my boyfriend and i have been together for a month-- we havent done much (sexually) -- but he was very much so clingy. He seems to be too obessed by the very thoguht of me. He wants to spend every minute of everyday with me. But, im independant, and i request very little-- such as having my own space and free will to do wtv i plz-- he doesnt seem happy about that BUT i did tell him that before we went out. But, i hate breaking people's hearts. id like to know from you- what dyou think?! (detailed reasons would be great!) much thnx-
2006-12-15 01:23:26 · 12 answers · asked by SealedWithAKiss <3 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I wouldn't even characterize 1 month as a relationship! You are just dating him. And in the first few months of dating, people are deciding if they want to make it a long term relationship or not. It sounds like you have found some things about him that you don't like. For example, lack of sexual chemistry and his neediness. Maybe pass on this one!
2006-12-15 01:35:49 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Really that depends on how you feel. You haven't mentioned anything about your feelings for your boyfriend. All you have mentioned is that you're worried about breaking his heart if you break up with him. If this is your main concern you should end it because that isn't a real reason to stay with him. If you care for him and can see a future together, then sit down and talk to him about the problems you're having before taking drastic action and ending it! He's probably quite insecure. Just tell him that you like your own space, its nothing to do with him, you just need the odd evening to yourself. See how things go from there. However, if you really don't see things developing any further, then again, the best option would be to end it. Hope this helps! You might like to consider why you feel so desperate to hold on to your Independence - one day you might have to share your life with someone and that's very special.
2006-12-15 01:44:17 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Please get out now... before you begin to care about him and its too late. My friends boyfriend is really clingy and possesive, theyve been together a year now and he has slowly turned her against her friends and family so she just needs him, and he can be with her all the time. The bottom line is, and for me, if a guy is clingy he doesnt care about you, love is not about owning one another, its about looking at someone and realising how lucky you are that they came your way. I think the deepest kind of love is the one where people trust each other, they have their own lives and they are together because that is the best thing in the world, not because they need each other. He is making you unhappy, and the longer you are with him the harder it will be to break up.
2006-12-15 01:49:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If someone is too clingy at the beginning of a relationship, something is WRONG. take a few steps backwards, think about the various times you have been together and try to piece together some things and comments.
Think about this: has he had abandonment issues in the past? How does he get along with his mother? Does he need psychiatric help?
2006-12-15 01:28:49 · answer #4 · answered by Jennifer L 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
you don't have to leave him but you could tell hm that you need some space...tell hm he's too clingy and to cut you some slack...once he knows he will back of a bit, but i don't think finishing it will be the answer, if you like him, work on it and things will get better, it's only been a month, give it time, get to know him, he may be insecure over previous relationships he's had and may be scared to lose you too....just tell him in a nice way that you need time on your own every now and then
2006-12-15 01:30:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you want to be free to do whatever u please u shouldnt really have a bf, u should just date casually. I would tell him straight out right now that u want to take it slow and if u seem right for each other maybe something more will come of it. Don't lead him into thinking u are ready for a commited relationship because I don't think u are.
2006-12-15 02:24:10 · answer #6 · answered by Amber 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i suggest you sit down and talk to him, tell him how your feeling, leaving him may be a bit dramatic for something like this, sit down and let him listen to your needs, and you listen to his too, then draw a conclusion up and decide on what to do, explain to him you need your space and if he loves you he'll understand, if you told him before you went out, then just remind him again, you need to comunicate, once you do, trust me, things will get better :) good luck
2006-12-15 01:49:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think one month is so little for you to call it a relationship. Moreover, you have seen some thing you don't like then tell him and hear from him.
2006-12-15 01:48:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he seems to be very insecure so this may be a difficult one for you to handle.
try a few subtle hints like saying "i like to have my own space sometimes, what about you?"
be honest tell him by him wanting to be so close to you is pushing you away!!!!
he will soon get the hint!!
2006-12-15 01:53:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wot makes u think ul break his heart?? get over urself!
maybe hes just being clingy so that u think hes nice and attentive and ul sleep with him
2006-12-15 02:03:29 · answer #10 · answered by kitten 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋