i am muslim , living in America .i have daughter ,she is almost 13 ,now she wants to know about sex?

Question

she told me that kids in her class talk about it all time.but i am not sure when is the right time and what should i tell her and how ? plzzzzzzzzzz help me with keeping mind that we are muslim

Answer 1

answer all of her questions truthfully. it is better for her to be told about it truthfully then to have to find out on her own. in america it is discussed highly and you should be open to all of her questions.

Answer 2

The big important thing here is that you don't want her to just get her information about sex from the kids at school, or TV, or whatever- because if a teenager doesn't get the information from their parents, they'll get it from any other source they can find. I'm sure, you as a parent, want to offer your wiser perspective on the topic.

I'm assuming you'll hope that she'll save herself for marriage, which is great. Can I just say that a big mistake a lot of religious parents make is that they teach their kids something along the lines of "sex is dirty and evil and you should save it for the one you love." Do you see the terribly mixed message in that?

Explain to her why sex is something sacred, and that sacred things aren't to be taken lightly. Explain to her what it means to you and your spouse - how it helps bind you together, and create a family etc.

Good luck.

Answer 3

While i respect the fact that you are Muslim, i would say to toss that for a minute.

when talking about sex for the first time whth your child, talk about it as a biological function, tell them about Pregnancy, and transmitible diseases. and what these diseases do to a person.

then go into the moral aspeact of it. and explain your beliefs and feelings about pre-marital sex.

(now bring in the religion)

use your religious beliefs and examples from your text's, to back up your statements.

do not make it a taboo subject (dont make it dinner table talk either) but let her know that she can talk to you about it at any time that she needs to.

you would much rather be her source of information, than the guy at school that is trying to get under her skirt. in America many people begin having sex when they are between 13 and 17.
this gives you just a few short years to help them make the right choices.

Answer 4

Which would you prefer? a lesson from you or a lesson from her friends or some visual readings? This is America and at 13, it is not too early for her to learn it somewhere else and it could be unhealthy. Might as well come from you with warnings about irresponsible behaviours. I leave in Saudi Arabia and I am sorry to tell you, promiscuities happened inside their homes because of parents way of suppressing informations. Parents consider it taboo to discuss these thing to their children but never realizes that it tend the children more to learn it wrongly from outside or worst incestously.

Answer 5

Start w/ the facts. Have a sit down with her and discuss the "birds and the bees" No doubt she is already familiar w/ your faith's stance on premarital relations, but it wouldn't hurt to reemphasis this once again :). Pray for her to be strong enough to make the right decisions and to choose abstinence. It is important for her to know biologically what is going on w/ her body. If kids get this instruction at home I believe this leads to fewer problems that can arise from curiosity.

Good post. One that is on my mind lately as well. I am also preparing for this w/ my own daughter.

Be blessed.

Answer 6

As a Muslimah I understand!!!! Whenever your child is asking question about it, thats a sign it is the right time to talk about it!!! You can't keep her ignorant because you don't know if its the right time to tell her!! You should just explain to her the basics and most importantly let her know that she should wait until she is married before having sex. I also think its important to explain all the STD's and unwanted pregnancies that result in pre-marital sex!!

Answer 7

you are able to no longer help the very fact you have a weigh down, so do no longer beat your self up over it. i think the reason you at the instant are not meant date is so as which you at the instant are not tempted by making use of what dating will convey approximately. Liking somebody else isn't the comparable ingredient nonetheless, and except you sense such as you will act in a fashion it relatively is erroneous in accordance on your ideals, i do no longer think of you would be able to desire to be hectic approximately it. you would be able to get some extra useful solutions in the Ramadan area. nonetheless individually, I say in simple terms appreciate the sensation of liking yet another individual for who they are, and remember your ideals so as which you stick to them on the comparable time. And in case you recognize an grownup you have confidence to furnish you good suggestion, with out judging you, then refer to them approximately it besides. A weigh down is in simple terms a weigh down, in case you place it in attitude. you're 13 additionally, it relatively is tremendously youthful. shop in mind that they do no longer frequently final. If it particularly bothers you, refer to somebody approximately it, and pray. in the meanwhile nonetheless, do no longer beat your self up over what you are able to no longer administration.

Answer 8

Just be truthful, and make sure you tell her why its better to wait.
Tell her that its only for people you love, show her pictures of STDS, and tell her that some people don't know they have it,
make sure you tell her that boys talk about girls after sex and that most boys don't love the women they sleep with, make a point to explain to her that being a virgin isn't a bad thing and that her husband will be proud to have that. Tell her it is wrong and she must wait to get married, tell her the horros of todays of teenagers getting pregnant. Tell her how many boyfriend move on to another girl after they have sex with their present girlfriend.

Give her the realistic truth, her peers are going to make her feel that she has to have sex to be a pre-teen, or that she is not cool or down if she doesn't have sex. They want to screw up he rlife and turn her into a premcious young girl,it a game to them.

Recap

Expalin it is only for a special special person whom marries her

the hypocritcy of boys who are not looking for long term relationships and how they brag and spread the private news among their friends and the school

IMPORTANT: show her pictures of STDS, like herpes and Aids, have her read about them, tell her some people may look unaffected or not know they are infeccted and past it on

Tell her that is is special to be a virgin, and Virgins are sought after and that she should save it for her husband, a man whom will be honorned and proud

tell her the "Loser profile" of teen pregnacies, she may see it as cool or women like, but tell how it is not a good thing

Put her in some some extra culliar activities, usually bored tems experment with sex, I was into Music, make sure she's in something that requires and pulls in her desire and dedication

Be open with her, don't get mad, make it easy for her to come to you with questions, its GREAT that she has come to you, be honests and never tell her she to young to get more info, she will come to you about everything and hear your voice when a boy tries to pressure her.

Tell her that is is weak to succumb to her peers and she should not feel shy or discouraged to be honest and say, " I'm waiting because its against my religion,"

Answer 9

what does the koran says about this issue? america is a liberal country, as long as you're living there ther's no escaping from it. i do not know what limitations your religion has with regards to sex education, religion or not your daughter is going to learn about sex, either from you or from her friends, the only way to keep her away from it is 1) lock her in the house 2) move to iraq

Answer 10

If you don't tell her yourself she will find it out the other way. It is better to tell her what she wants to know but not in too much graphic details. May Allah help you with this.