my boyfriend promised me hed quit smoking before i started dating him, he quit down alot ( it only lasted about 1 week ) now hes not trying anymore and hes smoking again ALOT he knows it bothers me but i hate to nagg him what do you think i should do i love him alot and i dont want to lose him over some thing stupid even though i do not see this as stupid
2006-12-14 10:54:34 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He has to want to quit if it's gonna work. You can urge him to try but you can't force anything on someone who's addicted to something. They've got to want it and do it themselves. You have to ask yourself if you can deal with his smoking or not and then decide if you want to stay in the relationship.
2006-12-14 10:56:41 · answer #1 · answered by PS 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being that you are a non smoker means that you have no idea how hard a habbit it is to break, yes smoking is bad for you and can indeed kill you why don't you tell him something he doesn't know. Most people who smoke feel very stupid for doing it anyway, everyone I know who smokes don't do it because they think it makes them look good and when you quit it has to be for yourself and a whole lot a will power. I wish the same amount of sympathy was given to smokers as it his "smack heads" nobody I know steals to buy fags or sells their body yet the whole world is on the sympathy train for that addiction.
2006-12-14 11:12:09 · answer #2 · answered by Sarah M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Smoking is not stupid. Its a serious habit. It's a hard habit to break. IF you love the guy, then you will have to put up with his smoking. He will quit when he is ready, nothing you say will make him stop. If you hate the smoking then you have to make a choice. My mom has been married to my dad for over 40 years. He never ever quit for her. She complained all of her life. Now they finally have separate bedrooms. She loves it.
What I am trying to say is that smoking is his problem. If you don't like it, u are gonna have to decide what to do. Good luck.
2006-12-14 11:01:03 · answer #3 · answered by cutencurley_05 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Smoking is a very hard addiction to quit. I think you need to stop nagging him, cos the more you nag the more he will keep on smoking. Stress is one main factor that makes it hard to quit and you are stressing him. Just be patient and supportive and he will do it in his own time.
I smoked for 15 years prior to giving up 5 1/2 months ago. It is extremely hard and I don't think i have ever had to endure so much anguish in other personal accomplishments.
2006-12-14 10:59:55 · answer #4 · answered by aingelic1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two choices. Live with it, or keep nagging till he goes to an anti smoking clinic. As a smoker myself, I warn you you may have to settle for the first option. However, as regards nagging, there's nagging and nagging. If you don't do it too often, and make it clear it's because, you love the guy, and don't want to lose him from any of the smoking-related diseases, you may get away with it. Just nagging "Because I don't like the smell of smoke" probably won't work.
2006-12-14 11:11:48 · answer #5 · answered by Ghostrider 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that if you make it habit you may never quit, and when you decide to quit you can't. I use to smoke and if I knew how hard it was to stop I wouldn't have started. Not smoking saves you a lot of money.
2006-12-14 11:07:59 · answer #6 · answered by kayef57 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First ask why does it bother you? Then try and compromise, make him go out side to smoke and no smoking in the car. If you love him like you say you do then why are you trying to change him. WHY do you women always do that. If you really LOVE somebody you would LOVE them for who they are and not what you want them to be.
2006-12-14 11:00:43 · answer #7 · answered by kinreep 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you nagg him, he will either try but resent you, or hide it from you, or dump you! My fella smoked! I dont have a problem with him smoking, as long as he dont do it in my house, or dont ever want to kiss me... yukkkkkk! so its up to him!! He decided, that he wanted to give up smoking! Well thats his choice.. and I support him... but I never nag him!
2006-12-14 12:27:28 · answer #8 · answered by Bobbie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no its not stupid ur thinking of ur life and hes not. u have a choice and im sorry but no outside advice is really gonna be able to help that much cause the decision is still ur's to make i hope u figure out the best thing 4 u.
2006-12-14 11:00:41 · answer #9 · answered by le_le_06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry but if u relly love him then you should take him to a quit smoking session, if he doesnt like it and dumps u. then forget him and get someone with a future not some loser who will die ur both 56 years old and too fat, old and tired to date another person.
i hope this helps... oh by the way also try to talk to him and tell him ur feelings.
2006-12-14 10:59:19 · answer #10 · answered by Rez 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋