As fat as...?

Question

help me think of funny metaphors that are decriptive.

like,
• she was all over him like white on rice
• that dude is nuttier than a squirrels turd
• gotta pee worse than a kid in the back of a station wagon on the way to disneyland

10 points goes to the most creative one, taking into consideration thumbs up and downs.

it doesn't HAVE to be about being fat, just whatever metaphor you like to share.

Answer 1

nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs

Answer 2

The 'WALK'. How can I explain it so you will understand the intensity of it? Have you ever walked past a bakery and the aroma suddenly caused an overwhelming desire for bread? A desire that had not been there a moment before. A passion that caused you to believe if you didn't try for the bread you would regret it all your life.
Soft, hot, fresh, pliant, tasty, mouth-watering, deliciously satisfying - bread. You knew if you got it, it would be the best bread you ever had in your mouth. And you would forever thank God for giving you taste buds. That was her 'WALK', only it wasn't selling bread.
Some of the followers, dead men actually, were foolish enough to think the 'WALK' was for them. They quicken their pace and got in her wake as she crossed the room.
The first stepped in front of her and flashed his very expensive, pearly, white, dentist altered, always makes the young ones cream, smile at her. She stopped and glared. I could see two tiny red dots appearing on the back of his head as her stare went through him. Without a word he slunk away and hid.
Others tried. Without missing a step her blue eyes stuck a dagger in each gossamer male ego and like a tiger trapped in tissue paper, ripped it to shreds. She had a purpose and nothing was going to interfere. They fell without a sound. Crumpled heaps of testosterone desperately trying to retrieve their scrotums from whatever orifice it had retreated into for shelter. I counted six before the others wised up and let her pass undisturbed. She stopped a few feet in front of us ... him.
The gaggle of girls, laughing and talking, parted as if she were Moses and they were the Red Sea. One by one they detected her presence.. like an itching on the back of the neck when the little red light from a laser scope finds you. Even though they were young they knew the rules of the pack. Leave or die. They chose to leave.

Answer 3

OKAY THIS IS IMPORATAN metaphors can't use like or as...

EX.

A metaphor= The man was a fox

A simile= The man was like a fox

Answer 4

Fat as an elephant loose in a peanut warehouse.

Answer 5

Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its other two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
McMurphy fell twelve stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
Long seperated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m., travelling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m., at a speed of 35 mph.
The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr. Pepper can.
They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.
John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
The thunder was ominous sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.
The red brick wall was the color of a brick-red Crayola crayon.
He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.
Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long it had rusted shut.
The door had been forced, as forced as the dialogue during the interview portion of Jeopardy.
Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical kind of lame duck either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
Her artistic sense was exquisitely refined, like someone who can tell butter from "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter."
She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
The knife was as sharp as the tone used by Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee (D-Tex.) in her first several points of parliamentary procedure made to Rep. Henry Hyde (R-Ill.) in the House Judiciary Committee hearings on the impeachment of President William Jefferson Clinton.
It came down the stairs looking very much like something no one had ever seen before.
The ballerina rose gracefull en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
The dandelion swayed in the gentle breeze like an oscillating electric fan set on medium.
It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
Her eyes were like limpid pools, only they had forgotten to put in any pH cleanser.
She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli and he was room-temperature Canadian Beef.
She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
Her voice had that tense, grating quality, like a first generation termal paper fax machine that needed a band tightened.
AND THE BEST ONE: It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.

Answer 6

AS FAT AS AN PICKLED PIG

Answer 7

as active as an owl early morning.....

Answer 8

hmmm... sorry i dont have much imagination.....

Answer 9

She was all over him like......stink on sh*t................