My daughter came home from school yesterday having heard someone say there was a serial killer about (referring of course to recent events in Ipswich) and then saw the headlines in my newspaper and asked us what a serial killer was. We replied that it wasn't something she needed to know. She then asked if it was to do with killing tigers and when we asked her where she got that idea from she said they had asked their PE teacher and he had told them that a serial killer killed tigers. She was very doubtful about that reply though. Now she won't leave it alone and has asked constantly.
How do we reply? She has so far had a very sheltered upbringing and I want it to stay that way for the time being. I remember when I was 8 hearing on the news about the Black panther murderer and I had nightmares about it for years and it still haunts me to this day and I don't want my daughter to have a similar experience.
2006-12-14 20:39:29 · 33 answers · asked by happy 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
Tell her the truth, always the truth.
Or else, how is she to believe her parents?
You don't need to go into a lot of details, just keep it simple.
Sorry but the PE teacher sounds like a fool!
2006-12-15 00:46:38 · answer #1 · answered by Yellowstonedogs 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Children at this age will ask questions that we as parents are sometimes unable to answer. The thing you have to do is not to avoid the issue but to address the issue.
This is the perfect opportunity to teach your daughter that there is safety in numbers. Stranger = Danger and ideas of that nature. You and your hubby made a major mistake when you told her she doesn't need to know.
To correct this error, I would sit her down and explain to her that there are bad people out there that would hurt someone else because the want to and like to for no reason what so ever.
Then reinforce that with telling her to not be out later than x o'clock and make sure you give her a time. That she should never walk alone, always with a freind. If that is not possible to not walk into areas that are dark or alleys always stay to public streets and walkways. Never ever take shortcuts. You never know where those will lead.
2006-12-15 01:42:51 · answer #2 · answered by mikeae 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would simply define the word "serial" as something that happens repeatedly (or even look it up in the dictionary with her). Then ask her what she thinks a serial killer is, based on her new knowledge. If she knows what someone who is a killer does, she should be able to put 2 and 2 together by herself, and then you'll probably get a whole series of new questions that will most likely start with, "Why would someone do that?", to which you can in all honesty reply "I don't know, his brain must not work right, because normal people don't act that way."
2006-12-14 21:02:56 · answer #3 · answered by Stacy Cuccia 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I know we all want to protect our kids for all the ugly thing's in the world and these day's it seems like there's more then ever. But some time's we just have to give them a very little bit of the truth.
I'd just tell her that a serial killer is a very bad person and they hurt Lot's of people. With that if she's anything like my 5year old then she'll want to know if he's gonna hurt her. That's where me and my husband tell our daughter that she doesn't need to worry about that because mommy and daddy our here to protect her and that it's our job to keep her safe and we would never let anything happen to her. Hopefully this will help you with your daughter. Good Luck.
2006-12-15 00:42:03 · answer #4 · answered by jenpoesavon 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You tell her the truth, for the truth will keep her safe. Knowing there are bad people out there is a good thing, thinking that people are nice is dangerous. You'll be doing her a favor if she is a little wary of strangers... think about it! You don't have to get graphic, but be honest and sincere. Seven is not too young to have some idea that the world is all sunshine and roses, if she goes anywhere at any time without complete adult supervision, it is not too early at all. Think about it. You aren't doing her favors keeping her sheltered, she'll still have a happy childhood even if she knows HOW TO KEEP SAFE!!!! Give her the gift of knowledge and saftey, not ignorance!
2006-12-14 20:43:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
I answered this question for my 8 year old just a couple weeks ago..
A serial killer is a crazy person who kills people in a certain way, or for a reason that makes sense only to him.
2006-12-15 01:25:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her that a serial killer is a bad person (man or woman) who just kills because they want to. BUT it's safe and mommy and daddy won't let anyone hurt her etc...WHY would a gym teacher EVEN open their mouths about that?! I swear school needs to keep in mind ~ they are helping form young minds...lying to them isn't the way!
2006-12-15 00:01:50 · answer #7 · answered by just me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
unfortunately because of the media and other things, children hear about things we may not want them to have to deal with. I remember here in the States, when 9-11 happened, they were actually showing footage in some of the classrooms. to me, appalling, but it happened. I myself have a 7 yr old and when he asks questions, I try to explain to him without being too graphic. I might explain that a sex offender is an adult that does very bad things to children, or a serial killer is someone that hurts people. I try to leave out the gory details, but I also don't want him to grow up and not have a clue about the world around him either. if they think everything is all candy canes and puppy dog tails, that makes them prime targets for the evil people in the world to prey on. They have to have some sort of fear of strangers, therefore you might want to gently explain that there are very bad people in the world that do very bad things and to be very careful about whom they trust and go with.
2006-12-14 20:46:12 · answer #8 · answered by Michele A 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
tough question... I highly recommend honesty...If she ends up asking some one else and they give her more graffic details u will be sorry...Now that she knows it is something that adults know she will make it a quest for answers.... I taught kinder kids at the time of 9 11 and had to deal with alot of questions.... I think it is also best for kids to discuss things that may be in the media and unsettling for them... Best thing i can think of one of your other people pretty much said the same thing... Tell her that there are bad people out there that have hurt some people. Give her examples of bad people that she would know of, ie robbers. etc so she can put it togehter in her head. You dont have to get to specifics of murdering people.... Honesty is always best.. Good luck...As the world is a only getting worse she will have to deal with much more in not to many years to come. make sure she feels safe also and tell her that this will not affect her in any way..
2006-12-14 22:09:57 · answer #9 · answered by charger69golf 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
will , first of all i think that the PE teacher was wrong about killing tigers, because telling children lies would maybe teach them that lieing is the best thing that parents or teachers can do ,why don't you tell her the truth ? i think it is better to tell the truth , because she needs to know that kind of things . i know you think that she is still a little gal but , ( epically ) girls need to know all about those things.
tell her that a serial killer is a bad man who hates every one and kills every one and that he will be busted one day , and that she should not worry about that.
2006-12-14 20:53:23 · answer #10 · answered by Donets'k 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be honest with your daughter and reassure her that she will be safe. if you sugar coat it she will only find out from someone else eventually and then wonder why you lied and it will confuse her more. she may get the answer from another teacher or adult kids never give up till they get the answer they feel they need. explain to her what a serial killer is and then why they might do this and let her know she is safe with you.
2006-12-14 20:45:47 · answer #11 · answered by njredgrl32 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋