when to stop????

Question

when should a person stop having a shower or bath with there children .. my son is 3 1/2 and he has showers with me and sometimes baths, i have a bath with my 6 month old son and my 3 year old always wants to join us and he helps wash my 6 month old while we are in the tub.. at what age should i stop him from showering with me and having baths with me,, and how do i tell him he cant get into the bath with me and my other son without hurting his feelings,, should i stop having baths with my 6 month old too.???

Answer 1

You know I was kind of thinking that the people on here saying you shouldn't bathe with your boys b/c they are boys were weird, but when I think about...I'd be uncomfortable with my daughter bathing with her dad. I'd think it was weird...and I know it's b/c you don't hear of it...that's it.

On another note, I think that the age depends upon the child. Whenever he starts to realize that you have different parts and starts asking questions, that's when it should stop...that is unless he's 5 and still doing it...that's a bit extreme.

You said that he wants in the tub and he helps wash your 6 month old? Well, you could always put them in the tub together and let your 3 year old really help wash him...like make him in charge. That way, it'll distract him from you not being in the tub. You can be there to supervise, of course. Then, whenever you can, you can take a bath with your 6 month old when your 3 year old isn't around so that he doesn't feel hurt.

I would also recommend a talk. Tell him that big boys like to bath without their mommy's and he's a big boy now. Let him know that he's very mature and that's why you want him to bathe without you. And praise him on it. Make everything you say positive and make it about him...don't make it about you thinking he's too old, etc. That way, he'll think, "Hey, Mom thinks I'm a big boy and I'm going to show her I can be."

Best of luck...and it's NOT creepy!

Answer 2

I Stopped taking baths/showers with my son at about 18 months
what i think would be best is to give both your kids a bath together and you watch them then later you take a nice relaxing bath by your self! then you can have some "you" time and the kids have more room to play in the bath tub.

Answer 3

You should probably try to stop soon so he doesn't get the wrong idea. Just explain to him that your other baby will get very hurt if you don't stay in the bath but you son is getting to be so big that he can take baths all by himself. And still stay in the bathroom with him and play with him so he knoaws you still love him. If you are married or in a relationship (I don't want to assume anything) wait until your significant other is home at the same time as you and take turns with the babies. If you don't, bathe your other baby when your 3 year old is playing or isn't around. You just want him to understand that he's not a baby anymore.

Answer 4

i have a 3 year old girl and 14 months old girl somethings they bath with their daddy or shower but he will wear a bathing suit or boxers, it depends on how open you want to be with them, i dont think it matters cuz as long as you tell them what the differents between a boy and girl is then it is okay, they are your kids, so you can have then take a bath together and you watch them, my little girls take baths together, the 14 month old when she was younger the make a little blue tub she can sit in and it holds her up and has little toys on it to play with butt the bottom is open so their legs can feel the water and splash around too. my little girl sometime take baths with her friend that is a boy they are both 3 years old, they little boy asked what she dont have a turtle( that is what they called their penis) and his mom told him because she had a butterfly and he dont ask again.

Answer 5

Explain to him that now that he's a big boy he can take a bath all by himself. The baby is so little s/he needs your help.

Kids get a kick out of being "big". Maybe start putting them in together, and staying out yourself?

I do think at 3 1/2 now he's old enough to start remembering things, it's time for mommy/son baths to end.

Answer 6

i too used to shower with my son and stopped when he was 2 he may want to take a bath with you and your 6 month old because he wants attention he may be feeling a little left out so when he asks to get in the bath with you and your 6 month old get his mind off it and ask him to go get baby some clothes and offer him to help give the baby a bath but without getting in the tub

Answer 7

I read somewhere that age 3 was the cutoff, and that's what I'm going by with my daughter. She's had several baths with me and a few showers with her daddy. She's seen our bodies but she's not terrible curious about them. Now that she's three she still wants to take baths with me (we have a jacuzzi that she loves). Instead I put her in the bath with a bunch of toys and bubbles and "busy" myself in the bathroom by rearranging the medicine cabinet or doing my makeup, so I'm with her but she can see I'm too busy to get in.

Since your son wants to have playtime in the tub, let him bath with his little brother while you supervise.

Also it's a good time to start talking about privacy. We tell our daughter she can have privacy to use the toilet, and we expect the same thing. Just make him aware that it's good to have privacy and independence in the bathroom.

Answer 8

I never bathed with my kids. I had them in the shower with me only until the could sit up in the tub without help. I let them bathe together until they realized sex differences in each other (boy girl combo). So I think its time for you to stop jumping in the tub. Let the boys bathe together, but its time for you to sit on the sidelines and help from outside the tub.

Answer 9

I guess it depends. I stopped showering with my son when he was 7. I know that sounds old but he wasn't curious about our differences and he still isn't. My sister stopped taking showers with her son when he was 3 and he is a little perv. He always want's to look at what he calls SEXY GIRLS. He is 5 now. He likes to look at movies with naked girls. My son is nothing like that. He is very open and honest with me. We have a open honest relationship. I only tell him what he needs to know and it works out fine. Some would probably say I showered with him to long but It wasn't like I did it everyday. Oh and If they point and say anything about your personal parts you can do either of these: Tell them the difference between girls and boys and continue or stop taking showers with them, or just don't say anything and let them wonder.

Answer 10

There is nothing creepy or wrong about it. And you're children won't get the wrong idea. Kids don't think like that. It's parents with sick mind who come up with that crap. As long as all you are doing is bathing it is fine.

The parents who thinks it's creepy and wrong are the ones with the problem. It's not bad for a child to know there are differences between the sexes and to learn what they are while they are young. Kids are having sexual encounters earlier and earlier these days and the more informed they are, the better the chances they'll make a positive decision.

There is nothing illegal about it. And your children won't be taken away. Honestly....where do these people get there information?

For more info...here's what a pediatrician thinks about it.
http://pediatrics.about.com/od/weeklyquestion/a/05_showrng_tghr.htm