex) try to get thru to me and help me but i was so wrapped up in my own life i wouldn't listen. in the end she dumped me and kicked me out of the house. that turned out to be the kick up the **** i needed and has ultimately turned my life around. so my advice, even tho u love him you have to be tough and show him you mean buisness.
2006-12-15 02:30:12 · answer #8 · answered by little_coz 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to get professional help... even if you love him you cant live that way either he changes on his own or make him change.
2006-12-15 02:28:25 · answer #9 · answered by Manny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's not willing to help himself, you have to think of what's best for you. You will be so much happier not having to worry about him and when he's going to bankrupt you.
2006-12-15 02:27:57 · answer #10 · answered by Todd 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋