you have always had low self esteem and every man in your life has emotionally abused you starting with your father? I really seriously want to break this life long pattern but dont know where to start. I know deep down I am worth more but the thoughts in my mind keep telling that I am worthless. Is it possible to ever gain a higher self esteem? Serious answers only please. I dont need to be belittled anymore.
2006-12-14 15:34:41 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
my step father had a true passion of hate for me. He told me every day how much he did not like me. He was my step dad since I was 4. Because he was in my life at an early age I loved him like a father. This man I know as a father figure tells me he hates me?
He really hated me so bad he would hit me tell me I was fat and ugly. I had the lowest self esteem ever. I was only 5'8 and 115 pounds.
When I was 16 my step dad burned our home so we would have nothing. My mother did not even have a job. And as for how ugly I was I dated some of the hottest jocks in our 5A school. My husband Played football and was one of the most popular guys at our school. We are married and have a beautiful girl and looking back now at what my step father said to me it is like a joke. I know I am not fat, my daughter has won beauty pageants and people say she looks just like me. It make my day every time someone says she looks like me. Because of one person don't let it get you down. Some people feel better about them self if they make others feel bad. I am so sorry this is happening to you.
My mom is even remarried to a great guy we go to their house every week to visit them.
My point is this don't let the opinion of a few get you down. Great guys are out their. My mother and I both went years of living with a mean guy who had lots of hate and now we are both doing great.
Where to start write down everything good about yourself. Go have fun with friends. go and get a makeover a fresh new start. Rember to think positive thoughts about your self. you are worth it. when you think bad thoughts bout yourself it can be worse than someone saying it because when you think it you start to belive it. If you start to think great thoughts about yourself your spirits will lift and you will see a happy person.
2006-12-14 15:40:58 · answer #1 · answered by Erika B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes you can beat this. Some people just arent as assertive as others or are alittle more laid back and that doesnt mean you have a low self esteem. Anyways, get involved w/something you love and really like or are good at and give it your all. Accomplishments can help you feel better about your self. Go get a dazzling new look. Get a make over to perk up your personality and to make yourself feel good. Get rid of anybody that makes you feel worthless...they will only destroy what your trying to accomplish. Keep your head up high, chin up, shoulders back, belly sucked in, and walk briskly w/pride. People will look at you differantly that way. Smile and make eye contact. Dont be intimidated. (easier said then done) Think of your strong traits or what you like about yourself besides what anyone else has said in the past and be proud of it. Get involved w/society and be active...you will meet lots of people who will appreciate you for you and help you feel better about yourself. Look in the mirror and tell yourself you love you and your beautiful over and over again w/o thinking of anything you dont like. Get your mind working in the positive direction. Always think positive no matter the situation and this will help. Good luck.
2006-12-14 23:44:58 · answer #2 · answered by Ivory_Flame 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well you know deep down youre worth more, and thats a start. It must be hard given your past. You are definately worth more, and I think that because you went through this, you especially can grow stronger from these experiences and feel GREAT about yourself. Just get up tomorrow morning, and make up your mind that no one is allowed to bring you down any more!!! Write "GOOD MORNING BEAUTIFUL" in lipstick on your mirror so you wake up to it every morning. EXCERCISE. Its been proven that it makes your self confidence go way up!! This is not something that you need to sink into slowly, this is a decision you need to make for yourself, and make a dramatic change, and you CAN do it!!
2006-12-14 23:41:16 · answer #3 · answered by Christines256 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is always hope , and always a way to change as long as you are still breathing .
Go to the book store and get some self help books . I like Wayne Dyer best of all .
Also learn to meditate . There are all kinds of soothing tapes at the Library or book store .
Find someone to talk to also . Just one or two at the most , people tend to take our happiness away without even realizing what they are doing .
2006-12-14 23:42:47 · answer #4 · answered by Geedebb 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Find something in life that you can accomplish completely by yourself. Whether it being accomplishing some type of higher learning or creating beautiful artwork.
Learn to use all the negative you've came across in your life to make you stronger. I really believe that we all go through certain things in life to prepare us for something bigger and better. We all have a purpose, we all are uniquely beautiful, and we all carry many different talents. Focus on finding your meaning in this world and using it.
2006-12-14 23:43:30 · answer #5 · answered by ▒♥▒♥▒♥▒♥▒™ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What your father did to you, yes, emotionally and mentally hurts you. And if you know your better than that, look across the line. You dont know where life can lead you. Can you go live with one of your family members. Never give up! If you have dreams go for it! Life is to short to live it in agony! Best wishes to ya!
2006-12-14 23:39:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are the only one responsible for your own happiness.Alot of people think I am conceided,however I just genuinely like myself.If you treat others well be content with that and dont try to make them like you.You are as good as anyone else;just approach 1 day with confidence and seehow different everyones reactions are.And if they think your brash than screw'm.You are
2006-12-14 23:45:57 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well .. in time with lots of love and affection you can
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2006-12-14 23:40:25 · answer #8 · answered by dana brown 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋