we met in july, our first date was sept. 20th Since then we have been inseperable... we have decided to see each other "exclusivily" and things are going well. He rents at his best friends house but he just got married and wants his house back so my boyfriend has 3 months to move out. He just applied to buy his friends trailer( a nice one in a manufactured home community BTW) and was approved, however, he must be approved by the park as well, which may not happen according to his friend...N E way, If he cannot get approved, is it approiate to tell him he can stay with me (paying rent of course) until he can get a place or we can see how it goes and maybe he can just live with me... He is there all the time any way... I know it is soon, and i don't want to ruin it, but if he has a hard time finding another place... I want to help him out....but will asking scare him away?
2006-12-14 02:39:54 · 16 answers · asked by ladyjno7 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
just a little side note...i have been in love with him from the moment I met him and decided that night we were ment for each other...We will get married someday...I have no doubt, but I want to do this right and I want him to be comfortable too, I know he loves me, but these are huge steps for him, and there is no need to rush, I just want him to have a place to live...
2006-12-14 02:48:56 · update #1
I wouldn't. You haven't known him that long.
2006-12-14 02:43:01 · answer #1 · answered by Texan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first off I think people spend too much time worrying about the technicalities of what someone else thinks is right or wrong based on time. True, you should be sure that the person your with is worth the time and effort for yourself to persue farther into a serious relationship.But, If you are both spending the time together all the time as it is,I don't see there being too much of an issue having him stay with you till he can find another place or till you both decide to get a different place together that is both of your place.Either way, nothing is irreversible.If this don't work out be honest enough with him and yourself to say so and then move on. No reason to go into this with the idea that its written in stone.Nothing in life is. Relax and don't put so much tension into something that really isn't that much of a change than what you already are doing.Cause if you do, that's going to be the thing to make it turn bad.
2006-12-14 10:51:41 · answer #2 · answered by vmaxer85 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
big chance ... do you really feel you know his outlook on dating and marriage in just a few months, moving in can make someone feel comfortable without having to make advances. Then you'd be left with having to dump him if you felt it was time to "go to the next level" and he wasn't ready ... proximity of living together gives the look of moving up in the relationship which may not be true at this point ... wait. Too many people move fast in the "in love and inseparable" stage only to find out that there were so many hidden issues ... talk real life expectations !!!
been there done that, now married - to someone else!
2006-12-14 11:10:00 · answer #3 · answered by Chele 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) So, you have been dating for four months right... and you are inseparable.. of course you are, you're still in the "honeymoon" stage... that's o.k. just realize it.
2) Ask him?? I would change that to "offer to help for a specific time period".. that would be totally o.k. say 3 months or so..
- Friendship is a big part of any relationship.. and making the offer is an offer you would make any close friend.. The part you must protect yourself against is wanting to stay... You don't know him well enough to give up your freedom yet.. wait at least a year before making that kind of "life changing" decission..
- Hope I helped.
2006-12-14 10:50:12 · answer #4 · answered by gjm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It probably won't scare him, but relationally I think it is a bad idea. Let him get a place. You should not move in together until you get married. Statistically speaking, moving in together before marriage is a major factor in near term divorce. Those who don't live together stand a statistically much better chance of a successful relationshiop. Fact!
2006-12-14 10:45:53 · answer #5 · answered by twicewise 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you have a very level head, which is good in situations like this. I think maybe wait and see if he is approved and then if not, if you feel that it would be ok for him to stay with you for a while or move in approach the subject then.
2006-12-14 10:45:19 · answer #6 · answered by melissa_anne_maison 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st of all, who is this dana brown and why is this person putting their link on all answers, they should be reported. Now on to your question...
It sounds like you are somewhat ready to start living with this person. I do hope he is stable as far as employment goes. You should do up a written agreement with him on the terms and conditions since the place you live is yours. If he loves you and is willing to do this, it should not be a problem. You would hate to have something happen in this relationship with him owing you money. Good luck with this....hope it all works out.
2006-12-14 10:46:55 · answer #7 · answered by chad_zortman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouln't ask him to move in. No. I'm not worried about scaring him away. You need to think about yourself and your relationship. You've not known him long AT ALL, and you don't know everything about someone in that short of time, I don't care if you spent every waking moment with that person. It's not appropriate hands down as far as relationship-wise.
2006-12-14 10:49:23 · answer #8 · answered by mannysmom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let things play out and see what happens...but if you think and feel he is the one for you then ask him..Life is too short to worry. If he says no then you know where you stand. Remember to set clear rules if he moves in, with regard to bills etc.
Good luck
2006-12-14 10:43:49 · answer #9 · answered by Mama~peapod 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Far too early, ive been with my guy 6 years and we have been inseperable all along and we are only just moving in together next year.
Dont do it
2006-12-14 10:52:35 · answer #10 · answered by Jayne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Too soon for that if he asks then offer but don't put the offer out there before he mentions it
2006-12-14 10:42:50 · answer #11 · answered by nitenurse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋