Me and my girlfriend have been going out for 11 months. We are serious, in college, and we even talked to eachothers parents about getting married. I love this girl to death shes beautiful, gorgeous, shy, cute, funny and dorky lol. We have been through a lot of things that made us stronger. Though something horrible happened today. I was at a friends house he had a get together and I drank a little. I was laying on the couch when my friend Rachel wanted me to go with her to get somethin from upstairs because she said she was scared. I NEVER thought of her doin anything with me she was a close friend. She started hitting on me and I said stop, then she took her top off and pushed me on the bed. She went straight to my pants and gave me head. I feel like utter ****, I feel like nothing, empty. I couldve stopped it but I didnt. I betrayed the girl Im going to marry, and I wish I could take it back. Im not talking to Rachel anymore. What should I do, I cant lose her and I made a mistake...
2006-12-14 14:00:50 · 12 answers · asked by 97254698 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
have never been in a more serious relationship then this and I really want to marry her. I dont wanna lose the girl of life because I did one extremely idiotic mistake. Im even praying to god for what I have done, I really dont want to lose her. Please help me.
2006-12-14 14:01:15 · update #1
Robert A and Dave Yours Truly, you guys are really helping me out. I really did not want this to happen and regret it sincerely. I talked to Rachel and told her I do not want to talk to her at all anymore, and I do not even want to see her. I told her dont wave hi to me, and deleted all ways of contact. My cell phone contract ends in a week so Im also getting an new number she wont get. I think Im going to take your guys advice and just forget this ever happened. I really dont want a stupid thing like this ruin something so much more amazing. Im 19, so after sitting down and thinking I realized I am still kind of young and I would rather have this happen now then when we were more serious in the future, or even worse when we get married. Im going to stop drinking and anytime a girl trys anything Im going to stop it. Ive truley learned from my mistakes, and I think all you guys should learn from mine lol. Dont let a dumb thing ruin the best thing thats ever happened to you.
2006-12-14 14:50:05 · update #2
Oh well.
YOU POOR GUY!
I feel SO sorry for you!
Seriously, I am sure the guilt you are feeling drowns out any pleasure you received.
But do not make the mistake of telling her about it.
If you do your relationship will never be the same.
And she will most likely want to get revenge by doing something similar with another guy.
So if any one ever mentions it. DENY,DENY,DENY.
After all you were drunk and do not remember anything.
TRUST ME ON THIS ONE, if you want to keep your relationship intact.
And stop feeling so guilty, think of it as a very early bachelor party
.
P.S.
I really do believe in being honest with your loved one.
But over the years I have seen so many perfectly good relationships go down the toilet because of this kind of confession. For one example my sister had something like this happen to her early in her marriage. And she thought honesty was the best policy so she told her husband about it.
He called her a whore and a slut in front of her kids and mutual Friends for 20 years until they finally divorced.
I could go on and on but I don't have that much time.
But I will tell you this! when a man confesses about this the woman will think in the back of her mind "If he can do it I can do it"
As well as making your life miserable as can be.
2006-12-14 14:03:29 · answer #1 · answered by Dave Yours Truly 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Be honest with your girlfriend and sincere when you say it was a stupid mistake, or you can just pretend it never happened and always have those awkward moments when you and your girl run into this friend of yours. Sounds like you really are regretting what you let happen.. Wouldn't she appreciate hearing it from you then hearing it from others? Just be honest and sincere and understand your gf will be pissed, but that is what you have to deal with for YOUR mistake
Good luck
2006-12-14 14:05:49 · answer #2 · answered by coolchica4u2000 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you're going to get blamed for eating some cake regardless if you didn't and had no intentions of doing so. Followed by being brow beaten for days on end, well then you may as well have a really big piece if the end result is going to be the same.
2016-05-24 17:39:07 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you're just young and haven't been seduced before. Just learn from it and don't allow it to surprise you again. You sound sincerely contrite to me and it doesn't sound like you've committed "adultery in your heart". Forget about it and stay away from Rachel is a good idea. Don't tell your gf because it'll only hurt her and you can't take it back anyway.
2006-12-14 14:11:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You think u cheated?! would u consider it cheating if ur gf let another give her head? u def cheated! and u could have stopped it but u didnt so something is obviously wrong with ur relationship. if u really wanted to marry her and loved her as much as u say u would never have let it go that far
2006-12-14 14:04:16 · answer #5 · answered by Onie 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You should be honest with your girlfriend, and take the consequences. It's better to be straight from the start. From experience, it's worse finding about it a few months down the line from someone else, than from your mouth straight away.
2006-12-14 14:07:43 · answer #6 · answered by Tom :: Athier than Thou 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Tell your girlfriend what happened but don't expect instant forgiveness. Don't give us this bull**** that you couldn't stop your "friend" ( nice friend ) from doing what she did to you. You are not the victim... your girlfriend is. I'm sure that if this happened to her that you would be furious. By the way, if you "couldn't stop" this girl what makes you so sure that you'll be able to stop this from happening again ??? Think about that.
2006-12-14 14:13:52 · answer #7 · answered by dd 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You know what you have to do. You tell your girlfriend everything and beg for her forgiveness (on bended knee if you think that will help). You have no other options open to you. Good luck.
2006-12-14 14:05:17 · answer #8 · answered by Bethany 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you have to tell her because if this girl did this to knowing about ur girlfriend then she will tell her! and it would be alot better coming from you than her! she might need time but make it up to her prove to her that you can be trusted because you cant have a marriage if you dont have trust
2006-12-14 14:09:57 · answer #9 · answered by atbkkj 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
you got yourself a predicament.
i wouldnt tell her.
telling her will not work...its over
you may have to leave her
2006-12-14 14:05:37 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋