I need advice please!!?

Question

Ok heres the deal and its a lot. Im missing my ex so bad you have no idea I dream of him,think about him all the time and everrything.
We broke up about a yr and a half ago and Im still miserable!. I've dated 5 guys since then and still its killing me like the day of.
We were together 7 yrs and he went into the Military and that was fine we made it through that but then he went away for his training school for 9 months of not seeing him only phone calls and letters. Well 2 weeks before he was to come home I called him and he told me he was so busy playing his video game that he had to go and would call be right back,well 2 days later he called and was like that was really important to me and all this about the game. So I said me or the game,thinking he would be like all sorry and stuff and he said you cant make me choose and I said Ill choose for you and I let him go.Well here it is all this time passed aand Im going nuts wanting him back. He wont even talk to me and says I hurt him

too much. I've begged and begged him for the whole time. Well when he did come home I was still hurt and angry at him so I turned him away.
I regret this everyday that I wake up and I cant get him back . I cry every nite begging God to bring him back and my family thinks I nuts. Someone please help me !! What do I do?? Can I get him back?? Or have I lost him for good??

Answer 1

I completely understand you. I lost the, then, love of my life for a year and a half too. I cried, prayed, daydreamed, I did it all. With my story, He eventually came back to me. I don't want to give you false hope, but if it is really meant to be, back off for just a while and let him come to you. Had some one told me that when I was hurting and heartbroken, I propably would not have listened, but, from my prespective, try and understand. There are a lot more issues between the two of you than just wanting him back. If you get him back without even trying to figure out what those issues are it won't last. trust me, we ended up breaking up again 6mos later because I didn't examin myself and him in the way that I should have and we ended up having similar differences that couldn't be worked out.

First of all, it probably wasen't a good idea to make him choose. I'm sure there could have been a better way communication wise, to let him know that after waiting for him all that time, you didn't feel that it was fair to brush you off like that. And secondly, it seems that he could get his priorties a bit more in order. I'm sure you two can work it out. But you have to give it time. If you hurt him, that means he loves you, if he really loves you, you will be hard to get over. Just give it some time and keep praying. and try to work on those internal things that could keep you from being happy with him or anyone else again in the future. You'll get him back.

Answer 2

After a year and a half I'd say that it is over. It's probably that you didn't spend the time you wanted to with him while he was in the military that is making you want something you might not have ever gotten from this man if he hadn't went in.
You need to just get out of the dumps and find someone who wants your attention instead of video games. I have heard that Military men have problems in relationships anyway, being that they have been in the war environment and everything. When you just let go you will feel free and you will find another man so be patient. Look for a good conversationalist because when you get old that's all you have left! Lol! Good Luck.

Answer 3

I really think you should let him go. Mostly because he chose a video game over you. Now I do know a lot of guys that love their video games, but if they choose a game over you then something's wrong. And he even got mad at you for interrupting his game. I think you did what was best by giving him the decision to choose between you and the game. I don't see how he can say you hurt him when he chose a game over you in the first place. I would tell him how much he hurt you by doing that and if he still doesn't see that he may have been at fault too then I'd just move on.

Answer 4

Going off into the military has allowed him the opportunity to learn that there is a whole lot more in the world than there was in a simple but close relationship. He's growing up. Time for you to do the same.

Answer 5

Case in point......he chose to play his video game over talking to you, which is fine. Guys are like that. BUT....he didn't call for 2 days and you never see each other? Um, you guys drifted apart while he was in the military and I am guessing that he probably wasn't very faithful to you if he treated you like that. Don't chase him anymore. Stop begging for him back! You can't make someone love you!!!!!! If he loves you, he'll come to you.

Answer 6

Looks like the time away from you he just grew apart from you. You can't blame people for outgrowing their feelings. It just happens sometimes. Just be glad he didn't betray or cheat on you (that you know of). Let him go and find someone new, or better yet stay single and get to know yourself and your strengths. You shouldn't want to get back with someone who's outgrown feelings for you- that's just sad. What's that say about you?

Answer 7

since your Friend still thinking that he is the best and proud for that
just ignore him.
you should think that our world is wide and it is not your end of life , it doesn't mean you will remain ideal , still you are young i hope you will have bright future. so take it easy ,
put in your mind always if the thing is not balance see some other chance. coz our time is preciuos.
have a nice time.

Answer 8

he couldn't choose between you and the game??-- don't worry about it. you can find someone better. i spent a long time the same way. talked to him again and was like " what in the world was i thinking. just human nature to want what you can't have.

Answer 9

I would write him a letter and explain how you feel and how you made a mistake letting him go, hopefully he will understand and you 2 can atleast be friends then see where it goes from there.

Answer 10

You need to deal with you. You have a problem. Deal with your feelings, you own anxiety, your fear. You cannot control the actions of another. Get healthy yourself (emotionally), only then will you be able to actually, truly, love another person. It starts with loving yourself.