My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost two yrs. now. He's lazy around the house, doesn't show me affection hardly ever, he's an alchoholic, and I've got a gut feeling he's cheating on me. (We live together, and the only car we have is mine, so it would be easy.) On the other hand he's wonderful with my son, and is really sweet to me when he wants to be, he works 10hrs. a day, so he pulls in more money than I do waitressing. That puts me in a kind of financially dependant spot. Yesterday he left for the store to get a pizza, and was gone 2 and 1\2 hrs! I got upset and told him I was moving out....but I don't know if i can 'cuz of the money. I do love him though...ugh advice!!!! PLEASE!!! Only serious answers please!
2006-12-14 02:25:57 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Find a way to bring some money in and be independent of him. Ask yourself in your heart if he's really what you want. When you know that answer you'll know what to do.
2006-12-14 02:33:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is obvious that you are not happy so you must be willing to make sacrifices in order to be happy alone and/or be with someone who treats you right, instead of going thru the motions. Of course for financial and emotional reasons, it will be hard to leave him, but you know that you don't want or need to be in his environment. Even more so, think about your son. How is your bf's laziness, non affection, & alcoholism going to affect him as a male. Your bf may feel like he can treat u the way he does bc he's knows your dependent on him for money. You seem like a bright, strong women.You know what you have to do & deserve better. KICK HIM OUT OR START LOOKING 4 ANOTHER PLACE!
2006-12-14 10:37:53 · answer #2 · answered by missbronzebeauty09 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First and foremost...speaking from experience...TRUST YOUR GUT!!! NEVER EVER DOUBT IT!!! That being said, you two need to communicate. Talk to him, tell him your feelings...that you love him etc. If you both want the relationship to work then you will BOTH be willing to work on it. No relationship will last if both partners do not give 100%. Maybe he is stressed about something or just tired. You have to ask these questions...but not in a way that you are accusing him of anything. Relationships need transparency in them, the wondering, suspecting, assuming will drive you crazy and ruin the relationship and fill it with suspicion and resentment. Just be honest with how you are feeling and ask him if he needs to talk. As far as the drinking...it has to stop!! Maybe he is drinking because of emotions he is covering. This is a hard one and my prayers are with you. But honestly if you cant communicate and the relationship is like this....would you want to stay and raise your child in that environment? Good Luck and my prayers are with all of you.
2006-12-14 11:22:38 · answer #3 · answered by hurtand still in love 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do Not stay with this bum, even though he is good with your son, if he is cheating he is bringing his dirty deed work home to share with you!!!! YOu can find low income housing that is very affordable, contact your local family services department for help. You can get food stamps and help with your son, in the meantime look for another job, or you can go to school and most states have a program for single mothers where they Pay you to go to school...my neice is doing it and she is doing fine now, you do not need a lazy leech around you or your kid! What are you teaching him? 2.5 hr to get a pizza, sounds like something kinda of "anchoveish" to me! Wise up girl you are not a dumb bunny, when you make the step to move out, you may be surprised at the people that will step forward to help you!
2006-12-14 10:34:37 · answer #4 · answered by Joyce D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In these cases, with alcohol and drug abuse, they never get better they only get worse. The only way it will get better for you if and only if your boyfriend realizes he has a problem. Admitting it is the first step then getting help. If he does not admit he has a problem things will not get better. Of course he is not showing any affection, all the affection is going to the booze! And if you have a gut feeling he is cheating then nine times out of ten he is! My best friends boyfriend is a crack head, and she has been struggling with abuse, down to him stealing from her. My best friend has bottomed out, she has lost her house, job, car, and family behind this man. Do not let yourself fall into this lifestyle. Answer this ? has he hit you. if you answered yes to this, he love his alcohol more than he loves you and your son and its time for you to get out of the relationship. Just like you found this man, be strong willed you will find another..
Good Luck!
2006-12-14 10:36:52 · answer #5 · answered by Justice 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lose this bum. He probably is cheating on you with a stripper or something. I bet he's really sweet to you when he wants some. But you gotta decide what works for you. Maybe explain your feeling to him and see what happens.
2006-12-14 10:44:15 · answer #6 · answered by CuriousMishawaka 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to pull it together and move out before you are in so deep you will never be able to leave.
2006-12-14 10:28:31 · answer #7 · answered by Alexandra 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first you should try to get your husband into acholics anyomonous. second if you really believe hes cheating on you or doesnt love you anymore you should get a divorse.
2006-12-14 10:30:37 · answer #8 · answered by unit_804 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋