My 3 year old son is very afraid of our pet german sheppard. My husband says that only way to break our son out of this fear is to lock him in the closet with the dog for a couple of hours so that he will see that the dog is friendly. I don't know if this is a good idea but my husband insist that this is the only way to handle it. He says that whenever he was afraid of anything his mother always locked him in the closet with snakes, weapons and strangers. Do you think that this is a good idea or should we try something else?
2006-12-14 05:09:12 · 59 answers · asked by mamabag06 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I think that this sounds like a good idea make sure you find some of those extremely big snakes and large guns and I kow a couple of strangers that i have seen on myspace and dateline that would be interested in participating in this!
2006-12-14 06:20:29 · answer #1 · answered by Cherry Berry 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
GOD NO!! That will only scar the poor kid and possibly the dog, too!!!
The best thing to do is not force the issue. Kids develop fears naturally, and will also get over them gradually.
I would get a book that helps explain how to help reintroduce your son to your dog. But one way is to be with your son, maybe place your son on your lap and then have the dog sit calmly next to you so that the dog and boy can be in close proximity, but it is controlled. Is your dog "hyper"? That may be what is frightening your son. Sheppards are large, muscular dogs, not to mention menacing looking. They don't have the cute floppy ears and the saggy face that other "cute", "friendly" dogs in the books and cartoons have. And look at the dog cartoons - the mean dogs are generally German Sheppards or Rotweilers. Those are images that stay with kids. But you need to be with him as he gets to know your dog. But the more you push him, the more you will cause the fear, and the more danger you will place your son in. If the dog senses that your son is afraid, it will naturally assert it's dominance, possibly by biting or growling at him, making the fear worse.
Get a book on how to do it. Also maybe call up a breeder or a pet store and find out. Or better yet - contact the Humane Soceity for assistance. They will all be able to give you some tips on how to do it. But please - for the sake of both your dog and your son, don't lock them together in a closet. If your husband still insists on doing it, then I think you need to lock him in the closet with NO food or water.
2006-12-14 05:18:47 · answer #2 · answered by volleyballchick (cowards block) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a horrible idea, and could possibly result in some deep seeded phobias. Time is what is required, 3 yrs is not long, try taking them both for walks together, consistently pointing out the dogs behaviour, have him throw the ball or stick, make this time jovial. If the dog has behavioural issues which are contributing to this ie. jumping up, do not over-react, for this will only intensify your childs fear, making it seem warranted. With time the two will grow to enjoy eachother, and their boundless energy will be complimentary, right now however the dog is simply too large, powerful, and likely does not obey the child, hence your childs will is of little consequence to the dog, it is this which your child fears. Again I would like to reiterate, and perhaps your husband should read this, locking that child in a closet with the dog could be very damaging, if he is adament, do it in a room not a closet, but even this I would not recommend, try time, it will work, reason goes a long way and right now, the dog is beyond your childs capacity of understanding, most if not all 3 yr olds are self-centered, as he becomes aware that the dog too has feelings, fears and a mind, he will warm up to him.
2006-12-14 05:37:11 · answer #3 · answered by iconoclast_ensues 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How would you feel if someone did this to you? This is not a good idea! It shows extreme lack of compassion towards your son. This will traumatize him more than help him. Not to mention how will the dog react when he is confined in a small space with a screaming child? You are better off just allowing your son and the dog to be around each other and do their own thing, and soon your son will realize that the dog will not hurt him, the dog is minding his own business. Just keep an eye on them when they are in the same room. Or perhaps hold your son and pet the dog at the same time, to show your son the dog will not hurt anyone. Maybe the reason your son is afraid of your dog is that the dog is aggressively friendly and doesn't realize your son is afraid. That's why I suggest watching how they interact so you can get the dog away if he is doing that. Hope this helps!
2006-12-14 05:24:53 · answer #4 · answered by MandaPanda 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Why would he think locking the dog and your son in a closet is going to help.Lock your husband in the closet until he starts using his brain. You must slowly help your son get over his fear of the family pet. Get down on your knees to your son's height and just see how tall the dog looks from his point of view. That is a lot of sharp teeth at his eye level. I would first have him just look at the dog and see that "Max" is a nice dog. Slowly put his hand on your hand and let him see it is ok to pet the dog.Do not rush things. The only thing your mother-in-law taught your husband is how to be a bully(that is assuming he 's telling the truth and I doubt it).Don't force the friendship but gently encourage it.
2006-12-14 05:26:21 · answer #5 · answered by gussie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would look at what your husband said and take it as a clue that maybe something traumatic happened to him. As far as your son, he's only 3 and to him a big german shepherd is pretty scary. If you put them in a room together, they would both get scared and they would both feed off of each other's fear and something might happen. I think a better idea would be to put both of them on neutral ground. Take them both to a park and start playing with the dog. Show your son that the dog is harmless and is just playing. When your son gets the courage, have him start playing with the dog to see it's ok. You can't always force something that's going to take some time. I would do it in a positive way for both the dog and your son.
2006-12-14 05:13:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are kidding, this is a pretty sick post.
If you are serious, then you husband was abused as a child, he now wants to abuse your son and you appear not to know the difference between right and wrong.
How terrifying for a small boy! Please do not under any circumstances lock your small son (or any kid or person for that matter) in a closet with what scares them.
That is bad, wrong, sick, disgusting, a sign of lower intelligence, abusive and if anyone finds out...anyone with 1/2 a brain, they could turn you in and you might end up visiting your son in a foster care facility.
Your husband's mother locked him in a closet with snakes? Strangers?? Sounds either far fetched or the work of a very impaired individual.
You should consider leaving your husband. and please don't have more kids with that man.
If I knew where you lived, I would have called Social Services 2 seconds after reading your post.
2006-12-14 05:14:19 · answer #7 · answered by ssssss 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I don't think this is a good idea. It is true that maybe being around the dog might make his fear go away, but not like that. Sit down with the dog and your child. Make your child feel comfortable and safe. Maybe have the dog on a leash and hold your son's hand. Show him that your dog is safe and fun to be around. He will hopefully learn that your dog could be his new friend, rather then a scare.
Has your dog ever done anything vicious around your son?
Don't expect your son to crack overnight, it might take a while but just be patient with him! Hes a little kid and the dog is a big dog!
2006-12-14 05:55:46 · answer #8 · answered by eric 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would recommend NOT putting the child in the closet with the dog. That could torment the child for YEARS!! The child could get even MORE scared of your dog as well as any other dog. And for your husband to do something like that or have that done to him I honestly think it's inhumane. If the child is afraid of your dog, sit with your child and the dog and just spend some time with each other. Do this regularly. Have you and your husband play with your animal while your son is outside with you (or inside). Teach your son to play fetch with the dog. But don't do something that might traumatise him for life.
2006-12-14 05:16:09 · answer #9 · answered by dragonlady042 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HELL NO!!! To lock your 3 year old in the closet would be scary enough, but with an animal he is afraid of!?! If you want your son to go into counseling, then lock him up, but other than that, do something practical, like let him see the dog, slowly walk up to the dog while someone is holding the dog and see if he wants to pet the dog. Dang, do scare the crud out of him.
2006-12-14 05:54:14 · answer #10 · answered by SINGLEMOM4 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's still just a baby....he will get over his fear on his own time. DO NOT EVER do anything stupid like that. Would you want to be locked in a closet with your greatest fear?? Much less a child!!
Sounds to me like your husband was abused as a child. Was he cured of his fears by his experiences? Ask him if he hated being locked up like that himself. He obviously remembers the incidents and if he thinks it was okay for his mother to do that to him, he might need some parental counseling so he doesn't act like his mother towards your child! Seriously, you should both be beaten if you traumatize your child like that!
I sure hope you are joking and just trying to get a rise out of people with your question. It is absurd.
2006-12-14 05:50:31 · answer #11 · answered by LadyMagick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋