what is your thought on this type of marriage. you should understand that this is like a system built into indian and many asian cultures and they have their own view on this. but why do you disagree or agree with this? any interesting stories?
how can I avoid an arranged marriage? (knowing that my family will probably not listen to what I have to say)
2006-12-14 11:07:33 · 12 answers · asked by India 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Your best way to avoid anything you don't want to do is to associate yourself with as many people as possible who are of like-mind to you... In your case.. seek out family and friends who you know will see things your way and who will help you in being able to choose your partner, or choose not to be married at all.
Personally, I have mixed feelings overall about marriage, period.
My grandparents had an arranged marriage in a small town in Italy and things worked out for them on many levels. They seemed to have this destiny together that suited their time and place in life. We live in a completely different age where modern marriages aren't very logical at all. There is a huge contradiction in what people are traditionally taught and in what all people feel inside in regard to love, companionship, and sexuality.
Best wishes to you in your life and in dealing with the traditions of your family.
Namaste.
2006-12-14 11:20:03 · answer #1 · answered by Jape Coyote 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just don't think it should be solely up to your parents who you spend the rest of your life with... but then again, I don't come from the same culture...
I would say you can avoid an arranged marriage by talking to them first and telling them your side of the story... and if they still want to arrange your marriage, I would leave. Just move somewhere else.. but I know this isn't possible for a lot of people, to just get up and go... I'm not sure what to tell you really...
2006-12-14 19:16:35 · answer #2 · answered by F.J. 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just know that it is hell trying to tell your parents that you do not want to marry someone they picked out for you. But you have to stick to your guns. No one in my family stood up for me. There was always this battle of "We are not trying to force you" yet they would not accept no for an answer. Well, to this day I still can not accept the idea of arranged marrige with some guy that I don't even like or know. But I am satisifed with my decision. Especially after hearing that the divorce rate with arranged marriges are increasing more and more. Either that or women are completly unhappy with there lives in an arranged marrige situation. The best thing you can do for yourself is go to shcool and focus on a career. Whatever that may be. There are chances that you may meet someone who is nice and your parents may approve of as well. In the end remember one thing. You are the one that has to deal with what happens after the marrige contract has been signed. As much as your parents and family may love you, they will be less help if you are having problems in your marrige. Because accorsing to tradition you are the girl therefore you must be the one to sacrifice your needs..... One more thing. Someone once told me. That if you are happy your parents will be happy for you............. Its your life. Don't be irresponsible.
2006-12-14 19:23:55 · answer #3 · answered by Junoon 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
disagree, try 2 find a guy that u like before they can arrange the marriage
2006-12-14 19:09:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anna 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
India
2006-12-14 19:38:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
disagree u should marry some1 that U r totally happy and in love wit not some1 that ur parents think u could be happy wit seriously they dont know that u will be happy n the last thing they should want is 2 c there child in an unhappy relationship...
2006-12-14 19:12:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
omg wow im pakistani and my family is like that too! i know how you feel...its really hard to understand the fact that our parents will choose the person we will marry. i dont agree with it at all. but our parents want our best and they're just trying to do wats in the culture in our countries. but i still understand how you dont want to cuz i feel the same way. so wat ive decided is that whenevr they try showing me a guy to get married to, im gonna be say i dont wanna get married yet! so im hoping its gonna work. and by that time i will try finding a guy who is in one of thier friends's family and maybe it'll work out....? well we'll see wat happens... do you live in india or USA?
2006-12-14 19:15:55 · answer #7 · answered by maryam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
complex issue. query in google or bing. that may help!
2014-11-13 05:00:27 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think theres nothing wrong with parents introducing a guy to a girl and it being her decision whether or not she wants to build a future with the man. however forcing is just wrroong.
talk to your parents. or find a good guy, with a great backround that you know your parents will love and then introduce them to him. hey, its worth a shot
2006-12-14 19:12:00 · answer #9 · answered by bella 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ummm i suppose it works for some people. . . idk i think it is a little old fashioned though. . . you should try and find someone in your family that will stand up for you. . .aunt.. . cousin. . . idk and if that doesn't work i;m sure there are people out there that would help you. . . no one should be forced into anything they don't want to do
2006-12-14 19:11:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋